Days had turned turned into weeks and I was still in the hands of Zilo,the prestigious hunter.My heart had began to grow fond of him.Even though we hardly spoke,I felt some sort of connection between us.I had known him forever in a minute.
...." I am off to hunt...I will be back in the evening"....
I was quickly sent out of my dream world and i found myself nodding at Zilo with a stupid smile on my face.I had been hearing those words everyday for a while now and they had become like a song.
I could hear him walk away.He wore very heavy boots and I couldn't help but wonder how he managed to walk miles in them.I gave out a simple laugh at the thought of me wearing them....it would be but an amusing sight indeed.
I was now alone and I felt oddly unsatisfied at this.I felt like a part of me was missing.
...it could be the way he was always putting on a weary smile or the fact that I felt protected by him...I was not sure.
Zilo made me feel safe around him.I could not thank heavens enough him.I could not wait for the evening so I could see him again.
I got up from my wooden bed and began to clean the small hut.I felt like a loyal and submissive wife waiting for her husband,I smiled at this thought.
After I had cleaned the hut,I cooked some dried meat,'chibwabwa' and nshima.This was Zilo's favorite traditional meal and I prepared it for him whole heartedly.
....I had even began to dose off when I heard a sudden thud.I quickly got up from my slumber and my eyes rested on the tired hunter.
....."did I wake you?"
yes he did but I did not mind at all
.....I instead responded shyly that I was not sleeping but only resting my eyes.
I got up and began to serve him his meal.He gubbled it down silently.
...he must have been hungry indeed
After he had had he's meal..we both sat quietly.My eyes then darted around the small hut.It had two rooms in it but I had never entered the other one because Zilo warned me sternly against it.I wondered what he kept in this room that was so important but I dared not step foot in it even when he was not around.
...."you remind me so much of my mother"
these words instantly brought me back to reality.
Zilo continued," she was just as innocent and eager as you are...the sparkle that never dimes in your eyes is what makes you more like her."...he said these words and stared at me without a word.
.....what happened to her?,I asked.
Zilo responded in a pure acidic tone..."she was speared to death as we were running away from our village after we had been accused of practicing witchcraft."
I looked at him...He's eyes were very expressive but I could not tell what he's thoughts were at this moment.There was more to this man than what met the eye.
I was however grateful that he had opened up to me like that..this meant he trusted me.
This particular night was very chilly indeed .After a moment of silence...I got up from my stool and motioned for my bed.Zilo did the same.
He spent the nights on a reedmat that was beside my bed.I felt sorry for him for it was quite a chilly night and he had nothing to cover him.He had really sacrificed a lot for me.
I watched him as he lay on the reedmat and wrapped his arms around himself.I almost invited him to share my small wooden bed with me.I however brushed this awkward thought off and gave way to some sleep.
..in the middle of the night i felt a touch that numbed my whole body.
"I felt too cold on the floor and I figured you wouldn't mind sharing the bed"...
...I did not respond.I simply stared as he made way at the side of the small wooden bed and he lay down to rest.
For some reason I was not completely comfortable with this but then I comforted myself with the fact that Zilo would never hurt me.After about half an hour of staring at his resting body...I turned my back and felt my eyes closing.
I was woken up again by the feel of cold hands touching my bare back.I did not understand what was going on.Maybe I was just dreaming...I sure did hope it was a dream!
....seconds later,I felt the hands tracing my body towards my developing breasts.I jumped up at once but was drawn back to the bed by a more powerful opposition.I wanted to scream but he had covered my mouth with his strong rough had.At this point,he was on top of me and I was laboring under his weight.He was very heavy indeed and my fragile bones threatened to break into a thousand pieces.
I still could not believe this.My mind had convinced me so much that Zilo was too kind to force himself on me so much so that even at this point I believed he did was doing all this uncautiously.
I looked into he's eyes and instantly failed to read he's expression.He did not look like the Zilo I knew...this is when my spirit hit home...I was in terrible danger.
....I tried as much as I could to struggle and free myself.I tried hitting and scratching him.This just made him angry and he gave me a tight slap that instantly felt like I had taken ten bullets to the head.I instantly felt myself becoming weak.
....Zilo had overpowered me and had he's way with me that night.
When I woke up the following morning,I wanted to die.I had fallen into the exact trap I had run away from.My body felt sore..I did not feel like life was worth living anymore.I could not believe how unlucky I was.I began to cry ...softly at first then louder by the minute.I cried till I lost my voice completely.Even so,tears continued to flow from my eyes.
like I had lost my mind,I got up at once and aimed for the door.If I stayed here,the violence against my body would never end. I reached the door and as I was about to step out, I felt myself being grabbed by the neck.Zilo motioned me backwards and threw me on the hard and cold floor.
He picked me up and tied me to the wooden bed.
"if you love your life,do not try anything stupid while I'm gone"
He sounded very cold..unlike him.It was almost as if someone or something has taken over his body.
