Chapter 3

After you’ve had a three-way in a place, it tends to stick in your mind.

Actually, come to think of it, I don’t reckon it’s ever been used for anything but group sex. I’m going to be well hacked off later if I have to wait for a bloody orgy to finish before I can take a leak. I think about suggesting they keep it locked, like a lot of places do, but on the other hand, it pisses me off something chronic to have to ask for a key, like I’m five years old and back at school, asking teacher’s permission to have a pee.

A space opens around me. I’d like to think it’s respect, but it’s more likely they’re worried amputation is contagious. Or that I’ll roll on their toes. Still, it means I get to jump the queue to order my scotch, so who gives a shit? I yell out my order at the bar, and the barman looks around, startled, before finally looking down. At least, when he’s poured my drink, he pushes it over to the edge of the bar where I can reach it.