Chapter 4

God, he hoped not. Disappointed or not, he prayed he still had the capacity to care, to nurture, to love.

Suddenly all he wanted to do was sleep. He turned away from the window and resumed his journey to bed, feeling numb, unloved, and a little chilly. Ah, well, the heat would kick in to combat the open window. It wouldn’t be so bad.

In the bedroom, Jim undressed and stared outside. The driveway at the side of the house bore no evidence of where Barry’s pickup had been parked. The snow, falling heavily, had erased his tire tracks. It was as though Barry had never been there.

Jim wished the snow could do the same for his memory.

He pulled his clothes off and let the pieces land where they may. In one of his fantasies, he’d imagined undressing much the same way, as a kind of striptease, under the lustful gaze of his new love. He could even see it in his mind’s eye right now, and it felt like his heart broke a little when reality cut in, showing him this cursedly empty bedroom.