Life's not easy when your mum's nuts, your uncle is becoming your aunt, and one of your crushes could -- and probably would -- break your face if he found out how you felt about him. That's Tab's life, though, malevolent gods and all. His text-flirting with Demi, the brother of his best friend, is going nowhere: Demi already has a boyfriend and anyway, who dates their best friend's twin? But then, the pining after Nick is going nowhere either, because Nick probably likes gay-bashing on Friday nights for fun. He's gorgeous, but he's dangerous, and Tab knows better than that. So what's a bit of harmless flirting, when one is taken and the other is straight? It's just a bit of fun. That is until Demi is suddenly single, and Nick is not looking as straight and scary as he was before.

The Suicidal Peanut

But you couldn’t tell Aunt JuliKate anything, so yeah. Andy. He’d been ‘Andy’ ever since that day. He hated it, because his first crush ever had been called Andy, and Tab had hated him for having a girlfriend and being generally so bloody niceabout the whole fiasco and, most of all, being straight. Heterosexual bastard.


MaxiBaby: Pur-leeeeez, Tab! You totes had someone in mind! ;) Tell me!!


AdequateHeroes: I might see if one of the guys at the gym would let me take a photo and use that. Portrait in motion, you know? Thinking I might break out the charcoal.


“Sorry,” he mumbled around a mouthful of worms, and ducked Uncle Eddie’s enormous paw as he stumbled into the kitchen and attempted to ruffle Tab’s hair, still steaming from the shower. JuliKate rolled her eyes, but accepted the offered kiss on the cheek with grudging grace.


Chapter 4