Chapter 33

Too soft for his age, too thick-waisted for his undies, way too many rolls where he should have had muscles, Thumper swung his body like he had all the curves a man liked. I felt like I should at least be turned off by Thumper on principle. I was nobody’s chubby chaser, and I wanted to be repulsed, wanted to be disgusted, wanted to sit on the high horse of my bar stool and wonder what Jeremy could possibly have seen in this lumpy puppy, but when Carl Carlton sang it, it was true; he was heavenly. The way he was shakin’ it like he had something to be proud of, it was a treat for the eye to see.

And he knew it. He shook and shimmied until the last note of the song was long gone. For a split second, the cavernous bar went so silent that I heard actual crickets chirping.

And then the roar ripped the roof off. 9