Chapter 29

But boy I was wrong.

When we first sat on the carriage he used a silk cloth to tie one of our hands together.

"Please don't be mad wife."

And there he goes, smiling again.

Alright. Jun Xue, keep your cool. Exhale...

Inhale...

Take a deep breath.

Control. Control.

Think of blood. Yes, too much blood. Okay, okay... Good.

"Sheesh."

I gazed at the scenery outside with my mind elsewhere. At least, this is better than looking at this man.

Come to think of it, he seems quite unusual to his naughty side today.

Alright. Just a glance.

Taking a quick peek, I saw ML silently dozing off.

"Pfft." He looks tired. Even his clothes looked ruffled. He might be uncomfortable. To think it's different from how I've read him as a carefree man that has lots of time for Song Jing Hua. Are there too many protocols and procedures for this marriage that I don't know about? I might have taken away that freedom from him when he chose to marry me and when he gets back to his empire I'm sure there's more work to follow. Well, that would be unnecessary once I manage to escape.

Man, no matter how much I think I don't know what kind of trigger made him choose me. Was it when I turned batshvt crazy in killing those maids? What's so intriguing about a fool being mad? It's hard to believe if it was because of that incident.

I took off my coat but put it back again. Like I would give it to you.

Instead, there was a thin blanket that was set aside, it was wide enough to cover him. Alright, this should do it.

Well, as long as he has a cover.

My necklace, earrings, and accessories are top-notch I could sell them at a good price maybe I can stay alive for one or two days. Beneath my outer first dress, there is a second dress hiding beneath it, more like a nightdress but that could do.

It's quite hard to walk as elegantly as it should but I could manage. I sighed. Ah, my life.

I should rest too. I can't escape even if he is sleeping anyway.

....

"Wife..."

I frowned.

"Wife, open your eyes."

"Wife."

"Huh?"

I gradually opened my eyes.

"Yes?"

He chuckled.

"We've arrived."

"Oh."

I must have slept well.

The entrance to the temple was quite...high. There were thousands of stairs going up to the grand entrance. To think, the monks or whoever it is would climb these stairs many times more than I do, respect.

I gasped holding on to Ml's wrist. "W-Wait."

"Should we sit for a bit?"

I shook my head, "J-Just breath." I just need a breather, please. You're 21st Century Jun Xue had never done any extensive stair climbing.

"Hah."

Okay, thanks for the breather.

As soon as we caught sight of the temple I felt like I have done the most victorious thing, with one last step my foot landed on the last step of the stairs. Ah, I mentally patted myself. For someone who only has two routes school and home and a flattened road with few turns, I thought I might faint at any moment.

"So happy."

"You should have told me you're this frail I would have carried you."

I smiled.

"Li Jia Ying will think about it next time."

I don't want to argue with you.

"Mmmm."

So this is what a temple looks like. I might be disrespectful but I've never gone to any of this kind of spiritual thing. I've only watched them on television. A monk warmly came up to us and welcomed us to the temple guiding us amicably.

Soon we entered the Prayer Hall.

"Can Li Jia Ying do her prayer privately? Li Jia Ying likes to be outspoken when she wholeheartedly wants to pray."

Of course, the Ml who thinks I'm being playful twitched his lips. Suspicious of me now? Well, it's not like I'm masking it with the whole truth.

"Just where you can see me then."

I suggested as he quietly looked at me.

"You know I can't escape here, this place is mostly bare."

I whispered to him.

"Then take your time praying for our longevity."

He replied untying the silk on both of our wrists.

"Husband will patiently wait."

I cracked a smile, I could feel your threat.

"Yes."

In the story, although this is a Prayer Hall a thin wood is separated between this and the other side where a monk is located.

I just hope that it's him.

"'Please hear me, this humble one is named Li Jia Ying. Known as the foolish princess of the Empire, the First Princess of Empire. May the Grand Monk grant me your audience.'"

"Please hear my plight."

I just continued to lower my head covering my face with my hair. Waiting and waiting.

"Princess."

After a minute or two of waiting, I finally heard a voice. I looked up seeing a young man smiling at me. Such a skinny bald guy. Makes me think of that avatar guy.

"Please rise, the Grand Monk heard you."

Thank goodness.

"Do follow this servant."

