Chapter 1

“Excuse me. Can you tell me where to find the batteries?” I didn’t have much time because my lunch break was almost over.

The store clerk had his back to me where he kneeled on the floor, since he was stocking items on a lower shelf. As he straightened from his stooped position, I noticed he wore his hair closely shaved on the sides, with a blond mohawk that was about two inches tall. His uniform shirt was short-sleeved, so I could see the tattoos he had inked on both arms. They were really cool Celtic designs. He had an earring in both ears, but holes for more metal ran up and down the cartilage. For some reason he looked familiar, but I couldn’t place him.

When he turned to face me, I saw he had bright green eyes. I thought he was kinda hot, actually. But then, a look of recognition and shock came over his face, and he stared at me like he’d seen a ghost.

When he didn’t say anything after about ten seconds, I said, “I’m sorry, man, but I’m kind of in a hurry. Just point me in the right direction, okay?” I didn’t want to be rude, but I was in a hurry.

He lifted a shaky finger and pointed behind me. When I turned to look in that direction, I saw an end cap near aisle six that was full of batteries. Duh.

“Thanks,” I said.

I hurried over there, grabbed a packet of AAs, and headed to the cashier. After paying with cash, I thanked the woman behind the counter and jogged to the exit. Before I left the store, though, I felt eyes on me. I turned my head and saw mohawk-dude still staring at me. I didn’t have time to figure out why, since I had only a minute to dash across the street to get back to my job on time.

“Maureen, I’m back,” I announced fifty seconds later as I entered Shoe Haven.

Opening the door always triggered a bell to let the employees know when someone came into the store. My boss left the register stand and walked briskly toward me, her handbag swinging from her left shoulder. “It’s about damn time,” she said as she grabbed the batteries and cash from my hand. A ‘thank you’ would have been nice, but I didn’t hold my breath. “Clean up the kids’ shoe area and put the fifty percent off signs in the window while I’m gone. I’ll be back in half an hour.” Probably a lot later than that, actually, but it wasn’t worth my job—or her temper—to complain.

“Yes, ma’am,” I responded as she left the store in a hurry.

It took me most of the hour and a half she was actuallygone—no surprise there—just to clean up that part of the store. It was totally trashed. We got a lot of foot traffic from moms, dads, and nannies hauling recalcitrant kids into the store, looking for bargains. Maureen was always conveniently absent when the noise level ramped up, claiming paperwork duties in her office. I found that hilarious, since I did most of the paperwork anyway. I was always covering her ass.

As I placed the signs in the window, I thought about my life and just shook my head. Why was I working in a low-end shoe store for such a bossy, thankless bitch? Oh, right. I’d screwed up my life by daring to be gay.

* * * *

I thought back to my childhood. Once a rich kid, I’d never had to worry about money. Everything was paid for. The house I’d lived in was totally sweet and my room was practically an apartment on the upper level. If I needed money, I had a huge allowance.

But when I came out to my family the summer I turned eighteen, they cut me off and threw me out of the house.

I, who knew nothing about paying bills or making anything besides coffee, was thrust into an unbending world. My life as I had known it was gone in minutes. I had nothing but the clothes on my back—not even my wallet. I couldn’t go to my so-called friends in the neighborhood because they were cut from the same cloth as my parents. I was now a pariah in this world. But I wouldn’t change my mind. Faking my way through life had gotten old. I wanted to be able to respect myself, if nothing else.

The streets weren’t real friendly to a clueless guy like me, and I was taken advantage of quite a bit. Desperation made me learn real fast how to get by, though. Cardboard boxes to sleep on, garbage bags for protection against the rain. Church missions for a shower and food, sometimes a bed. When it was warm, there were places to sleep on the grass in parks, mostly hidden from security patrols. I learned to sleep lightly, and still did so even now.