Chapter 1

Jay was drunk. Thankfully, he managed to avoid embarrassing himself or anyone else, but everyone noticed (and tried to ignore) the slurred speech, the laughter that went on a beat too long, the excessive and uncharacteristic friendliness. His inebriation was just another sour note in an evening that had started poorly and went steadily downhill from there.

My friend Olivia and I had made plans to have dinner at a high-priced Mexican restaurant we??d both heard about, but hadn??t been to yet. It was just supposed to be a quiet evening with the two of us catching up. After moving into Jay??s condo six months ago, I??d seen less and less of Olivia. She didn??t care for my boyfriend and preferred to steer clear of him whenever possible. Jay wasn??t particularly fond of her either, although he claimed she was the catalyst for the negativity between them. ??I wouldn??t have a problem with Olivia if shedidn??t have a problem with me,?? was his defense. He even suggested having a three-way with her, telling me that whatever problems he and Olivia had would all be solved if the three of us just climbed into bed together, turned out the lights, and ??let nature take its course.?? Right. As if thatwould ever happen.

When Olivia showed up at the condo Saturday night, Jay invited himself to dinner and the drama began. Even though she was clearly not happy to have him tag along as a third wheel, Olivia kept her mouth shut and we headed to the restaurant. Dinner went about as well as expected. It wasn??t terrible, due mainly to the food and pitchers of margaritas that kept coming at Jay??s request, but it wasn??t that great either. Olivia shut down and clammed up, leaving me and Jay to do most of the talking. At one point, I got up to go to the bathroom and when I returned to the table I heard Jay sarcastically telling her, ??You really don??t get it, do you???

??No,?? she said. ??I guess I don??t.??

Jesus, I couldn??t go take a leak without them sniping at each other. I thought about giving my ??Can We All Just Get Along?? speech yet again but, decided against it since, obviously, my pleas weren??t doing much to help their strained relations.

??What??s going on??? I asked.

They both looked at me with blank expressions before Jay shrugged and mumbled, ??Nothing.??

While we were mulling over the dessert menu, Jay noticed some people he knew at another table and left to speak with them.

??You??re awfully quiet tonight,?? I told Olivia. ??You??re upset that Jay??s here, aren??t you???

??No.??

??Liar. Your whole demeanor changes when he??s around.??

??No, it doesn??t.??

??Yes, it does. Don??t you think I can tell???

??He just irritates me.??

??Give him a break, Olivia. He??s trying. He really wants you two to be friends.??

She rolled her eyes.

??He does. He??s quite fond of you actually.??

??The only person Jay Tanner is fond of is Jay Tanner.??

??That??s not true.??

??Brian, I know you love Jay and you mean well, but you need to stop trying to force a friendship between us because it??s never going to happen.??

Jay and I had recently reunited after an exhausting on-again/off-again relationship that spanned nearly five years. When we first met, he was in the closet. Then, after about a year of sneaking around to see each other, he dumped me to marry a woman, Meghan, claiming his position as the ??AccuWeather Authority?? for Channel 2 (Philadelphia??s News Leader) would be in jeopardy if anyone found out he was gay. ??Try to understand, baby,?? he said. ??It??s not personal. You know I love cock, especially yours, but I have to try loving pussy for a while. My career depends on it.??

Jay and Meghan were married for two years and had a son together, named Brian, of all things, before he finally decided to end his marriage and come out publicly as gay. (As a side note, when Meghan found out her son and I shared the same name, she went ballistic and threatened to have the boy??s name changed. But Jay talked her out of it, arguing, ??Brian is the only name he knows! Do you really think he??s going to respond if we suddenly start calling him Chuck???) Soon after his divorce was finalized, he agreed to an interview with Philadelphiamagazine and let the cat out of the bag (or out of the closet, I should say). And a few months after that startling revelation, we moved in together.

Olivia, whose own (now ex-) husband had cheated on her and impregnated another woman in the process, was not happy about my relationship with Jay. She constantly berated me for seeing him and bitched about the awful way he??d treated and lied to his wife.