Chapter 1

I see the red Help Wantedsign in the window of Hoagie Joe’s and just have to stop.The deli’s a few blocks from campus and I’ve been there before with some of my friends,but I never noticed the sign until now.Shit,I need a job if I hope to pay for my books in the fall,and who’d see me in one of those silly white aprons anyway?All my friends have left State for the summer—it’s just me and the empty apartment I managed to find above the music store down the street.I could walkto this place if I got hired…and truth be told,how hard can it be working here,anyway?Making sandwiches isn’t exactly brain surgery.I’m not Emeril but I think I can manage to toast bread.

Maybe they just want someone to sweep the place at night or wash dishes.Take out the trash.I can do that.I can answer the phone,maybe take orders when the customers come in,something.The sign doesn’t necessarily say they’re looking for a cook.

What’ll it hurt?I pull open the heavy glass door and duck inside.A tiny chime rings through the deli,and I already know I’ll grow to hate that soundif I’m hired.I don’t think I can listen to it all night long,every time someone walks in to place an order.It’ll drive me insane.

Inside,the deli is small—no chairs or tables or anything like that.Just a long counter with an ancient cash register hulking on one end,a heated glass-enclosed display case housing fried chicken on the other.Along one wall there’s a refrigerated case half-filled with bottles of soda.A pair ofswinging doors behind the counter lead back to the kitchen,and that’s it.

In front of the drink case,holding it open,is a guy about my age.He has an unruly beard that’s mostly stubble and shaggy brown hair brushing his collar.If he’s on the grill,I don’t think I want to order.The apron tied around his waist is smeared with mustard and ketchup and grease,and his jeans don’t look much better.

He looks up as I enter,an easy grin already on his face.Grabbing a bottle of soda,he twists off the cap and takes a long swig.“Hey,”he says with a nod.“You call in an order?”

I shake my head.

Another swallow of soda,his throat working as he drinks.With a refreshed sigh,he asks,“You know what you want?”

I admit,“I’m not really here to eat…”

But he’s already leaning on the counter,pen in hand and reaching for a tablet to write on.“What’ll it be,dude?”

I shake my head again.“I was wondering about the job.”I point at the sign in the window.“It says help wanted?”As if he can’t read it.

For a moment he frowns like he hasn’t noticed the sign before,then he turns and looks down behind the counter.“We hiring,Deon?”I didn’t realize anyone else was here.

From below the counter a deep voice responds,hidden from sight.“Your dad put that up this morning,Joe.We’re looking for someone else at night.”

Two strong,dark hands appear on the counter by Joe’s elbow,and Deon hoists himself up from behind the register.As he stands,I see tight black curls shaved back off a smooth brow,the sides faded in lines over the ears.Dark eyes like shadows glance my way.A wide nose above full,sensuous lips…damn,but he’s a sexy man.I have a thing for black guys,I admit,and this one has skin like rich caramel.I stare at his waist,where his apron is cinched tight,then my gaze travels up,my imagination erasing his clothes to expose a taut belly and firm chest.His arms are thin but muscular—what I wouldn’t give to feel them wrapped around me.Then I meet his eyes again,those eyes,and I can’t remember what I’m here for.Did someone say order up?

With a hint of a smile,he asks,“You looking for a job?”

Is he talking to me?Before I can stop myself,I ask,“What do you need me to do?”

My voice cracks at the faint innuendo that runs like an electric current beneath my words.Joe laughs and looks at me critically,and my hand strays tothe do-rag I tied over my hair this morning instead of washing it.I know he’s thinking I’m a thug,with this bandanna and these diamond stud earrings and this torn T-shirt,these baggy pants.I can see it in his eyes—wigger.

I feel so childish all of a sudden,so out of place in this cozy daddy-owned deli,just a college kid from out of town looking for a place to work,and you know what?I don’t want the job anymore.I just want to walk out and go back to my tiny little two-room flat,stare at the walls and remember those melted chocolate eyes,hiseyes…I’ll never be able to forget them,or the way he smacks Joe and smiles at me when he says,“You ever worked in a deli before?”

I shake my head.“I can learn.”Damn,that sounds just a littletoo eager.My cheeks heat up and I pick at the cracked countertop with one bitten nail.“I mean,I’m sure it’s not too hard.”

Joe laughs again.“Hard compared to what?”he asks,winking at me.

I knowmy face is flushed now,I can feel my cheeks blaze.I don’t need to stay here and take this.I don’t need this job that badly—I can find something at the mall,maybe somewhere on campus,on the bus route…

“Don’t mind him,”Deon says,pushing Joe’s arm off the counter.“You want to order or are you just inquiring about the position?”

Inquiring about the position.It’s on the tip of my tongue to ask what position he prefers,but then I realize he’s not thinking what I’m thinking.He’s talking about the Help Wantedsign,not the sordid press of flesh on flesh that invades my mind.James,stop it,I warn myself.

Joe laughs again.He looks at me with that shit-eating grin,his eyes crimped into half-mooned secrets,and damn him,but he knowswhat I’m thinking,I just knowhe does.Is it that obvious?

“I was wondering about that job,”I say softly.This was a bad idea,I know that now.I will never be able to sleep again.Every time I close my eyes I’llsee Deon’s behind mine,keeping me awake forever.

“Can you work nights?”Deon asks,

I nod numbly.As long as I spend them with you,I think,and I drop my gaze from his demanding stare because I know he’ll read my thoughts in my eyes.I don’t dare speak;if I do,I’ll say the words out loud,they’ll take flightand I’ll lose whatever chance I might have with him.At least now I have something,you know?I have this moment,and the memory of his smile and his eyes,and I’m hoping I’ll have this job,too.Then I can see him every night,and we’ll become the best of friends,I just know it,and I can invite him over and learn if the things I see hidden behind his dark eyes are the samethings I’m thinking right now…