I have a dilemma

Paris, Summer 2020 France

No—

It did not matter. I had to forget all that, and focus only on what I cared about most. I left the hotel an hour ago and I was already dying from desire to see her.

"I have a dilemma, Sasakawa. I really want to retire." The words came out fast and passionate. "I know it will not be easy, I have not thought it out fully. But it's what I desire. I want to end this life."

I wrung my hands so hard I almost pulled out my fingers. I felt I had come up against an invisible barrier, but I also felt I was able to cross it and move forward.

"Anyway, it's not fair! We cannot allow a situation to remain unresolved. We must solve it. You said there was another victim," he said, thoughtfully. "There may even be a connection between the two? A rapist? A killer? A serial killer who wanders the streets of Paris?" His voice was reproachful; he had doubt and his head was going from right to left.