Chapter 13

I'm walking through a large field of wild flowers, beautiful pinks and reds with flashes of violet are dancing in a breeze with a faint glow of yellow in the air from the glorious sun that is shining down from the clear blue sky. I can hear running water, like a brook or a stream in the distance and the air has a gentle scent of freshly cut grass hanging on it.

Calmness. Serenity. Peace. This is what I feel. I hear my Daughter laughing, her sweet little giggle echoes through the valley we are in and my heart feels like it is floating. A wide smile fills my face and my cheeks hurt, a sure sign of happiness and contentment.

I hear Namjoon's voice, it's calling for Jangmi. He sounds upset. The electric blue is quickly swallowed up with grey storm clouds and it begins to rain. The flowers stop dancing and begin wilting like the droplets hitting them are acid. Thunder rolls across the sky and a bolt of lightening hits a tree off in the distance. It catches fire which spreads and encircles me. I hear Namjoon still calling for our baby girl but her laughter has disappeared.

A huge black stallion gallops towards me with a cloaked rider who disembarks in an impressive move and lands at my feet. Fear is all I feel now. The ominous being clamps a hand over my mouth and holds a knife to my neck. "You have got to go" it says and the blade disappears into my skin.

"Fuck" I shout as I sit up in bed, sweat pouring from me. I'm terrified and my heart is beating so fast. I've woken Namjoon and probably the rest of the house too. He turns to me and asks in a panicked voice "are you ok? What happened?" I can't speak, my mouth won't work, I'm trembling. He switches the bed side lamp on and as he does Jimin rushes in the room. "What happened? Are you both ok?" It's sweet that he is concerned but I feel bad for waking him. Hot tears now form in my eyes and the sting makes me blink them out.

Namjoon puts his arm around me and pulls me into him, I rest my head on his chest. "I think it was a bad dream Jimin" he says beginning to stroke my hair. My little happy bundle of joy pops himself down on the bed next to me, concern all over his face, not a bundle of joy at all in this moment. He starts to rub my feet, he too knows this seems to have a soothing affect on me.

"Gwihan, what was the dream about?" Jimin asks using what has now become just a pet name for me. Well, that's my understanding of it. When he first called me that it had the promise to mean so much more. My heart has begun to relax and I have feeling back in my throat and lips so manage to form a sentence. "It was the same cloaked figure as the night Jangmi was taken".

Both of them look at me puzzled, up until this point I hadn't mentioned the nightmare that had woken me alerting me to the fact she was gone. I reach up and touch Joonie's face, I slowly graze my fingernails over his ear and through his hair and when I get to the back of his neck I move upward  and pull him down to kiss his mouth, I don't want to talk about that right now. He touches my shoulder and delicately traces his thumb down my upper arm to my elbow and pulls it up and wraps it around his neck to join my other. His kiss deepens and I think he might have forgotten we have an audience as I feel him press his chest against me and his breath shift.

"I will leave you two alone, Aimee we can talk in the morning" Jimin says sensing we may need this bit of time alone. He pats my leg and I hear his little feet pad across the floor and the door close behind him. We sink down into the pillows and carry on kissing and stroking each other, it doesn't progress past that, but it doesn't need to. It's an intimate connection that we are craving as a distraction from our pain. A way to make us both feel something other than emptiness. Hoping we can for a few moments swap that to warmth and love with a subtle pleasure.