Ch. 21 - The Part Of Me That Wants You

Chapter Twenty-One - The Part Of Me That Wants You

Conflicting emotions tended to be exhausting, so for the sake of keeping his stamina up, Jonathan lied to himself that, for the time being, it would just be better to play along with Maddox's plan. Would a month be enough to get over it? He had the answer to that, not that he liked it, but he was too weak to resist. On the upside, he would get plenty of experience, which meant that he would walk into a real relationship, fully knowing what being together with a guy sexually was all about.

Yes, spending time with Maddox, hot and sweaty between the sheets, had a practical purpose. And wasn't he the one who wished to change? It was a test of his resolve at the same time. If he fell for Maddox it would be his own fault, and he would deal with it.

Sure, there were downsides to giving in to attraction, such as the need for long showers in the company of his hand. Jonathan snorted at his own inability to get Maddox out of his mind, as he walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist.

"You have a visitor," Ray announced.

Jonathan smiled. Having Maddox over so soon was more than he had hoped for.

"It's Rusty," Ray added.

Jonathan's smile froze.

"I let him into your room while you were in the shower. I hope you don't mind," Ray added. His voice dropped. "He looked like he wanted to walk into the bathroom to talk to you, but that would have been a bit weird, right?"

Jonathan sighed. "No problem, Ray. I'll deal with him."

Why was Rusty there? Could it be that he and Maddox were still mad at each other? Maddox had a reason, at least. Half a reason. Ten percent of a reason? Jonathan walked into his room, unprepared for what Rusty wanted to tell him.

The guy was sprawled on the bed, his long legs hanging over the edge. He straightened up as soon as Jonathan opened the door.

"I came to say sorry," Rusty said directly, letting his forearms rest on his thighs, bending forward. He looked up at Jonathan, holding his head cocked to one side.

Jonathan had a very disturbing crush on Rhett Butler at a very young age, and although he had worked that out of his system, the way Rusty was staring upward at him like that reminded him of Rhett shamelessly eyeing Scarlett from the foot of the staircase. He shook away the image; he tended to be overdramatic sometimes, and while Rusty had some roguish charm going for him, his goofy smile had nothing to do with being an attractive movie icon.

Still, Jonathan grabbed the towel where it twisted to keep itself in place in a self-conscious manner. "All right," he said in a cool voice. "Consider it forgotten."

Rusty's smile grew broader. "What do you have to hide under that?" he asked.

Could it be that this brazen attitude got Rusty what he wanted? Jonathan was about to pull backward defensively when he remembered his conversation with Dex. Rusty was a challenger by definition. He needed some putting in place. So, instead of pulling the towel tightly around himself, Jonathan lifted it, grabbed his balls and cock and flaunted them for a moment.

"Was that what you wanted to see, Rusty?"

He let the towel fall back and then crossed his arms over his chest, staring Rusty down, and feeling pretty smug.

Rusty's eyes were wide in shock and his lips formed an excited O. "Nice," he commented. "Again, do it again."

Jonathan snorted. "Nope, this is all you're getting. Aren't you supposed to be past the phase when you're curious about other boys' junk?"

"Aren't you?" Rusty shot back, and his eyes twinkled.

Jonathan looked down and shook his head with mirth. "Touché," he admitted.

"Touché," Rusty mimicked and laughed.

There was something infectious about Rusty and his good mood. Jonathan could totally see why he had no problem whatsoever getting girls. He chuckled, as well.

"So, do you forgive me?" Rusty asked in the same frank way that appeared to define him.

"Sure. All good?" Jonathan felt the need to ask. He truly didn't want Maddox to be on not speaking terms with his best friend. He offered Rusty his hand after the guy stood from the bed.

"Ew," Rusty pulled away, "you just had your hand on your balls."

"I just took a shower," Jonathan protested and then wiped his palm over Rusty's shoulder, making the other snicker hysterically.

"You're nasty, Hamilton," Rusty said.

"Maybe I am."

