Chapter 45

Henry had only nodded because he had no idea what to say but he understood it was more than that. He didn’t know how to be part of a couple, how to love another person, which he knew was a perilous adventure in and of itself. He felt awkward and clumsy.

Now, in the grey-blue pre-dawn light, Henry still didn’t know what to say to Jamey. He smelled Jamey’s desire and his fear and his love. And that, Henry thought, just about summed up how things were between the two of them. Jamey had asked him out first, kissed him first, and then, after listening to his mother’s fears, embraced them and pulled away. Even though Henry knewthat Jamey’s mother was wrong, he envied Jamey having her, wanting to please her. Then Jamey had had a dream of desire and sex and they had made love in Larkin’s, and again in their bedroom in the safe house. Then he got scared again—and not just about this crazy quest.