Enforcer Ewan “Cal” Calder hasn’t shifted into his Scottish wildcat form in two years. He should’ve gone crazy by now, because that’s how these things are supposed to work. The governing body of all shifters, the Council, has sent him and his adopted teenage son Kit to a sanctuary in Finland. It’s a last-ditch effort to wean Cal off the morphine he’s been using to keep his cat at bay. If he doesn’t shift soon, there’s no way he’s going to retain his sanity.<br><br>Two years ago, Council security officer Derek Lamont was tentatively dating and getting to know Cal, but then he lost an eye in a tragic accident. While he was recuperating in the hospital, Cal and Kit vanished from the house they’d all shared. Derek has been searching for them ever since, traveling the world and grasping at straws because of the undeniable truth: Derek knows Cal is his mate, even though humans aren’t supposed to be able to feel the mate bond.<br><br>When Derek finds Cal and Kit at a small farm in the middle of nowhere, Finland, he feels relief. But their problems are far from over. From Cal’s guilt over the accident, to stray hunting dogs, to figuring out how to deal with the Council, things keep piling up.

Off and On Again

Cal was afraid to face Derek.He’d accepted that fact after a while.The cat was relaxing and letting Cal be more conscious now,and he had some hope that it would let him out soon.


He realized he wanted to keep shifting back and forth again,like he once had.He wasn’t sure how…sustainable that idea would be,because he knew that the morphine was now gone from his system and the things he’d been hiding from would return into his mind as soon as he was in full control.


The cat had been a buffer.When Cal used morphine to keep the cat at bay,the cat was also a weird sort of barrier between the destructive thoughts about what had happened.Now that the cat was active again,Cal knew that once he shifted back,those memories and thoughts would be back,too.


He didn’t know if this was how all shifters’brains worked,but it was his truth,and…yeah.


Chapter 13