I'm still Broken, Anneliese.

Chapter 7

Two AM in the morning and I can't still sleep peacefully. My mind won't rest and think hastely. I am bothered these days of our little argument. Me and Hanz does not talk anymore. Though we eat together but still we're not talking. I sat on my bed and trying to calm myself to not overthink. I reach my phone on side table and dial Aliyah's phone number, few seconds she answers it.

"Why are you calling so early? It's 2am." She asked curiously.

"Uhm sorry uhm you know--"

"Did you two fight?" My tongue choke whenever I hear the word fight.

"Ye yeah." I faintly said. She let out a deep sigh before saying anything.

"Stop overthink, Anne. It's normal. You've been together for almost three years and this is not your first time that you had a fight."

"But still I'm afraid he doesn't want me anymore."

"That's what you want right? You want him free you to your marriage."

"Yeah."

"Then, why are you affected? You must be happy now."

"I don't know, Ali. I'm happy but I'm also sad about it. The thought that we will part ways my heart can't take it."

"Anny, you loved him. It just that you're in denial. Since then, I know very well that you love him."

"I'm not Ali. I want to free him and find a suited woman for him. You know I married him because of money."

"Then, you're throwing out my cousin, Anne? Just because you already achieved your goal. You--" I cut her off because of his straightforwardness.

"What? Ali I'm not. I'm not using hanz--"

"Admit or not you are using Hanz, Anneliese. That man loves you so much and you can't even thank him. I'm not saying you force yourself to love him back. But Anny, try to open your heart. I swear to you Hanz need you the most. He married you because he find light in you."

" What do you mean?"

" Anny, you don't know much of my cousin. So, please. Stay with him. Don't let go of him. I beg you." Shocked of the words aliyah's utter and here I am still confuse why.

"Do you know something, I didn't know, Ali?" I asked. She cleared her throat calming herself.

"No, nothing. It just that my cousin loves you and I want him to be happy."

"Alright, alright."

"Thanks, Anny. Love you!"

"Thank you for answering my call, Ali."

"Hahaha of course, I'm your best friend. No friends can withstand their friend when need helps"

"Yeah right. Why are you awake at 2am? It's not that you're asleep-- your voice doesn't sound sleepy. "

"Oh! I was reviewing one subject. You know I hate familiarisation and memorization so I'm stuck."

"That's bad. See ya later, then?"

"Yeaaah, seeya! Bye Anny."

"Morning, Alicakes and seeya later"

Morning came and I'm done with the taking a bath. I'm now preparing my sling bag putting all the things I need, especially I secure my black pen which need to be use later to our exam.

I change clothes, apply simple make up and there you have it. I'm done. Went straight to the kitchen I found Manang Terra preparing the food.

"Hi, Manang." I said and kiss her cheek.

"Hello, iha. Wake up Hanz to his room. He doesn't feel good last night." After I heard the word utter I rushly went to his room. As I open the door I found him trying to wear his shirt. He's having hard time.

"Why are you here?" He spoke first. Feeling shy about our situation. I shyly answer him.

"Uhmm, Manang told me to wake up since you are not feeling good since last night."

"Yeah, I can't move my arms that much. So I'm having hard time wearing my shirt." I walk closer to him and stop inches away. I stop him from struggling putting his shirt.

"Stop. Let me do it." He met my eyes before looking away. I cleared my throat because of embarrassment. I instructed him to put his hands in the air and I'll do the rest. 10 seconds of silence deaf my ears. Only our breathing can be heard and I'm not complaining. Roll down the shirt to finish I can feel his eyes staring at me and  I don't have the courage to look back.

"I'm sorry." He started. Not minding what he said I pull down the shirt and step back inches away.

"Done. Come down stairs let's eat now." I was about to walk away but he hold my hand softly stopping me from going.

"I..i.. I'm sorry of what I've done. It's not my intention to hurt you."

"Yeah. That's okay."

"Anneliese, I don't want to lost you. I've love you so much that my heart aches whenever I hurt you. Anneliese, it's hurt here." pointing his heart. I stare at him and cup my hands to his face. Man, this man is so fragile and gentle.

"Hanz, you don't have to worry. Okay? I won't leave you and forget about the fight we had last's days." He nodded and hug me. I hug him back.

"Okay, let's go. Let's eat we'll be late."

"Okay, wait. I will get my wallet and pen."

"Huh? How about your car key?"

"Annieliese, I can't drive. Give me a lift." He smirk after he said that and march the door. He's back again being this attitude.

**

After I give Hanz a lift because he can't drive. Club members and students from campus tease us about our relationship. Yeah, not all know about us. I mean us being married and what they know Hanz pursue me. That's what many people knew.

"Okay, get one and pass." My Prof said and hand the exam papers. Our chairs and table is one meter away each other. Front and back, side to side. While answering the exam I notice in the window it's raining. I stop answering for awhile and admire the scenery of rain. I really love the rain this is where I met Hanz.

"Miss Carnaval." back to reality someone called me.

"Uhm yes"

"You're too busy admiring the rain. Finish your exam first the time is running." Said by my professor . I nod at her and continue answering. It's not that hard to answer since I study all the coverage.

After the Bell ring I stand up and change the sit position. Every time we change professor or subject we change sit position in clock wise to avoid cheating. Second subject, third subject and fourth subject was finish after 3pm. I stretch my back and get my bag in my chair and stand up. It's thirty three pm and I was so immersed of what I'm doing and I forget to eat lunch. Yeah, it was raining and I'm tired to get lunch so I stay in the room and scan my notes until the exam begin. Out of the room in front of Architecture Building soccer field face me. I saw a man standing during the rain. I focus my gaze to him and analyse who is this person but what shock me is its Hanz. What the heck he is doing. It's raining hard and I don't know what he thinks. Before I rushly go to him. I put back my bag in the room and running to him. He is there just standing and looking up the sky which covered by dark clouds.

"What the heck are you doing, hanz?" I raise my voice a little. The rain is hard and I need to raise my voice. So that he can hear me. Startled of my voice and what he saw. He spoke after seconds.

"Why are you here, Anneliese?" I give him a question face.

"Not me but you. What are you doing here idiot?"

"Admiring the rain, I think. "

"Don't give me that crap, Hanz. Are you nuts? You'll catch a cold. Let's go! " I drag him out of the field but he's strong and can't budge.

"Hanz! Are you planning to die? The rain is not stopping. Let's go!"

" Well, do you remember, Anneliese."

"What??"

"This where I ask you to marry me, right?"

"Yeah, I remember it like yesterday."

"But you answer no, Anneliese. My heart was broken back then."

" I'm sorry. I was just startled of what you said."

"Yeah, I know right and I'm still broken, Anneliese."