Jonathan was surprised when Rusty pulled him into a hug. "Be nice to Maddox. Or even nasty a little, if that's what he likes. Just don't hurt him and stuff. Unless he really wants you to."

Jonathan patted Rusty on the back. "I have no intention of doing that."

Unlike the hug Maddox had given him that time, triggering a chain of events that brought them to where they were right now, this one didn't give Jonathan any unfamiliar jolt or the well-known shock of desire. These guys appeared to like hugging a lot. Rusty released him and, for a moment, they stared at each other.

"Can you tell me why you did that, though?" Jonathan asked.

Rusty's shoulders rose and fell, followed by a sigh. "I was drunk, but that's not it. Maddox is into you big time. And he's my friend."

Jonathan didn't pretend to understand what Rusty was trying to get at. "And?" he asked, more and more curious.

Rusty rubbed the back of his neck and seemed uncomfortable for a moment. "I wanted you to punch me so that I could get into a fight with you."

"Oh," Jonathan managed. "Why?"

The mischievous green eyes bore into his. "Can I ask you something, Jonathan?" The rogue seemed serious for a change.

"Sure."

"Don't steal my buddy, 'kay? I mean date him, fuck him, whatever, but let him still be my best friend."

Jonathan didn't know how to unpack that. Was that it? Rusty thought he would steal Maddox as his best friend? "I wouldn't even know how to do that," he replied in all honesty.

"Good." Rusty smiled again. "Cause I won't forgive you if you do. I'll come back for that punch and that fight if it happens."

Jonathan saw Rusty to the door without another word. What was it with these boys and their insecurities? And he thought he was a hot mess.

"See you around, Hamilton," Rusty said.

Jonathan was about to close the door when Rusty pivoted on his heels and faced him from up close. "What now?" he asked, only slightly unnerved by the invasion of his personal space. Slightly, because he was starting to get used to Rusty and his strangeness.

"You're really pretty. No wonder Maddox likes you. And that's some top quality junk down there. Just saying." The last words came with an all-knowing smirk.

Jonathan groaned, rolled his eyes, and gave Rusty a firm shove. "All right, thanks for the compliment. But take this piece of advice with you, straight boy. Don't go around, staring at other guys' junk. That might not be too wise."

Rusty gave him a solid thumbs-up and walked down the corridor, laughing. Jonathan shook his head in disbelief. Maddox's friends were truly an interesting bunch.

The thing was, he thought, as he returned to his room, that a certain something needed correction. Maddox hadn't ever been in his room, while Dex and Rusty had already visited him. Today, Jonathan felt courageous, and on top of everything, to prove that he was in control, he needed to start acting like it.

And he would call, not text. At the second ring, Maddox answered. "Yes?" he drawled.

Only he could throw lewd insinuations into a single word. Jonathan felt his cheeks getting hot and his earlier courage dissolving into a puddle of disappointment in himself at his feet. "Um, Rusty was here. He apologized."

"Yeah, I know," Maddox said.

"So, you're cool with him now, right?"

"Only if you forgave him."

"I did."

"Then I'm cool," Maddox replied and laughed softly. "Rusty's not a bad guy."

"I believe you." Jonathan licked his lips. His throat was suddenly dry, yet his palms were sweaty. He squeezed his eyes shut. If he did it fast, he wouldn't have to overthink it. "Would you like to come over?"

"Like to your dorm?" Maddox sounded slightly surprised.

"Yes, I think that's what 'over' covers."

"Aren't you studying?"

"Not right now," Jonathan said quickly. For some reason, he was holding his breath, so he needed to get out as many words as he could until he lost consciousness or something stupid like that. "But if you're busy--"

"Guess what? My schedule just cleared," Maddox replied just as fast.

"Good."

"Good."

"I'm coming."

"Happy to hear it."

"I'll say it again. And again. Once I'm with you."

"Oh."

"I'll be there soon."

