Chapter 6

I crept around the packhouse doing my best to sneak into the house-keepers room without being spotted, fear that I would be ridiculed made my heart panic. However, that was silly of me because as soon as I opened the door I saw a lot of my fellow students getting ready to do daily tasks.

“Oh, Laura! I’m surprised to see you here!” A girl with wavy red hair called out giving me a small wave and warm smile.

I returned her smile as I tried to recall her name, she rolled her eyes before grasping my hand in a handshake.

“Bella, seriously Laura I knew you were shy but we have been sitting next to each other for years!” Her voice was light and kind but that still did not stop the embarrassment to consume me. As always my cheeks flushed hot red as I struggled to make eye contact. She raised her eyebrow quizzically but changed the subject.

“So, we were all just discussing what floor we were going to do. Have you done any housekeeping before?”

“No… umm” I managed to get out, my lips were dry and my throat hoarse from nerves.

“Well, in that case, I suppose you can help me today and I’ll show you what to do. If that is okay with everyone else?” She glanced around as the others smiled and nodded politely.

“Right, so first off we will need to grab one of these” she pulled out a trolley that came up to my chest with a big canvas bag to hold what I assumed would be laundry. “And, one of these” she passed me a rack on wheels filled with folded sheets and pillows.

“So, our job is to replace all the beds with new linin on the third floor as the Alpha is expecting more guests for pack business or something” she rolled her eyes seeming to be uninterested.

“Do you do this every day?” I asked as we walked towards the third floor, she gave me a weird look before laughing.

“Of course not! We all take it in turns, each member of the pack needs to help with odd jobs so we can fully function. Didn’t you learn that as a kid?”

I turned to look at my feet as she gasped, “Oh sorry Laura, I… Ummm… I suppose the Alpha and Luna never…”

I sighed before glancing at her face to see her bewildered but embarrassed, I gave her a small smile “I don’t think they even remember what other members of the pack do. They just kinda, left me alone?” I shrugged as if it was no big deal but Bella gave me a sympathetic look.

“Really? Like what, just let you do what you want?”

I shrugged again “yeah, I mean they never really even saw me unless it was to do with school or Xander…” I felt my face fall as a twinge of pain overtook me. Bella gave me a sad look before sighing herself.

“Look, Laura, I know you don’t think of me as a friend or any of our classmates that way but we all talk… and… I don’t think you are Xander’s mate.” Her voice trailed off, nervous almost like she was scared of my reaction.

“I… well he loves me…” I felt tears form at the edges of my eyes, Bella looked torn for a moment before she stopped walking giving me her full attention. Her eyes fully on me were almost pleading.

“Laura, if he actually loved you he wouldn’t treat you the way he does. Like a secret. He knows that you might not be his mate and he doesn’t care.” She took a steadying breath. “The way he talks about girls… it’s disgusting. He doesn’t love you, Laura.”

I bit my lip as tears fell freely, Bella looked pained and seemed to regret talking at all but she shook her head and quickly spoke “let’s get started, just follow my lead”.

The rest of the day went quickly, my arms were killing me though. I had no idea just how many bedrooms there were on just that floor alone! Bella and I shared jokes and other small conversation topics but it still felt weird, I couldn’t shake her words and I knew she felt my hesitation.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you later…” I said awkwardly giving Bella a little wave, she smiled brightly back.

“I would love that Laura, seriously, you are so much fun!” she giggled before walking away. I felt a surge of confidence pump through me before the stinging sensation of fear replaced it.

She had probably just said that to be nice, I knew I had been super awkward, I even had cried. A disturbing sense of self-hatred clouded my mind as I walked back to the room I shared with Domini.

So of course I did not notice as I walked right into Xander, as soon as I felt his familiar warmth my heart sang. He grinned at me, that typical boyish grin as he held my shoulder tightly but still nice.

“Laura, watch out.” He looked me up and down, “you almost took me out!” I smiled, reaching a hand up to stroke his cheek, he closed his eyes as I made contact leaning into my hand. No, they were wrong. He did love me, and he was my mate. Why else would he react this way to my touch?

“I missed you…” he whispered holding my hand to his face for a moment before dropping it quickly, his expression torn.

“We can’t keep doing this Laura…”

“Why?” I asked after a moment, confused, hurt, and curious.

“Because. What… What if we aren’t mates?” His voice trembled as if the thought pained him, my heart was hammering wanting nothing more than to soothe him. But my brain stopped me, some small part of me knew I needed to listen. Bella’s words ran back through my brain, Domini’s warning, the Luna’s talk. He sighed bracing himself before continuing.

“I… I don’t know if I actually love you… I won’t know till we turn… and I don’t want to have to reject my actual mate if we're wrong.”

Each word cut my heart, but I listened.

“Laura, I know I care about you. I know I do… but…” he reached his hand out to touch my face,

I flinched away my heart aching.

“Laura, please… I just… I still want to be with you” he sighed deeply looking me over again.

“But we would have to keep it a secret, and if the time comes that you are not my mate…” I held my hands up to my ears as my tears started falling.

“Stop! What are you saying? Do you want me as a side chick? A fling?” My voice was aggressive but the shakiness took away any sense of actual anger. He smiled smugly at me causing my heart to break more.

“Well, what else would you call it?”

I shook my head a sense of shame coming over me as I took a step away from him.

“Laura, you can’t say no.” His eyes darkened as his hand gripped my wrist bringing me into his chest.

“I am your future Alpha, and you will do as I say.” I thought my heart would stop beating as I felt his member hard against my leg, his eyes so dark with lust. For once I wished the Luna or

Alpha would appear around the corner like they used to do but they didn’t. I struggled against his chest but he held me tighter.

“Please….” I whimpered out “you’re scaring me, please.” Xander let me go, his expression a mix of horror and longing.

“I’m sorry…. I… I don’t know why I…” he furrowed his eyes staring at me with a pained look as I tried to calm my breathing. Xander hovered his hands around me wanting to comfort me but I slapped them away, still reeling from what he had done, well what he was about to do. A low growl echoed through the hallway, I snapped my head up to see Victor staring at me again with those eyes full of hatred.

“What…” he asked before looking at Xander, He froze for a moment before smirking.

“Ah I see, wanted to play another game eh? You get your kicks from picking on pups?” I felt that same anger I felt from yesterday as he dismissed me so quickly and called me a pup again.

“n… no sir …” Xander stammered out looking down at his feet as if he was a pup, I felt shocked that he reacted like that. I mean Victor was an Alpha, yes, but not his Alpha. Victor looked back at me and I glared, he almost seemed taken aback which made me feel a little smug.

“Go away.” My voice was steady and calm, again it was so odd that I felt so… secure in talking to this man. Xander gasped and looked at me like I had a death wish as Victor huffed, brushing his hand through his hair.

“I was trying to help, pup.”

I couldn’t think of anything to retort with so I stuck out my tongue. He looked back at me aghast as I turned on my heel and started walking away, Xander caught my arm turning me back to face him.

“Please, Laura, can we… talk more about this… later?” His eyes pleaded with me and I knew this was his form of apology but my heart was still raw with pain. I shook off his hand and glared at him as Victor growled again.

“Do not touch her.” I was surprised he seemed so aggressive about it, but he honestly thought he had physically harmed me or… followed through on what he wanted to do… I shuddered at the thought of being taken that way. For a moment being utterly repulsed by Xander.

“I need time.” That is all I could say before high-tailing it out of there not wanting anyone else to see me crying for the rest of my life.