Life's not easy when your mum's nuts, your uncle is becoming your aunt, and one of your crushes could -- and probably would -- break your face if he found out how you felt about him. That's Tab's life, though, malevolent gods and all. His text-flirting with Demi, the brother of his best friend, is going nowhere: Demi already has a boyfriend and anyway, who dates their best friend's twin? But then, the pining after Nick is going nowhere either, because Nick probably likes gay-bashing on Friday nights for fun. He's gorgeous, but he's dangerous, and Tab knows better than that. So what's a bit of harmless flirting, when one is taken and the other is straight? It's just a bit of fun. That is until Demi is suddenly single, and Nick is not looking as straight and scary as he was before.

The Suicidal Peanut

“Seriously,” Tab said. “Kill him. Like. I don’t know the rules or anything—”


“You live in a boxing gym and you don’t know the rules?”


“—but if you—shut up—don’t absolutely destroy him and smash him into little bits of pulp and put the pulp in a matchbox and post the pulp home to his mother—then I’m telling my uncle you called me the f-word, and you’ll get kicked out of the gym, too,” Tab finished breathlessly.


If not for Allen, he would be happily imagining Nick to be entirely impossible and horrified by gay people, and he could have blissfully gone off with Demi by now. Jerk. So Allen needed to die.


“Wo-ow,” Nick said slowly, then smirked and leaned forward so his face was less than an inch from Tab’s. Kissing distance. Dear God. Tab swallowed, and felt his blood sinking along with the movement. “And just a hint? Don’t threaten me again.”


Chapter 39