The fear

April 9, 2021

Sabinne Russell ON

age twenty one

I was on patrol at the time of chaos, I didn't have the courage to stop and help anyone, that was a huge disgrace to my police uniform. But the fear, he can dominate any human on earth, the fear of dying, that was certainly my worst sin.

I remember very little of what happened, I just remember seeing my partner being attacked when he got out of the car to help people who had fallen in the street. I had no reaction at the time, everything was in slow motion, how could a protest become so grotesque?

I ended up coming out of the trance with my German shepherd screaming, I think he wanted to wake me up to life, I quickly closed the car door with the gas pedal, I didn't want to die there, not that way.

I see people running up to cars and banging their heads against the glass to attack more people. One of these cars belongs to a family, there were three monsters trying to get in, the father saw my car and screamed in my direction.

- OFFICER, SAVE MY FAMILY - yells through the glass.

I only knew how to look at him without the courage to help.

Fuck it, I'll try to save them.

I throw the car towards the monsters and I manage to take down two, I take my gun and aim out the window, but I end up hitting it in the stomach, but the monster didn't even care, it looked like it was a tickle.

He got up and went to attack the family again.

I threw my car at the zombies again, but it seemed like the noise was just drawing more attention from more monsters. And several of them appeared out of nowhere to attack our cars, they gathered like a herd.

One of the monsters managed to break the window and bite the father, he was screaming in pain and his scream was shrill.

So the mother looked into my eyes and said

- I don't mind dying, just save my daughter - she said in tears.

Her swollen face from tears was a stark contrast during this situation.