....I began to cry again.Why was I unlucky?
At only thirteen..I had been through so much and my pride had been taken away from me.it felt like I had nothing left to live for.
My eyes were fixed on one position on the floor.I then heard footsteps outside.The man who had taken my innocence had arrived.I wondered why one of the wild animals had not killed him.He pushed the door so
recklessly and came in.He looked at me and I looked at him.I felt utter disgust.I hated the mere sight of him.There was no one that I hated more than him at this point.He came in and threw himself on the bed.He did not move nor make a sound.It was almost as if he had died.From where I was tied up I could not see any breathing movements.I was about to give out a simple smile when he suddenly got to his feet..my spirit left my body.
I watched him as he prepared some food and lay it next to me.
..."Eat!"
he did not even pay attention to the fact that I was tied up and my mouth covered.He ate his food and went to sleep while I eyed my food hungrily from a distance.Night fell.
The following morning I noticed that Zilo's weird behavior had continued.He woke up and immediately started shouting at me for having not eaten my food.As if what he had put me through already was not enough.My eyes swelled up with tears again as I began to remember what he did to me that night.
He looked at me dangerously and I wiped my tears at once.
"Not another sound from you again if you love your miserable life."
Days had gone by and I began noticing changes in my body.My skin had lightened beyond measure and I had developed a lot of rough pimples on my face.I remember waking up one morning and feeling completely sick.I had only gotten worse as the days went on.The only thought that crossed my mind was that Zilo had infected me.I was going to die.
The following morning I was surprised that Zilo did not go hunting as he usually did.Instead he went out for about half an hour and came back with an old woman.She resembled Mungole,the woman who had saved me from marriage at a young age.
When I heard how roughly she spoke,I realized it was not her.She came near me and started touching me weirdly.I was far too weak to resist.She first felt my small,tender breasts and then took my hand in hers as she checked my eyes with her other hand.She turned my hand around and analysed it for a while before she finally dropped it.
"She is pregnant."
I nearly fainted.I felt all the little strength I had leaving my body.I let out a very devastated cry.Zilo came near me and tied my mouth very tightly.I felt out of breath but my tears continued to flow like a river.I had met the exact fate that I had escaped.My life was over for real this time.
" I would advise you to untie her and give her some food and water."
Zilo nodded at this and led her out of the small hut that carried a lot of bitter memories for me.I hated the sight of it.
Immediately she Left,he untied me and prepared some food for me.I was not touched by this act of kindness at all.I had however starved myself enough so I ate the food.
when night was beginning to fall,Zilo went out.I was Left alone in the dark hut.I could nolonger stand he's presence so I was grateful for this.After about an hour,I began to hear weird noises from the room I was forbidden to enter.They were some sort of screeching noises and they only grew louder as I tried to ignore them.Curiosity took its lead and I got to my feet to see what was making these noises.I got to the room,a rag acted as the door and I moved it slowly not knowing what to expect.
What I saw immediately dragged my soul to the ground.My entire body was shaken.I wanted to scream but I could not risk my life.
There Zilo was,sitted on the floor in a red and black gown.He's body stature had changed and he was much shorter but the face was his.He held a something that looked like the head of a human being He poked his hand in one of the eyes and drunk the blood.I felt week to my knees.His eyes had changed color and were all white,he began to chant.
I could not understand a word of what he said nor what it meant.Immediately he was done chanting,he began to rise from the ground until he was completely suspended in the air.A very dark man then appeared from the blues and came face to face with Zilo.
"Sarcrife her and the unborn child tomorrow at midnight and lay her in this very room."
I began to shake uncontrollably,I was unable to continue peeping due to the fact that I had become weak.I carried my frightened body and sat back on the chair.I still could not believe my eyes.
.....had I not seen Zilo leave the hut earlier?..was I just hallucinating?...the allegations of witchcraft from he's previous village must have been true.Zilo was a ritualist.
As soon as this thought hit my mind,Zilo made way into the hut.I almost screamed.He looked at me and sensed the fear.
...."what?"
.....nothing!,I responded.
He looked at me for a while and I was almost convinced that he had seen me peeping.He dropped his eyes and prepared food for us both.He served it to me and had his own in silence.When he was done he went straight to sleep.He had forgotten to tie me.
I eyed him for a while to see if he would remember that he had left me untied. He just lay there.
When it was about midnight and I was sure that he was deeply asleep,I got up and carried his hunting gun and put a rag over my shoulder.I was about to attempt my escape.Whatever would happen would happen.I had to take my chances.I was not going to let myself die in the hands of this ritualist.I had not come this far just to come this far.
I moved slowly in order for me not to wake him up.I opened the door carefully and closed my eyes.I expected him to pull me back but non of this happened.I was filled with hope.I took my first step to liberation for the second and last time, I hoped.I prayed that this time I would not fall prey to another predator.