I did. But before that, he put something on my neck like a dog's collar. "All those who enter the passage must wear this."

Why do you even wear this? Feels like a leash. I've never heard of it.

"Li Jia Ying understands."

As soon as we entered the closed-door the young man faced me. "May this servant see the seal?"

"Are you the Grand Monk's apprentice?"

The young man nodded.

"This servant can also distinguish if it's a real seal or not."

"Then just take a look and just one touch."

I showed the seal to him.

"It is indeed genuine, it's the only seal that was given by the Emperor. The Grand Monk is waiting."

The young man opened another door.

Inside, I saw the monk I'm looking for.

"This is the seal."

I showed it to him.

He smiled softly, "Please have a seat here."

I sat opposite him.

"Pardon my rudeness for letting my apprentice appraise the seal and for the cloth on your neck. You may remove it now. This shaman was quite surprised when he heard the Overlord gave you his permission to use it. You're not as you imply to be a princess."

I smiled back. "This princess knows you might have an inkling of what is happening now. This mortal wants to know how to get back to her world."

I directly went straight to the point. He was silent, staring at me before he laughed quietly. Hollow and without certainty. Ugh. Is there really no way?

"This monk knows your plight. However, if you wish to go back I'm afraid it is not within this humble one's knowledge to let you go back."

"Are you telling me that I have a reason for being here or it was accidental that I came here and it's unknown how I can return or not?"

"Either."

"...."

Keep calm.

"By any means should I resort just to go back? Even if it's to shorten my life I would. This world has two impressive women that came from my world shouldn't that suffice? I'm just an accident."

In the novel the Female Lead and the moment they came, it's as if he already knows who they were, except for the Second Female Lead who revealed it herself asking for a way to return but in the end that thought of searching disappeared and still stayed for a certain someone.

"Hmm."

The Grand Monk closed his eyes as if in deep thought.

"Those you hate and wanted to avoid might help you see the pattern of life to can go back to Samsara."

Samsara? Xianxia? No, I don't believe in that and I don't want to try that either.

"..."

"This humble one is only a mortal grazed with little enlightenment but you, yourself must find it on your own as you have an act of free will."

Strange, it's as if we humans don't have free will much less someone like the Grand Monk.

"Sorcery."

I uttered a bit desperate. "Witches, those who use magic. Do you know any that can help me even if I pay a huge price?"

Should I go to the west?

"My home is only where my mother belongs."

I told him. The world where my father is also buried. I can't stay here. No matter what, either I'll make enemies or wait for my killers and find myself a way back.

"My child, that is the only thing that this humble one can say."

Fvck. Isn't he just downright telling me that it's not my time yet? That returning depends on me and only I can know how? Seriously! If I think about it, it's like the more I avoid meeting those people means the hints are within them. What's this typical saying huh? Some legendary bullshit where the more you don't want to meet someone you'll have the higher probability to meet each other again and again?

"Maybe I should struggle to die. If killing myself is not to my liking then I'll make ways that someone or an accident can kill me."

I mumbled. "Yes."

But that was all in the drain when I heard the Grand Monk's unreserved thoughts. A bullseye. "Sometimes there's a curl, the more you're desperate to achieve the goal the more it'll be unreachable until you're view changes even if it's gradually unwanted."

I gritted my teeth.

There's no use coming here. So hopeless.

I can't imagine not wanting to go back home. My mother is my only family. The most important family I have left. My ray of sunshine. She's alive and is waiting for me. The only string connecting me to the modern world. I can't trouble her for long as it'll add more to her worry. If she dies of worry, anxiety, or depression it will be my fault! I didn't even make her happy yet! I didn't even graduate! No work, no investment, no insurance, no nothing yet.

Forever being stuck in this world, hah. Even if I do... I would always long for my mother in the modern world. Such life, I know I will feel only emptiness with this world, with these people. Even if I did garner some people, it'll all be a farce and without any genuine warmth.

"Sheesh."

I smiled.

"Thank you. Then this Princess will leave. Hoping that the venerable Grand Monk forgets my gullible talk."

He smiled back, a sad smile as if he knows what will happen. I don't like it. I guess I failed this round.

"Be at ease, My Lady. May we meet again."

Never again.

I nodded.

"Until then."