Laurence and Eduardo have been lovers for ten wonderful years, but in the past few months Eduardo has become distant. Still madly in love with his Brazilian hunk, Laurence tries everything he can think of to win Eduardo back. When he catches Eduardo being unfaithful with one of the young servants, Laurence’s world is turned upside down. An argument ensues and Eduardo disappears during the night.<br><br>On his own for the first time in his life, Laurence decides to escape his memories of Eduardo by visiting Paris indefinitely. He stays at the new, opulent Hotel Regina where he meets Brenton, a fellow Brit. They visit the Moulin Rouge and afterwards, Brenton takes him to a club in the backstreets of Montmatre. Le Cul Noir is a men’s club where Laurence discovers he hasn’t been as outrageous as he previously thought.<br><br>He grows to care for Brenton, but he’s surprised to find himself thinking more and more about Eduardo. He knows he can’t have them both, but does he try to forget all about the love of his life and stay in Paris? Or does he have to find the courage to say goodbye to Brenton and go in search of Eduardo -- a man who may be lost to him forever?

Erotique

There’s silence while they serve, but I use the time to think of questions to ask, and to construct little speeches.


“Smells good. Just the way I remember.”


“You’ve only been gone barely four months,” I say.


I chew a mouthful of food then swallow. “So tell me what you’ve been up to.”


Eduardo shrugs. “I went back to Brazil to see my family. It was about time and I could think of no better place to be.”


“I had to. I couldn’t stop thinking about you and how badly I treated you. I have no excuse. Perhaps I thought I wanted something else. Someone else. I don’t know. We’ve been together for ten years. Nothing could have stopped me from returning to you, even if it was to know for sure you wanted me out of your life.”


I put my knife and fork down. “I never wanted you out of my life, Eduardo. I tried so hard to win you back and you ignored me. I didn’t know what to do and when I saw you with Daniel, well, it nearly killed me.”


Chapter 26