Chapter 87

I loved you, too, old man.

* * * *

I sat on that porch for the rest of the evening and long into the night. I hadn’t checked my email since taking Ben to the hospital, and I’d turned off my phone. I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts and memories of him for a while.

By morning, I was starving. I hadn’t slept, but I wasn’t that tired. I wandered back to Ben’s old room. It still reeked of vomit, so I opened the windows and bagged up the sheets. The mattress was ruined, too. I’d have to get someone to pick it up. I had bittersweet memories of this bed, especially since it still leaned to one side.

Other than cleaning up his room, and the bathroom, I left everything else alone. I wasn’t ready to face packing up his stuff yet. I wanted to keep Ben near just a little bit longer. I walked slowly through the house, running my fingers along the walls, over the picture frames of photos we’d taken over the years at various festivals, town events, and school activities.