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Chapter 19

Everything she loved about him, everything he was, that’swhat killed him—he would have done it all again, even if he knew he’d die in the first air raid, that’s just the way he was made. Still, it didn’t make the days any shorter or the nights any warmer, and most of the time her heart was a whirlwind of anger and sadness and love and hate that was too much for her to weather alone.

Delia’s a lot like her. I see it in the flash of her eyes, the set of her jaw. She loves me, I know she does, but she hates what I have to do to protect her, and when I come away wounded and bloody, it justifies the whirlwind inside her heart. As long as it breaks me, she can tell herself she hates the regulators and what they do to me, what they force me to do. But what if there’s a part of me that could likeit, if it wasn’t cruel and painful? What if there was someone I might actually enjoyit with, if given the chance?