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

Jonathan threw the phone on the bed and clasped his hands. He had done it, placed a freaking booty call to the sexiest boy on campus. Obviously, he was out of his mind, but those were details, and he wouldn't bother with them at the moment. Maddox was clear about his intentions. Was his ass even able…? Jonathan touched his backside gingerly. All right, so he hadn't thought this through. Was there a rule about how long you were supposed to wait for another romp in the hay after losing your anal virginity?

He ran his hands over his face. It wasn't like him to be so rash. But he had invited Maddox over, and that meant that he had to suck it up. It wasn't Maddox's fault that Jonathan had extended such an overt invitation. They were hooking up, that had been a booty call, hence Jonathan's ass was up for a—

He didn't dare to think further than that. A cursory look around the room convinced him that there was nothing he could do to make it look more orderly. But how would he go about protecting his ass after getting Maddox's hopes up like that? Maybe he would offer multiple blowjobs, he thought, as he began to dry his hair.

***

Nothing made him happier than having Jonathan initiate a hot meetup for a change. So far, the guy had played it cool, even while admitting he had it bad for Maddox, which meant that whatever was happening right now was a total win. Just thinking of those beautiful lips stretched over his—

All right, he needed to keep it in his pants until he got there.

"Where are you going in such a hurry?" Kane asked as he jumped down the stairs two at a time.

"To Jonathan's."

"Should we order dinner for you, too?"

"Nah, don't bother. I'm sleeping over," Maddox replied, convinced that it was exactly how things would happen. In case Jonathan kicked him out, he would sleep on the doormat and scratch at the door while mewling forlornly. He knew it would work from the many cat videos he'd seen in his life. Jonathan would have no choice but to take him back to bed.

Superb plan. He was known for those. As soon as he was outside the house, after a hurried bye to Kane, he willed himself to walk instead of run. It took a lot of his willpower to do so, but he needed to focus on preserving his stamina if he wanted to play with Jonathan for as long as his dick demanded.

***

"Hi, Ray of sunshine," he said as soon as Jonathan's roommate opened the door.

Ray beamed at him. "His room is over there." He leaned forward and gave Maddox a conspiratorial wink. "I have really good headphones, noise cancelling and all that. So consider I'm not even here."

Maddox grinned. "Good to know. You're a great roommate."

"Great roommate is my middle name… names?"

"Whatever you say, buddy," Maddox said and moved quickly past Ray to reach Jonathan's door. He couldn't slow down if it cost him everything.

After a short knock, he let himself in. Jonathan was completely naked and in the middle of the room, looking a bit confused.

"Wow!" Maddox walked over to him and grabbed him by the waist. "I guess any misunderstandings must be out of the way."

"Ugh, yeah, I don't know," Jonathan said, and their lips connected. "You're to blame."

"What for?" Maddox asked as he brushed his lips along Jonathan's mouth.

"I was thinking of you and forgot to get dressed."

"No problem. The way I see it, you saved us some precious moments." Maddox didn't hesitate and pushed Jonathan toward the bed.

It was narrower than his, but it would do in a pinch, he decided as he aligned his entire body with Jonathan's leaner frame. He would never forget how well they fit together. Maddox could feel a thrumming sensation under his fingertips everywhere he touched. Suddenly, he no longer wanted to hurry and let one hand wander over Jonathan's chest while enjoying the scent of some expensive body wash which the guy must have used recently.

The rise and fall that came with Jonathan's breathing made his drop in synch, as well. So eager to find release, his dick in too much overdrive, Maddox realized that he had never taken the time so far to explore Jonathan from up close.

"Um, what's happening?" Jonathan's voice was anxious with unhidden want.

"What do you mean?" Maddox asked while he brushed his knuckles along the other's firm jawline.

"I thought you'd jump me the moment you were inside my room."

Maddox let out a short chuckle. "Did you?"

"Yeah, that's basically your MO. Our MO."

"At least you're not placing all the blame on me."

"How could I?" Jonathan ran one hand through Maddox's hair, pushing it away from his eyes. "I'm totally nuts about your sexy body."

Maddox pouted. "Am I nothing but a sexual object to you?"

