Chapter Seven

It was some minutes to two pm, Sheenah was making her way to their room, grinning and blushing like a lovestruck teenager. She opened the door and found the girls laughing at something. "Hey." She greeted, removing her shoes.

"Hey," they all replied, their interest now shifting to Sheenah.

"You look happy." Lilly observed.

"She just came from a date Lilly, she's supposed to look happy."

"It's not guaranteed Tamara." Lilly retorted back, annoyance in her voice.

"Anyway, how was it?" Kendy asked, tired of the bickering of the two.

"It was fun." Sheenah answered, settling herself on her bed, feeling relief. Everyone was quiet, the other girls waiting for more elaboration and Sheenah waiting for normal conversation to resume.

"That's all?" Kendy asked, disappointed.

"Huh?"

"Come on Shee, we need elaboration on the fun." Lilly whined.

"Details girl." Tash added, settling on her bed too.

"Well, it's been too long since I've been on this going out thing that I've forgotten how all of you behave," Sheenah looked around, only to find her friends' gazes fixed on her, unfazed. "Wow, you all are something." She shook her head, before crossing her legs on her bed.

"We had breakfast, at this lovely place. We talked. Then we went for a walk on the beach and talked some more. He-"

"Wait, you went on the beach?!" Lilly accused.

"Yeah?" Sheenah answered, unsure. The other girls were looking at her like she was a betrayer.

"We had made a deal to go to the beach for the first time together! You broke the deal." Lilly accused.

Just then Sheenah remembered the deal they had made on their flight, she cussed silently, feeling slightly bad for breaking it. It wasn't that much of a deal, was it?

"I'm sorry guys, I forgot. I was just carried away. Forgive me?" She pouted, but they all stared blankly. "I'll make it up to you." At this, the three smiled, and Sheenah sighed.

"While we wait for you to make it up to us, you can bless us with crisps." Lilly pleaded cheekily, biting her lower lip.

"Yes! Potato crisps, with chilly and lemon flavor. The jumbo pack." Kendy supported, battling her eyelashes which made Sheenah laugh.

"Yeah, I wouldn't mind the crunchy heaven right about now." Tash said.

"I'll see what I can do." Sheenah finished, unclasping her bra which felt suffocating. When it was done, she breathed in relief, before checking her phone for any messages or missed call.

"Weren't you girls supposed to be skiing or something?" Kendy asked, passing her fingers through her hair.

"It's scuba diving Kendy." Tash was quick to correct, "that reminds me, wanna join us Abigail?"

Sheenah gave Tash a glare, before declining. "I'll pass."

"Looks like you're stuck with me little girl."

Tash gave Lilly a stink eye. "Don't you dare call me that!" She then jumped on her, tackling her.

"You two should date each other." Kendy commented with a laugh, combing her hair.

"Ew, no, Tash's too stuck up." Lilly then turned to Tash, smiling, "no offense."

"None taken, and I think you are full of yourself."

"Look whose talking." Lilly replied, busy digging through her suitcase. They hadn't unpacked, and everything was in disarray.

"Uh...are we still joking?" Kendy asked, feeling a little tension in the room.

"Yeah, definitely. Aren't we?" Lilly's eyes were now on Tash.

"Whatever." She replied instead and Lilly smiled victoriously.

Everyone found something to do, Lilly was still busy with her suitcase, Kendy was combing her hair, Tash was scrolling through her phone and Sheenah was rubbing her feet, still waiting for a notification on her phone. Her stomach rumbled, and she laughed nervously.

"Guess I'm not the only one whose hungry, Sheenah wanna grab something?" Kendy offered, tying her hair in a neat bun.

"Yeah sure, but I'll need to take a quick shower first. I feel pretty sandy." She tried joking getting up.

"You feel what?" The other three asked at the same time.

"Sandy, you know when you feel like you have sand all over your body."

"Girl, you're bad at this, leave the joking to us." Tash teased cackling, which soon had the other girls cracking up also.

"Whatever." Sheenah said, heading to the shower.

Smiling.

"Well, we better head off now Lilly. And I have something that you'll definitely wanna hear." Tash winked.

"Oh," Lilly rubbed her palms,"I love me some tea." she winked back.

"Aren't you guys gonna eat?" Kendy asked, concerned.

"We'll grab something on our way."

They picked their essentials, before heading off, Lilly too eager to be told about the gossip.

"Have fun guys." Kendy yelled after them.

"Thanks K-Boo." Tash yelled back, which had Kendy wondering how bad Tash was with nicknames.

***

After a shower, Sheenah settled on a pair of denim jeans, and a floral top. She wore comfortable sandals, before leaving with Kendy. They both went to the hotel's restaurant. Sheenah looked through the menu, finding it hard to choose what she wanted to eat.

"What are you getting?" Sheenah asked Kendy.

"I was thinking of this prawn dish, but it's gonna dry my pocket," she joked, "so I'll just have biryani instead. It looks satisfying enough."

Sheenah remembered Kendy's financial strain plus her company's struggles and offered to pay for both their meals.

"No, that'd be-"

"Hey!" She cut her off, "you're my girl, it's nothing, plus you just gave me an idea of what to eat, so consider it my payment." Sheenah squeezed Kendy's hands briefly, then smiled and called for a waiter, ready to order.

While they were waiting for their food, Kendy asked. "So when are we, I mean when I'm I meeting your man? Apparently, everyone else knows him except me."

"Reigner is not my man." Sheenah jumped to quickly correct. "And to your question, I don't know, we've only met like twice. I don't even know him that well." She shrugged.

"You are being negative you know. C'mmon you just went on one date,

it's understandable." She suddenly paused, and with a thoughtful expression, asked, "you do like him, don't you?"

