Chapter 2

Sasha nodded, moving closer again, and Jim did as well, reaching out in hopes that Nathan might give up the knife. “That’s right. And you fell,” Sasha said, “right that second, Nate. You were gone. But now you’re back. You’re okay. Everything’s gonna be okay.”

The knife felt heavy in Nathan’s limp hand. He was still on guard, still waiting for them to reveal the lie. But when Jim’s hand closed around his to take the blade away, he couldn’t be strong anymore.

Nathan sunk forward against Jim, boneless, feeling the strange and forgotten comfort of his brother’s arms holding him up. He didn’t realize he was crying until he lifted his head just enough to speak and saw wetness on the shoulder of Jim’s shirt.

“Jim…” He tried to hold on, to cling and not be such dead weight, but he didn’t have any strength left. Jim had to hold all of him, and he did, as if it were the meagerest burden.

It was Jim. It was really him. Nathan breathed in and it even smelled like Jim, the way he hadn’t known his brother in so long.

Sasha. Nathan found the strength to look up to where he last remembered Sasha standing, and he was immediately scooped away from Jim into similarly strong and enveloping arms. He sank against Sasha just as eagerly, but when lips brushed his without warning, he flinched. There was a gasp in his throat as he looked up and saw blue, so beautiful, and that face gazing at him with all the emotions he had so deeply missed.

He wanted to banish the startled and pained look that flickered across Sasha’s face. He hadn’t meant to flinch. It had just been so long since he wanted such things. Since it mattered what he wanted. Tilting his head up, Nathan reconnected with those lips, kissing as deep and as desperately as he ever had. Sasha, loving him through skin, had those traitorous tears streaming down his cheeks like he was twelve years old all over again and the world would never be the same.

“Oh…yeah,” Nathan choked out, “that’s what that’s supposed to feel like.”

“Nathan…?” Sasha questioned in a breathless voice.

“Nathan,” Jim said, sounding angry and determined, “what did that bastard do to you?”

No. Nathan couldn’t bear for them to know the truth.

He opened his eyes, hands clenching too tight at Sasha’s biceps with most of his body still leaning against that stronger form in front of him. He shook his head. “I can’t…talk about that. P-Promise me…you w-won’t…ask me that.” His teeth were chattering again as the chills returned and wracked through his body. He shivered closer into Sasha’s arms.

“God, Nate, you’re freezing,” the incubus said, neither him nor Jim acknowledging that plea for a promise they couldn’t give.

“Yeah,” Nathan breathed into the familiar soft skin of Sasha’s neck, and that smell, that Sashasmell untainted. When he looked again at Sasha’s face, then at Jim’s, he couldn’t believe what his now focused eyes saw. “You don’t…look any different.”

They stared at him for a moment. “Nate,” Sasha said, “why would we look different, it’s only been…” He trailed, his eyes wide when he turned to meet Jim’s. “Damn it, the time difference. Nate, it’s…it’s only been a weekfor us. I guess it must have been longer for you.”

A year, Nathan thought, but he didn’t have the heart to tell them. “Yeah…guess I forgot it’d be shorter for you. Just a week, huh? Barely had time to miss me.” He hoped the grin he mustered looked something like his old one. He couldn’t quite remember how to form it.

“I could…make up a hot bath for you, get you warmed up,” Sasha suggested.

“That’d be awesome.”

“I should go tell everyone. They’re waiting downstairs,” Jim said, causing Nathan’s head to snap up again as he looked around at their surroundings.

They had kept the room dark for him, only a small lamp on and the light from the bathroom. “Are we…at a hotel?”

“Uhh,” Jim faltered and exchanged a look with Sasha. “No, Nate. We’re at the Gatehouse.”

“This is the room we stayed in before, remember?” Sasha said.

“Yeah…right. Did you say everyone’sdownstairs?” Nathan asked, not exactly liking the idea of meeting a crowd tonight.

“Don’t worry, Nate,” Jim smiled tightly in assurance. “We knew you wouldn’t want to be bombarded. That’s why it’s just us. Everyone wants to know you’re okay, but you don’t have to see anyone until you’re ready. You can stay in this room all week if you want. I’ll go let the others know you’re, umm…awake. Maybe we can order a bunch of pizzas or something. If you’re hungry?”

Nathan felt like he hadn’t eaten the entire time he’d been gone. “Heck yeah, Jim. I’m starved. Get some with everything on it, will ya? And I meaneverything. Even the crap I usually pick off.”

Jim laughed, and Sasha chuckled hesitantly with him, both sounding relieved, so relieved. Of course they were; their first experience with a saved Nathan Grier had been him threatening them with a knife and speaking nonsense they didn’t understand.