It's been eleven years since Nick ran off with David for the West Coast. And though his life resembles a blue dream, after more than a decade of bar tending in resorts and cruise ships, Nick is finally thinking of heading home. First, he needs to go see about David in Vancouver ...<br><br>When he arrives, Nick finds a community of young men devastated by AIDS. Part of him wants to flee back to Montreal, but David is dying and Nick knows his place is by his best friend's side. In those four days and nights in David's apartment by the English Bay, Nick learns more about himself than he ever did before. When it's all over, he packs his bag and locks up his grief, determine to honor the promise he made to David of opening up his own restaurant.<br><br>Five years later, Nick is gaining a reputation in the industry as a chef, but has yet to have any meaningful relationships. Until Derek O'Reilly, that redheaded kid with the avocado-green eyes he used to know, walks into his dining room and ignites Nick's passion once more.

Blue Awakenings

Silent, he held my stare with dark gleaming eyes.


I thought of the last ten years, of the fear that had always pushed me to run from him. To hide from his devotion. To escape his admiration. I’d been so afraid to lose myself in him, in his magnificent hunger for me. Afraid of not being enough. Of coming up short of his great expectations.


Still quiet, almost resolved, David stared at me.


I had nothing left to say in my defence, but this. “I love you,” I confessed, admitted, conceded, and offered for the first time. “I’ve always loved you. You’re the only one I’ve ever loved.” I broke down again. “You’re the only one I’ll ever fucking love.”


Tears were filling his eyes, too. “No,” he said weakly, “you’ll love again.”


I shook my head. Grabbed his hand. “No. Never again.”


He closed his eyes, his cheeks flushing darker. He was obviously exhausted, my reckless outburst using up his precious strength. “It’s who you are,” he added, opening his eyes.


Chapter 12