chapter 17

𝙏𝘼𝙍𝘼'𝙎 𝙋𝙊𝙑

" I have ptsd " I said. He was just about to put food in his mouth but stopped after hearing this. I can surely say that he was shocked by this information.

"urmmm" he cleared his throat. "Why are you telling this to me " he asked. Well I didn't expected him to ask me this. Because almost everybody's reaction on this statement was pity looks or sympathy.

"Well we are gona get married I don't want any secret between us. There are very less people who know the incident behind this so i want you to know about me. I don't know if this marriage will work or not and hell I don't even know anything about you" I said.

He was listening to me sincerely. " I was in 8th standard. I was very shy, naive and introvert kind of person I didn't had many friends. My bade papa ( uncle ) kids were in same school as I was. That school was the worst time period of my life. My brother was in different school as he and his friends decided. That's when there really color started showing. My bade papa's ( uncle) son and his group used to bully me and used to call me names. But that was not the problem I somehow avoided them but.. " I took a deep breath. I eyes got watered. Suddenly there was a hand that pressed my hand lightly encouraging me to continue.

"One day I was last one to leave the school as I was in library. I was just crossing the corridor. A hand came out of nowhere and started pulling me in the empty classroom and there my uncle's son and his group. They started beating me and his girlfriend was laughing at me like this all was just a fun to her. They all locked the door and kept big rat in the room. I was banging door like manic but no one was there. "

"My parents asked me what happened but I didn't say I single word. After that I was sent to psychiatrist. Though it wasn't a great help. From there I got to know about me being claustrophobic and ptsd. You know when I saw a girl maximum 6to 7 years old working at roadside selling balloons and had her small brother and sister with her. She was working for her both brother and sister. There many people who were talking and behaving to them very rudely but she didn't let her siblings suffer that. It's not just that one time I saw her she always used to stand there.

After that I decided I won't be like this, if that girl who doesn't even have that much family support can survive than, Me who doesn't have to feed my family I don't have that much responsibility so why am I being depressed just because they said some words and beat me. But after this incident I was no longer that shy girl. That incident made me strong" I said.

He had his jaw and fist clenched he had the expression as of controlling angry. "You know I have met many girls but I never came across a girl who could be so strong to come out of that depressed stage. I'm proud of you" he said.

"But why didn't you tell this to your family they should know this. And why did you tell me all this you only said that you don't know me ? " he said.

"I didn't want to have any conflict between two families and you know my father and uncle have some issues. And for your second answer I don't know why but I just feel like I could tell you anything. It is almost 15 years to that incident. This all had to go from my head. I feel so relief after telling you this" I said. He was still holding my hands.

"ok ok now no more emotional topic so, I don't except you to tell me your secret . But let's do the thing we came here for decisions of conditions right " I said with a smile. He smiled back at me. I swear I never saw something more beautiful before than his smile. I have always seen him with serious mode.

I took out the paper were I wrote my conditions of course I won't get stamp paper. I don't want anyone to know about our conditions.

"so first point

I will continue working after we get married " I said. He had this big frown on his face.

"Why do you need to work when your soon to be husband can earn enough for you, me and my siblings" he said. " I know you can but I just don't want to be addressed as your wife atleast I should have my own identity. All my life I was known by my father's name but now that I have a chance I want to know by who I am" I said.

"Ok fine I said yes only because I also want my sister to be independent and everyone should know her for who she originally is " he said.

"Second my parents will be still my first priority . They did so many sacrifice for me I don't want to let them down " I said. His eyes showed some emotions of disapproval or irritation I just couldn't get that but he soon recovered.

" Fine " he said in husky voice. I swear his voice is the best thing that I ever heard this makes me shiver slightly.

"Third we won't hide anything from each other yeah I know for starting you would not be comfortable but you know marriage life is not easy. Listening and talking in short communication in a relationship is the most important thing. You know why there are complications in relationship because they do not communicate." I said.

He smiled and shacked his head from side to side "You know this is the first time someone is putting conditions in front of me because I am always the one to order this feels odd. As in good. Ok I will try to share everything with you " he said.

"Nobody would force me to cook. sorry to say this but I'm not very good at making food. I can only make basic things" I said.

"Of course no one is going to force you to do anything you don't like so don't worry about much" he said.

I was really feeling reliefed after that. Now my last conditions God how do I say that, I know after this he will be surely get shocked. I know every husband atleast except some basic things from his wife.

"Last condition We won't be consummating our marriage..." I said.

"𝗪𝗛𝗔𝗧"