I’m both surprised and not surprised at all by his condition. Not surprised because if no one is around to remind him to eat, this is inevitable. Surprised because, up until a second ago, I thought he didn’t want to be with me anymore. That he didn’t love me anymore.
I have tortured myself many nights with thoughts of him in the arms of another guy. Of his head thrown back in a passion caused by someone else than me. Of his huge brown eyes turned into melted milk chocolate as he cuddled close and used his hands and mouth to shower someone else with love.
What if David is right? What if Sammy did this to punish himself for breaking up with me? Then why do it in the first place?
We loved each other, of that I have no doubt. He showed me with his actions and his body even if he never said the words. Not even after I started saying them to him.