382. Despicable
His crewmates' cheesy skill names make Buggy get distracted. He gets slashed by Shiki's left sword leg right in the neck. His head flies off, but there's no blood whatsoever coming out of the cut. Buggy's reflex is so great that he could split himself even when getting distracted.
"Damn, what a monster," says Shiki.
"Oh, you finally say something after being all serious for a while," says Buggy while reattaching his head.
"I just wanted to concentrate and it really makes me feel so much better now. My old self is slowly returning to me, the one who was thirsty for blood and victory," says Shiki while grinning wildly and panting.
Buggy is silent for a moment and says, "Yeah, you sure look thirsty. Wanna drink some water first?"
Tick marks appear on Shiki's head before he says, "That's it, I'll kill you."
Shiki then attacks Buggy again who now decides to play his crewmates' game. He gets into a Crane Stance while holding his swords. Then he shouts an attack name he has just thought of on the spot.
"ULTIMATE TECHNIQUE! UNLIMITED BLADE WORKS: DANCE OF THE MIGHTY MAGNIFICENT SUPREME CRANE GOD OF THE LIMITLESS MARTIAL SWORD PEAKS UNDER THE RAYS OF BLOOD MOONLIGHT IN A RAINY NIGHT!" shouts Buggy with a very serious expression.
His skill name & pose stuns his crewmates and even Shiki. Not only it's long, but it's also ridiculous it impresses them so much. Everyone even needs to stop what they're doing just to comprehend what Buggy just said.
Then suddenly, *BAM*, Buggy kicks Shiki's jaw from below and shouts, "DON'T GET DISTRACTED IN A BATTLE!"
Everyone else has the same expression that says, 'Dude, you are the one who distracted him. And your attack should be a sword attack, not a kick.'
Buggy knows this too, but he just doesn't care as long as his skill name becomes the best. Surely that name is the best currently because everyone was stunned by it. The Clowns who finally realized it now start to think of more ridiculous names & moves again.
They are beating up the Golden Lion Pirates using ridiculous attacks with ridiculous names. These guys are too focused on competing for the most ridiculous things that they forget they are in a war. Poor Golden Lion Pirates just become their punching bags.
Shiki is angry, but he can't do anything about it because his hands are full. He has the most difficult opponent among everyone there, after all. So he can't help his comrades when he can't even help himself.
Buggy is attacking Shiki using some weird ass moves like those Chinese martial artists in badly drawn manhua while also saying weird ass cheesy skill names. His crewmates follow him and turn this war into the strangest war they've ever done.
Even Shiki who has gone through a lot more things than them is speechless now. Well, he can't really speak, to begin with, because Buggy keeps attacking him. Buggy uses weird and ineffective attacks, but he still can overwhelm Shiki and dominate the fight.
So now Shiki isn't just speechless, he is also very confused. Buggy's attacks are strange and ineffective, but he can't defend against any of them. His decades of experience seem to be worthless in this situation.
But well, even with those kinds of moves, Buggy's skills and power are just too great. He can always change his trajectory while attacking to surprise Shiki. His power can also break Shiki's defense because he is still far stronger than Shiki even though most of Shiki's skills have returned.
"Moon Splitting Blade Slash Cut Chop!" says Buggy while slashing downward after doing a frontflip.
"Stab of 1000 Years of Death!" says Buggy while trying to stab Shiki's asshole from behind with his sword.
"Sea Crushing Splash Hit Flashy Dropkick!" says Buggy while dropping from a few meters above the ground.
"Ultimate Move of Destroying Family Tree!" says Buggy while sending a kick toward Shiki's balls.
Shiki screams many times because Buggy often aims at some dangerous parts like his balls. He has fought many people who used dirty tricks, but Buggy is just straight-up despicable. His little thing is barely functioning at his age, but it still works sometimes, so he doesn't want Buggy to make it stops working completely.
Buggy laughs evilly when Shiki yells angrily at him about aiming at the PeePee. He is a Clown, so he is a very mischievous man, it's a must-have trait for a Clown, based on himself. So seeing Shiki becomes overly worried about it makes Buggy wants to keep doing it.
That's why Buggy now changes his attacks and targets the forbidden spots. Dingdong, back hole, eyes, and even ears have become his targets now. Buggy doesn't hold back to fight dirty anymore and starts using tricks.
Spraying pepper onto Shiki's eyes, screaming as loud as he can right in Shiki's ears, pulling Shiki's pants down, farting on Shiki's face, grabbing Shiki's feet and stomping on his crotch while Shiki is busy with the pepper spray and fart smell, and then Buggy even inserts a stick into Shiki's back hole.
..... It's not even a dirty fight anymore, it's just nasty, very very nasty. Everyone else who sees Buggy does all of that can only watch in shock. He laughs while torturing the old Shiki like a psychopath.
Shiki passes out even though Buggy hasn't really injured his body that much. The mental damage is just too high that his body has just given up too. He has been played, shamed, and disgraced in this battle.
"Is he dead?" asks Cricket.
"He surely is. Even I will kill myself if I were in his situation," says Enel.
"Damn, he just gets too much Emotional Damage," says Palu.
"Yohohoho, dead by Emotional Damage. If I died like that, then I won't return for my 2nd life because I would be too embarrassed," says Brook.
"Yeah, and you surely don't want to meet the psycho that killed you in such a way. The trauma will just be too much," says Manba.
Everyone nods in agreement while they look at Buggy laughing like a maniac as he steps on Shiki's body. He gets into whatever character he's playing too much.
"Well as long as he wins," says Magnus.
"But, isn't this bad?" asks Jude.
"What do you mean?" asks Palu.
"She means that if Shiki passes out, won't his power that keeps these islands floating will disappear too?" asks Jude.
Silence falls and even Buggy stops laughing after hearing that. They were enjoying this war too much they forget about this very important thing.
"Damn, we're fucked," says Buggy right before the islands start falling.
The remaining Golden Lion Pirates are panicking while The Clown Pirates are just sighing. Buggy then orders Enel to find Ruff and checks if he has finished their plan. Enel closes his eyes and turns into a lightning bolt before disappearing.
Ruff and his team have gone to do something since the war started. They never join the fight because they have a very important task. The scientists' job is to prepare things to save the living beings on these islands when they fall, especially the natives of these islands who were forced to be here.
While Enel goes to find Ruff, Buggy is trying to wake Shiki up by slapping the old guy's face back and forth many times. Cricket & Palu help him by pouring water on Shiki's face, but the old guy just doesn't want to wake up.
"This old dude is a strong sleeper," says Cricket nonchalantly.
"Yeah, he might be in the afterlife already when he wakes up," says Buggy.
"We too," says Palu.
The conscious Golden Lion Pirates are stunned by how they can talk to each other so calmly in this situation. They will die in a minute or so, yet the Clown Pirates are very calm. Little did they know, the Clown Pirates have gone through worse things, so this is not that scary.
______________________________________________
You can read up to 35+35 chapters ahead of my fanfics and more pictures on my Pa_treon page if you are interested.
Voting for this book is highly appreciate. Cover image is the MC, artist's ig: @fatmaqn_
I've uploaded:
1. Chapter 406 of Fairy Tail: Sun Eater
2. Chapter 417 of Transcended as Lord Buggy
3. Pictures of both stories (ex: bounty poster & magazine cover) by fatmaqn_
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