When Sam goes on a gay website looking for romance, he finds more than he bargained for. Rejecting all the usual requests for hook-ups, he searches for something more sincere. And he finds it in the most unexpected of places, as he is drawn to the profile of a man in a faraway place. Amir, an Algerian descended from desert nomads, has posted a profile looking for the love of his life. Sam finds it amazing that a gay man born in the Algerian desert has the bravery to not only declare he is gay, but also to admit his dream is to find a husband to spend his life with. While Sam doesn’t consider himself the marrying kind, he starts chatting with Amir, telling himself he just wants to learn about another culture. His friends laugh at him, saying this man just wants to use him to emigrate to the west and take him for his money. But he refuses to believe it, sensing a sincerity he has never seen with anyone else. The two begin a dialogue that moves to weekly Skype sessions, discussions of religion and world politics, assistance with life challenges and, finally, a declaration of love ... and an invitation. Can these two men from vastly different worlds and cultures meet and find common ground for a romance? The challenges are great, and spending a life together seems like an impossible dream. While Sam’s friends continue to discourage him, he knows he cannot give up this man. Is Amir sincere, or is Sam being used? There is only one way to find out if Amir is really sincere. And Sam knows what he has to do.

Not on My Bucket List

“They just used that as an excuse to reject you because they didn’t want to take the time to listen to you,” I told him. “My letter made clear that you had been invited as my guest, that I would pay for everything. Do you honestly mean to tell me that I can’t invite a friend from another country to visit me if he has no money?”


But that indeed appeared to be the case. A quick conversation with a co-worker whose wife was from Ukraine indicated that his wife had had the same experience when she invited a relative to visit this summer, even though she and her husband had visited Ukraine the previous summer. They were as baffled by the rejection as I was.


I didn’t know for sure how Amir was dealing with all this. Our communication temporarily stopped. But I entered a period of extreme depression. I remembered how I had watched him walking out of the airport at the end of my visit, wondering if I would never see him again. Now it appeared that would actually be true.


Chapter 44