Growing up is hard enough, but it’s worse as a pacifist whose country is at war. Jim and Brian are neighbors, best friends, and high school graduates heading for college. In 1970 the Vietnam War raged, and Brian and Jim, both pacifists, worry about being drafted. To make matters worse, both men are gay and far from out. When Brian finally admits his feelings for his friend, he’s surprised and pleased Jim feels the same. Brian’s father teaches jujitsu, and the two men learn the ancient art, though neither believes in fighting. They struggle to overcome their pacifist tendencies amid racial tension and homophobia that threatens to tear their lives -- and their love -- apart. Can Brian and Jim turn fear into courage and learn to defend themselves, and each other, to create a life of love?

Fear and Courage

“There’s a big fight at my neighbor’s next door. It’s real bad and worse than usual. Someone said to put the knife down.” He gave the address and the dispatcher promised to send the police.


George’s voice took on a scary tone. “I should have done this a long time ago, you little queer-loving bastard.”


“George, nooo!” Jim’s mom shrieked.


Brian ran to his dad’s closet and grabbed the .38 revolver.


He ensured it was loaded, then ran to Jim’s house. He burst through the unlocked front door and found them in the kitchen. The shouting continued, and George had Jim by the hair bent backwards over the table with a knife to his bleeding throat.


“I’ll cut your heart out if you ever disrespect me again. Apologize.”


Fear flooded Jim’s face, but he gingerly shook his head.


Brian froze. Jim’s mother stared in silence, clashing her hands to her mouth. George slowly stroked the knife across Jim’s throat. Jim groaned. More blood flooded.


Chapter 65