Jonathan laughed, pleased with the teasing he seemed to be in charge of. "I'd say this is a booty call, so, yeah, maybe I do that, as wrong as it might be."

Maddox took in the amber eyes, the straight nose, the lips curved in an unrestrained smile. "I've never had anyone like you."

Shadows drifted over the beautiful eyes. "A guy?"

"I don't mean that. What I mean is that…" Maddox hesitated for a moment, searching for the right words because he had never done such a thing before, "you're deep, there's something in your eyes that makes me feel full like I'm about to choke if I don't touch you, and when you smile, everything's real."

Jonathan's face morphed into a softer version, and a new twinkle appeared in his eyes. "Wow, I had no idea you could wax poetic."

"You're making me do the unthinkable."

"I do?"

"Yes." Maddox shifted a little and let his forehead rest against Jonathan's head. This way, they couldn't stare at each other, but they would be even more intimate if that were possible. "I want to touch you so much, and yet not to touch you at the same time."

"Oh." The single syllable dropped, and with it, Maddox could tell Jonathan's insecurity was rearing its head.

"Don't be so disappointed. The part of me that wants you always wins."

He took Jonathan's lips between his, teasing them slowly. Wandering hands traveled down his back, reaching for the hem of his t-shirt and pushing it up. They rested on his skin, soft like feathers. Maddox could feel Jonathan's desire to touch him, just as great as his.

When had he ever felt like this? Sex was pleasure, it was about getting it right and then some, and, of course, about coming. But this, this was different. Maddox wished they could stay like this for a while, how long he didn't know exactly, but wanted this to last.

Jonathan gasped as Maddox went for the side of his neck and began to bite him playfully, but with soaring desire. Yes, everything this guy did or let out of him, the slightest grunt, felt like lovemaking.

Maddox had a sudden urge to taste more, feel more. Their mouths came together like two halves of a whole, and the flavor of longing he found there overtook him. Yeah, Jonathan was right. He wasn't the type to wax poetic, but ever since they had met, he was no longer himself completely, or maybe he was just more than he had ever been.

"I love your kisses," Jonathan breathed out once they pulled apart.

"I love your mouth," Maddox replied and brushed his thumb over Jonathan's bottom lip, full and swollen now, redder than before and moist from all the kissing.

Jonathan bit on said lip, probably unconsciously, not knowing that he was provoking Maddox to bite it, too, devour it until its owner begged to be spared.

"You're too dressed," Jonathan said suddenly.

"Yeah, clearly." Maddox straightened up and shed his t-shirt. Beneath him, Jonathan was staring, his eyes shining, while taking in the scene in front of him. Maddox knew he was a bit vain, but none of the appreciation he'd ever gotten before compared to what he could read now in Jonathan's eyes.

Too bad he had to move away to remove his jeans, but Jonathan surprised him by pushing him on his back and helping him out of the rest of his clothes with determination. Maddox gasped as their roles were reversed, and now it was Jonathan on top, kissing him hungrily.

Their cocks touched, and it felt so incredibly teasing that Maddox would swear he got goose bumps everywhere. Could it be that Jonathan wanted to be on top for a change? Maddox sensed his pulse quickening. Not that he hadn't fantasized about it before, but maybe he needed a bit of mental preparation first.

He was slightly disappointed when Jonathan went down on him. His disappointment didn't last long since a warm mouth was all around his cock, swallowing it like it was nothing.

"Fuck, you're so good," Maddox whispered as Jonathan took him deep and fast. A blowjob was a good way to take the edge off, for sure. Then, without a doubt, Jonathan would start getting real about topping him.

He didn't stop to think about it since the sensations in his cock and balls were too intense for that. Jonathan was playing with his balls while taking him down his throat like an expert, and it felt like his life depended on getting all the juice out of them.

Maddox couldn't last long, not after that day and all his dreaming of that gorgeous mouth doing such amazing things to him. "Oh, fuck, take it, babe," he whispered and gripped the coverlet, using all his willpower not to lift his hips off the bed and choke Jonathan.