Sheenah thought, she did like Reigner, otherwise why would she go out with him? She was frightened by the power he seemed to have on her. But she was also intrigued. How could that even happen?

"I guess so." Sheenah answered, unsure.

Their food came, and Sheenah quickly started eating, trying to slow down the conversation.

"What's wrong?" Kendy asked, keenly observing her friend.

"Nothing, I'm totally fine."

Kendy continued staring and Sheenah continued eating, pretending that nothing was a miss.

"Fine!" Sheenah groaned, putting down her fork. She took a deep breath, and looked at her friend. She owed her some honesty, so she closed her eyes tightly, and started forming words in her mind. She hated such positions!

"I'm scared." She said, and wanted it to come out in the most stoic way but it came out as a whisper, carrying with it emotions.

"That's okay, it's-"

"No," she cut Kendy off, "I'm scared it will all come back. It started the exact same way with Jack, he seemed to have some power over me. Could read me easily, as if I was an open book. It felt as though I could never lie to him, he always saw through it. I felt open and vulnerable with him, just like Reigner and look at how it ended." tears started welling in her eyes and she blinked them away, angry at herself. "I can't afford to have the past repeat itself." She shook her head frantically, trying to reassure herself. "It'll break me. I'm not that strong." She whispered so softly and quietly that Kendy barely heard her.

Sheenah wanted to cry so badly, the pain was felt behind her eyelids. Her nose stung. She felt the pain come back but ten times stronger, as if while being suppressed, it was accumulating, becoming more powerful that when it hit her, she momentarily lost her breath. She gasped, before taking short quick breaths.

"Are you okay?" Kendy asked, alarmed.

"I'll be fine." She answered honestly, too focused on her breathing to look at her friend.

"Thank you for that." Kendy said, and on seeing Sheenah's questioning gaze, continued, "I know you hate such positions. You find it hard opening up, so thank you for telling me that." Kendy paused briefly before continuing, "Jack was an unfortunate phase of your life. You can't rub or erase it but he shouldn't hold you back anymore Sheenah. You deserve happiness, and although Reigner may or may not be a part of that happiness, don't let Jack, or any other thing drag you. Free yourself."

Free yourself.

Kendy's words echoed in Sheenah's head, almost giving her a headache. How was she supposed to free herself? She was so lost that she didn't even know where to begin from. The darkness had consumed her too much that she wasn't sure light could penetrate through anymore.

'One step at a time.' her inner voice whispered, so gently, and today, she welcomed that voice.

They continued eating, and the atmosphere was warm. From just a glance at their table you could sense the fondness, and the warmth the two had for each other. Sheenah looked around and smiled, she seemed a little, just a little bit lighter. She should talk more, she thought to herself.

Except, it wasn't that easy.

***

"What now?" Sheenah asked.

They were back to their room, her sprawled on her bed and Kendy with her laptop, keenly doing something while her on the other hand, bored.

"Work, I have a shit load of stuff I need to finish." Kendy replied, not looking up.

Sheenah wanted to protest, but thought better of it.

"I'll just go have some air." She said, hating being closed in that room. Kendy just hummed in response.

Outside, Sheenah looked at her surroundings, flocked with tourists. They seemed well off, from their faces, to their dressing code, and they were also staying at one of the most luxurious hotel in the city. Surely, money was nice! Her mind went back to a time when Mam Rose was still alive. They had been struggling, but kept on believing. Mam Rose and her Catholic faith had been inseparable. She had always insisted that the only way you could finish her off was by taking that from her.

Sheenah remembered her and the other children being taught how to pray the Rosary.

"This will win you any battle." Mam Rose had said once during her teachings.

Sheenah wasn't so sure of that anymore. She didn't even know if she still subscribed to the Catholic faith. She had started questioning her faith the day Mam Rose had died, and it had continued dimming with the events that had happened in her life till she wasn't sure if she still had any faith left in her.

Would the only woman who dared look at her with motherly eyes be disappointed at her? After all, that was the only thing she had been too strict about, even hoping that her, Sheenah, would influence her brother Derrick one day.

She continued with her observation, liking Mombasa so far but the heat was making her think twice about ever returning there. It was unbearable! Making her to want to shower after every five minutes. She sat at a swing, far from the chaos, and let her mind wander. After a while, she decided to call her brother.

He picked up on the first ring. "my favourite human being, hey sissy."

"Hey, how are you?" The smile that came naturally when talking to her brother lighted her face, making her glow.

"I'm good." He paused shortly, "Studying." She imagined him scowling, and laughed.

"Well that's what you are supposed to be doing."

"Now let's not forget whose older. I'm the big bro." He chuckled, before adding seriously, "I miss you, how are you doing?"

How was she doing? The answer to that question was supposed to be the easiest, but to her, it wasn't. She didn't know how she was doing. Or maybe she knew, she just didn't want to face her demons.

"I'm okay?" The answer came out as a question instead, making her grimace.

"Oh Abby," he said in a voice that brought only sad memories, making her eyes well up. He was the only person alive allowed to call her that; her first name. He loved her brother. Even if they weren't blood related, she'd do anything for him.

"How's UCL? Tell me about London." She jumped in, making her voice extra perky so that he wouldn't worry. God knew he had done too much of that already.

"London sucks." He groaned, making her laugh. "I miss home, I miss you. Schools generally suck."

"It's that bad? I thought you loved reading."

"You don't know half of it. At least the girls are hot." She wanted to scold him about his player ways, but hearing him made something in her heart tug. She was delighted, but at the same time pained. So they continued talking, and each time she laughed, tears would well up in her eyes, until she was crying, but not making any sound.