CHAPTER FIVE

The first movement were my eyes watering with tears, the first tears in years. I had never felt so sorry for myself, so useless like a log just sitting, watching the world go by without a care about everything but itself. I should have spoken up! I should have taken action! I should have-

“You should have but you didn’t” a familiar voice said and my eyes snapped open expecting to see the darkness, but I was in my room back at the building and seated in front of me was Rose with the most serious face I had ever seen and next to her was him, the beast of a man fidgeting in his seat avoiding my stare.

Rose cleared her throat averting my eyes from him to her, she smiled which started to turn to a smirk even her six-year-old self-looked terrifying with that face. She leaned forward and placed her arms out to support her weight.

“Enough about the past and the should have’s it had, it cannot be changed what’s done is done. Now, there’s something we can change, it is within our reach just waiting for us to grasp it” she said and I frowned as curiosity got the best of me, I waited for her to continue but all she did was stare back at me with that same smirk.

In a blink of an eye I was held against the wall, dangling like a vine in a tree and I locked eyes with the beast of a man who was strangling me. My throat started to hurt and my lungs burned from the lack of oxygen, my arms tried to peel off but he had an iron grip around my throat “Plea-please” I choked out as tears started to blind my vision.

My blurry eyes darted to Rose who was stood and watched without batting an eyelash “He-help me” I pleaded with her, she smiled sadly “It is not my life that’s at steak, it’s yours. So, why should I intervene?” she asked but did not wait for my answer as she spoke up “you have the power, yet you choose not to use it. It’s at the tip of your tongue waiting for you to spit it out, the pawn is in your grasp waiting for you to move it. Yet you choose to let it happen when you can make it happen. Life is a game Rose, its either you or them”

Suddenly images flashed through my mind as black dots started to dance in my vision; the first time I met the beast of a man, the time my legs and arms were cut off, the time he brought the other children, the time everyone abounded me, and the time the building collapsed.

Anger filled my core like no other. I was good. I did what was best for me because I knew that if I did anything the consequences would be on me. It was selfish, but it kept me alive. Everyone expected me to put them before myself, to put their happiness before my own, and their dreams before mine. We were all selfish to begin with, yet when I decided to be selfish I was considered a monster. How cruel!

With those thoughts, I finally let everything out and blue-green flames engulfed my body and spread to the beast of a man. He tried to let go, but I held him, his screams echoed through the room which filled me with a rush and a sadistic smile stretched on my face “How does it feel?! Isn’t the pain accelerating?!” I screamed in his face and I watched his body turn to ashes before my eyes.

That time, there was no Leon or the five masked people. It was me, I killed the beast, even if I felt like a small part of me died, it was bound to happen. I was going to kill everyone who hurt him and me. I knew that when I killed the beast that I became the beast.

My breath came out heavy and slow, my heart slapped against my rib cage, and my head seemed to spin, I felt like I was untouchable, submerged in water. The sound of someone clapping brought me out to the surface and I came face to face with a grinning Rose.

“The past cannot be changed but the future can, it’s yours for the taking,” she said walking towards me and snapped her fingers, and in the blink of an eye we were sitting across each other separated by a small table with a game of chess waiting for us to play.

Rose grabbed one black piece that had other seven identical ones in the same horizontal line each placed in black and white boxes. She moved it one box in front and sat back “The game has begun, it’s only a matter of time that you make a move. But remember one step at a time, we have all the time” she said.

I looked at the strange pieces, I knew the game was chess but I had no knowledge of how to play it “it seems you have forgotten but don’t worry, I’ll teach you how to play” she said cheerfully like I did not just kill a man minutes ago.

I should have felt guilty but as she said that the past cannot be changed. My face remained blank, but I felt at peace, the air felt much lighter. I could start afresh, but I still had things to do. People to talk to. To kill.

Rose moved the next piece and said “The world is the board, it’s people are the pawns or pieces, and you’re the hand that decides which piece gets out and which piece becomes a queen. Do you understand?” she asked waiting patiently for my answer.

I understood that day, the world is a doomed place and fate is cruel. We all feel and desire, we’re all selfish that we don’t care about the other, that what makes us ‘us’. So, what if we turned our emotions off and put aside our desires? We would be at peace with ourselves and others.

But I wanted to bring chaos to the world, to make them feel so much that they could not take it anymore. One step at a time. The world will be in ruins. I want it to bleed the way I bled.

I looked directly into her eyes that were as blue as the sky compared to my dark brown ones and gave her the answer that brought the Malien race and humanity to their knees.

“Yes, I understand”