He crashed so hard after that. He could barely breathe and his chest felt full. Jonathan released his cock slowly from his mouth but he continued to lick it gently and pepper his balls and thighs with tiny kisses.

Jonathan surely loved his body, and if Maddox had anything to do with it, he would love a lot more about him. For now, it was something to work with.

"Kiss me," he ordered.

Jonathan raised his head and stared at him. "I just sucked you off."

"And? How's that a problem? Come here."

The other obeyed, but with a small annoyed huff.

"Don't worry," Maddox said, "my cock's all yours. You can do whatever you want with it."

"Big words," Jonathan replied and chuckled.

"I just want to kiss you," Maddox insisted, and soon, the lips he enjoyed so much were over his, making him taste cum and desire. "Fuck, you're turning me into a sex addict."

"How am I doing that? And weren't you the king of hookups already?" Jonathan protested.

"Yeah, but it feels like I only used to eat bread 'cause I was plain hungry, and now I'm having the most delicious cake in the universe and I cannot get enough."

"You're such a player," Jonathan said and laughed. "No wonder everyone thinks you're it."

"I mean it," Maddox insisted and frowned a little.

Jonathan pressed his fingers against the crease in his forehead, smoothing it out slowly. "It's all right. I think exactly the same."

Maddox wanted to tell him that it wasn't like that, Jonathan wasn't just one of many, but the words resting on the tip of his tongue eager to get out had to be stopped. Actions were stronger than words, and he didn't like being ignored in his efforts to prove his true intentions. So he turned the tables on Jonathan, catching him underneath his chin and biting his neck hard. Then, ignoring the other's soft pleas, he moved downward, biting and kissing the firm pecs, stopping only for a moment to tease the cute belly button. With one last lick of his lips, he dove in and took Jonathan's cock in his mouth.

There was something rewarding about hearing the other's breath hitch, his gasps and moans, while his cock grew harder and harder. Maddox felt it against the roof of his mouth but didn't care. He used a lot of tongue since he was no deepthroater and teased the head and underside until Jonathan became so vocal that Maddox worried that Ray's noise cancelling headphones might not prove strong enough. At the same time, Jonathan's hands were in his hair, pulling hard at it. Even that felt arousing and Maddox had to push his cock into the bed to calm it down.

He pulled away. "Give me a facial," he ordered.

The amber eyes grew wide in disbelief.

"Come on," he goaded, "all over my face," as he pumped the other's cock harder and harder.

Jonathan groaned and threw his head back. Maddox barely had time to close his eyes, as the first rope of cum hit him.

He laughed when it was over and licked his lips. His eyes were still closed, so he yelped when a warm tongue came down on his closed right eyelid.

"Damn, you're such a fine shooter," he commended while Jonathan licked his face like an eager dog.

"And you're crazy," a gruff voice replied.

***

They lay on his narrow bed, glued together at the shoulder. Jonathan loved how warm and solid Maddox's body felt so close to his, the sound of his breathing, and the scent of his skin. Their hands linked together like it was the most natural thing in the world.

"You didn't have dinner, did you?" Jonathan asked, to fill the silence. If it went on for too long, he might end up saying crazy things, so it was better to settle for the mundane.

"Nope."

"I'll make something for the three of us. Oh, gawd, do you think Ray heard us?" he asked, suddenly alarmed.

"He told me about his awesome headphones."

Jonathan blushed. Maddox and Ray talked about such things like they were completely normal. Was he the only one who felt embarrassed?

"I'll help," Maddox said and caressed the inside of his palm with his rough fingers.

"In the kitchen? I don't need it," Jonathan replied.

"Doesn't matter. I'll come watch you."

"You could just chill in my room."

"Yeah, but I might end up humping your pillow because it smells like you," Maddox said promptly. "Are you sure you want to sleep on a pillow covered with cum?"

Jonathan wasn't sure he would mind that at all, but instead he said, "Okay, no. But I warn you, our kitchen is really small."

