Blank (1) (Told from Blank’s perspective)

[Blank]

Royal said he was fine, what even did fine mean? Blank had finally come out of his drunk state to find a quivering naked Royal who was crying and trembling all over. And to make it worse he had moved and Royal had started having a panic attack.

He would murder Chase if he wasn't his best friend since they were young. He was still considering all kinds of punishments.

"Hey Sly." Blank turned to his guilds main healer player.

The guy was interesting. His actual name was Summer and he had a twin called Winter. But everyone called him Sly because he said Summer sounded to cheerful for a gamer name. He was also one of the few pure healer players.

He said it was because he hated combat but it left him rather defenseless on his own. Not to mention who plays games if you don't like combat? Sly was always healing or fishing. Sometimes cooking or rather burning his fish if you were lucky enough to see. His attitude was usually nice enough and he was blunt and to the point. If you were dying he'd be like you dying, no sugar coating. His secondary class was a sub-version of healing called EMT class. Basically he specialized in everything healing, the weirdo.

The blond looked over at him "hmm?"

"You said that Royal would be fine when he woke up, but he seems to pass out a lot. Is that normal?" Blank asked.

"Depends on your standards for normal. By an average human, no he's far from normal. By an OCD germ a phobic nutcase, yeah he's normal enough."

Blank gave him a confused look and Sly sighed.

"Basically he passes out a lot from his brain having a large anxiety attack, but his body functions normally enough so it isn't a problem. He just sleeps it off. It would only be a problem if he passes out in front of a beast one day or if something changes and his body starts reacting badly to it." Sly said. "Anyway you should try not to worry too much about the passing out stuff. However I would go talk to Chase about the whole drugging and drunk mess. Have fun sorting that one out!"

Blank shot him a glare and Sly smirked.

"That's assuming he ever manages to forgive me." Blank muttered back.

Sly left the room. Off to see who ever his next victim of the day was. Blank sulked over things in his mind for a few minutes before settling on one fact. Chase.

He got up and stalked out of the room. He could follow the route to his friends room with his eyes closed if he wanted. He didn't even bother knocking as he opened the door.

Chase looked up from his desk. "Blanky! So I heard your little pal was okay, that's good right?"

"Chaser." Blank growled using Chase's gamertag name, something he only did when upset and Chase knew it.

Blank glared as Chase started spouting a million different excuses and points. Most of which he ignored.

"I mean if you want someone in your bed, you should just take them. You've had him over several times but didn't do anything so I just helped you out a little and….."

His voice trailed off as Blank's glare grew harsher.

"I thought I mentioned how much I respected Royal and you, you just, Urguh" Blank hurtled a poor undeserving pillow at Chase.

The poor pillow didn't deserve such treatment. He should have gone with the hideous looking lamp by the bed instead. After all Sly could patch up Chase later if necessary.

Chase shoved the pillow to the side. "Why are you so upset? Just find another boyfriend, you've only known him a few days anyway."

"I hope your love life suffers one day for all the pain you've caused others." Blank growled. "And I've known him longer than that."

"You have? Since when? Or wait if you are referring to knowing him in game that doesn't really count." Chase said.

"Yes in game, and yes it counts." Blank growled back.

Chase rolled his eyes, "You didn't even know he was a germ a phobic until recently."

"He means the world to me okay!" Blank hissed.

"Really, how? Sure you've always talked about him and held a fascination for him but that's not love." Chase replied.

"He saved my life." Blank replied.

"Huh?" now Chase just looked confused.

Blank sighed "Listen up cause I'm only going to tell you this story once."

He paused looking at the ground. Half of him had tried to lock away this memory a long time ago. Half of him wanted to remember it forever because of Royal.

"I told you how my mom died giving birth to me and my father went missing." Blank grumbled. "It's where my stupid name came from."

Chase nodded his head.

"Well when I was in the orphanage my dream was always to find a family and be adopted." Blank said. "One day when I was 12 I learned that I wasn't even available to be adopted. They had lied to me my whole life saying I'd find a nice family one day when they already knew that because of my father's missing status I was classified and unable to be adopted."

Blank's face contorted with irritation at the memory. Before he continued again.

"I had put up with years of abuse, foster parents keeping the money of the government for themselves, feeding myself off of performing in the streets, just one day hoping to have a family of my own." Blank realized he was shaking a little and fixed it before continuing, "there aren't words to describe how the 'real kids' treat the temps."

"Okay but how does Royal fit into this?" muttered Chase.

"Shush, I'm getting there." Blank muttered, "Anyway I decided that if my dream could never happen because of some dumb paper work I might as well try again in the next life."

Beside him he felt Chase stiffen. It had been the weakest point in Blank's life. To the guild he was the calm collected leader.

"I never knew." Chase whispered. "I lived across from you for 5 years and I never knew."

"I never told you." Blank laughed darkly. "Anyway I went online to do some research on best ways. Then a ad popped up for a game called NewLegacy. Why are you shaking?"

Blank looked over at Chase who had started trembling.

"I just…. Well I always called myself your best friend..." his voice trailed off, then he reached over and hugged Blank.

"Oh please I'm fine now." Blank muttered pushing him off. "Anyway I logged into NewLegacy just because I thought I'd ask someone on their the best way to die." He felt slightly morbid, "You know like a dumb kid that I was."

Chase just patted his back.

"Anyway I ran into a certain player called RoyalBlue and asked him what's the best way to die." Blank laughed "Do you know what that idiot said? Most people would be like oh no please don't blah blah blah makes you hate yourself more thing."

"What?" said Chase.

"He said he wasn't sure, but if I found a painless one I should tell him about it before I used it."

Chase looked shocked, "Wait does he have a death wish too?"

"I don't think so." Blank said. "So then I was like knife. And he was like ouch. And I was like poison, and he was like painful. And I was like starvation and he replied with that takes far too long. So I was like drowning and he was like how long can you hold your breath."

Blank muttered darkly to himself again for a second. "Somehow a few hours passed with me following him around. At some point he switched to the new player areas and I started bloody enjoying myself. I'm not even sure what happened but I started looking forward to seeing him every day, then I somehow ended up in a guild the EagleRevenges when they disbanneded I started the SnowLeopards. By then I had several friends and Royal withdrew to himself again. He's such a quite withdrawn person, actually probably because of all his real life stuff. I wonder if he even remembers?"

Chase shrugged "It's great that you idolize him like that, I think, but the fact still remains you know close to nothing about him in reality. You only knew his game persona. Think on that for awhile okay, idolization isn't the same as love."

Chase left the room. Blank paused glaring at the wall. He had forgotten to punish his friend in some way. He'd have to work on that. But a few parts were true and sat back on Chase's bed thinking.

I totally know Royal. He's a quiet germ a phob and he's cute and he likes... what all does he like. Blank tried thinking for quite awhile then finally came to a conclusion.

He hardly knew Royal at all. Well at least he was a good person. Although what kind of person asks another if they know a painless way to die when they are thinking of dying?

He slapped the slides of his face.

"Stop doubting on how much you actually know Royal." He muttered to himself. "Royal is a good person."

But traces of doubt stayed. What kind of love hardly knew anything? What if Royal wanted him to die that day? What if he wanted him to die now because of what he had done?