Fox McHardy leads a charmed life. Puget Sound penthouse, gorgeous boyfriend, jet-setting job -- everything he’s ever wanted, he’s gotten, including the heck out of the small Iowa town he grew up in. Even the trip he takes to Miami to surprise his boyfriend Jeremy is something of a long-shot wish fulfilled. Until he arrives in South Florida. Once things start to unravel, they do so with alarming speed, and he finds himself riding shotgun in a rented convertible with his new sworn enemy faster than he can say, “I want my old life back.” During an unscheduled stop on the cross-country road trip From Hell, Fox passes up a perfectly good opportunity to keep his mouth shut and finds himself planning the town’s first legal gay wedding -- his own, to a man he’s pretty sure he should hate. But someone needs to set a positive example for the queer and questioning youth in this corner of Middle America and, after creatively arranging certain of the facts of his life more attractively, he is proud to offer himself up as a role model. Small Town, USA, steps up; the grooms are widely celebrated, and generous offers of food, flowers, and picture-perfect venues pour in. The only real challenge will be keeping the lies straight and the truth under wraps until they can get out of town.

Crazy Like Fox

“Hey, Mom!” the kid yelled again. “Gimme a hundred bucks!”


Okay, it’s not like I was trying to unload my phone. I was in the middle of nowhere with no clear understanding of how I was going to get out, and my phone was one of the only resources available. But a bidding war was a lot more interesting than letting some small-town high school basketball has-been take advantage of my compromised position for fifty dollars, and we would still have Thumper’s phone.


“What are you hollerin’ about?” asked the kid’s mom, shuffling over to our little corner in her velveteen track suit and her purple jellies.


“This guy’s selling an iPhone for a hundred dollars.”


“No, he’s not,” said Lurch. “This is a private transaction between buddies, not a garage sale.” He put a giant hand on my shoulder. “I’ll give you a hundred and twenty five bucks for it. Cash.”


Chapter 30