"I'll try to sit in a corner and not bother you. Are you going to cook naked?"

Jonathan snorted, barely keeping in a laugh. "I have a roommate."

"Right. Put some clothes on, now."

Maddox began to push him out of the bed.

"Whoa, whoa, I'm doing it," he protested.

Being self-conscious more often than not was normal for him, but it was different being watched by Maddox while he put on a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants.

"I had no idea reverse striptease could be so hot."

He stared at his guest. Maddox was biting his lips, his eyelids dropped half-way, one hand on his half-hard cock. "You're something," he mumbled, not knowing how to take that new teasing. "And come on, you need to dress, too. I hope you don't intend to eat naked."

"Why not?" Maddox challenged him. "Ray is a totally cool guy. And I feel awesome in my own skin."

"Seriously? So you can be naked around my roommate, but I cannot?"

"I'm jealous, you're not. That's the difference," Maddox said matter-of-factly.

"You got Hanna and Ray together. What reason could you still have to be jealous of him still?"

"It's not about Ray. It's about everyone. I'm the only one who's supposed to see you naked."

"Ah, then you might not like to hear that I practically showed Rusty my cock and balls," Jonathan said promptly. The last thing he needed was to have any more misunderstandings.

"You did what?" Maddox jumped out of the bed.

"Don't fret so much. I wanted to shock him a little since he believes he's the only one who can do that."

Maddox crowded him, pushing him against the wall. "Jonathan Hamilton, are you secretly an exhibitionist?" His pretty eyes were twinkling.

"No, but I told you. I wanted to give Rusty a little of his own medicine."

"Did it work?"

"Maybe, I'm not completely sure."

"How much did he see?"

"As I said, the whole thing."

"What? Like your ass, too?"

"No," Jonathan protested. So maybe, just maybe, it hadn't been wise to let Maddox know about this, and now he was clearly being made fun of. "I just flaunted my junk for like a second to put him in place."

"A second only? Are you sure?"

"Maybe two seconds? I don't know. Wait, you're not getting jealous of Rusty, too, are you?"

"I'm jealous of everyone who breathes the same air as you."

"You're either nuts, or you enjoy making fun of me."

Maddox got closer and closer, until Jonathan was plastered against the wall and their noses touched. The situation was a bit unnerving, until Maddox started laughing. "I bet he pissed his pants," he said.

"I don't think so, but I did shock him a little. He might have changed his opinion of me."

Maddox made a sudden move and bit his nose.

"Ouch! What was that for?"

"You're not allowed to flaunt your junk in front of anyone."

"For real? It's my junk." Jonathan grunted as Maddox grabbed his crotch and squeezed. It wasn't at all unpleasant, but he really needed to start cooking, or they would be forced to have a very late dinner.

"No, it's not," Maddox countered. "And this is yours." He took Jonathan's hand and placed it over his cock.

Jonathan wrapped his fingers around Maddox's manhood, filling his hand with it. "Sounds like a fair deal," he whispered.

Maddox kissed him slowly. "I sure hope so. I'm starving, though. We could always order in. You don't have to slave in the kitchen."

Jonathan snorted. "People so mistakenly think it's hard work, but it's not. And I like it."

"Then if it's so great, you'll let me help?" Maddox asked.

The only thing missing was a wagging tail.

"Sure, I'll find something for you to do," he promised.

"Good. Let's go."

"Hey, aren't you forgetting something? Get dressed," Jonathan ordered.

Maddox pushed himself away and began dressing, making a show out of it. Jonathan closed his eyes for a moment.

"Can I sleep here tonight?"

The question caught him off-guard. "Sure, if you want."

They wouldn't get a lot of sleep, obviously, but Jonathan wasn't willing to send Maddox back to his place for the world. Their month together was bound to fly by too quickly, so making the most out of it was the best course of action.

"I want. I just need to know, do you?"

Jonathan took Maddox by the shoulders and kissed him, short and sweet, on the lips. "Without a doubt."

The gorgeous smile he got for that was the only reward that mattered.

TBC