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Chapter 28

He just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t fake himself into living a life he barely remembered. He wasn’t that strong.

There was never a real destination in mind. He just drove. He hadn’t gotten all that far from Missouri really, having just passed some dinky town called Widener, Arkansas as he headed in the direction of Memphis. Half his time was spent in whatever motel seemed most out of the way, the other half in the car. He only thought to eat when he was halfway to passing out. Most of the time he didn’t even turn on the radio.

So it was deep into the twilight hour, three AM maybe, only local roads and no other cars in sight. Nathan had thought about turning around so many times, about picking up that phone whenever it buzzed. But he couldn’t. He didn’t belong with them anymore. He’d just ruin everything little by little until they hated him for it, until Sasha left because he didn’t remember how to love either, and Jim just gave up.