The mid-40s are that time in a gay man's life when his major paradigm shifts from sexy to Sansabelts. But when Barry Grooms's partner of twenty years is killed on Barry's forty-fifth birthday, his world doesn't so much evolve as it does explode.<br><br>After navigating through the surreal conveyor belt of friends and family, he can't eat another casserole or swallow much more advice on what constitutes grief. Still numb, he leaves his homestore and design business in the care of others as he escapes to Key West, then New York. There he gets a thankless new job working for a crazy lady in a poncho, then has too many drinks with a narcissistic Broadway actor. Next it's a nude exercise class that redefines flop sweat, and from there he's on to a relationship with a man twenty years his junior.<br><br>Yet no matter how great the retreat from the man he used to be, life's gravity spins Barry back to the small town where he grew up for one more ironic twist that teaches him how to say goodbye with grace.

The Cool Part of His Pillow

“Mindy said you called about Luke and Duncan picking out something of Andy’s.”


I try to be casual. “I sure did. Dump your jackets on that chair, guys.”


Alexander tells them, “We won’t be that long.”


In comical slow motion, Duncan takes his zipper back up to his collar. Cursive writing was Duncan’s struggle last time I saw him. Now, it’s a general clumsiness from the knees down. Luke doesn’t in the slightest resemble his father or uncle. He’s shorter, his shoulders broader, biceps developed by free-weight curls.


“If you men want to head back to the library, we’ll take it from there.” They look at their father and hesitate. “Oh! It’s been awhile since you were here. The library is to your right, down the short stairway.”


“Come on, Dunc.” Luke hitches his head.


“I’m sorry about Uncle Andy,” Duncan says, very serious.


“Thank you, Duncan.” I smile. Duncan trots behind Luke.


Chapter 51