VII (Part I)

What was that about?

I feel a sudden churn in my stomach. That was weird.

The elevator dings and I immediately enter it while trying to calm my nerves. I am still shaking. What was that about?

The door closes.

It was nothing, right?

I look at the numbers on the elevator and hug myself. I have decided to focus on the changing numbers while massaging my arms to ground myself down. I breathe in.

3...

I breathe out.

2...

I breathe in.

1...

I breathe out.

Ding!

The elevator door opens and now I am back at the lobby of The Passion House. I get out of the elevator and that's when I feel myself slowly calm down. You are okay now, Amy. Nothing will go wrong here, remember? This hotel wants to be your safe space. Your mom is having the time of her life in the casino.

I head towards the door of the Iodestone. The lobby is shining yet empty as how it should be. I can't seem to see Jane anywhere, too. There is no evidence that there is a life outside this realm and there is a huge party going on beyond that door of the Iodestone. Everything seem so calm and collected. I allow myself to enjoy this unreal serenity beyond me before I turn the knob.

Entering the Iodestone, the party is still in full blast. I look down from the patio and see people enjoying the time of their lives. I can't seem to find Stacey and Yohanne among the crowd. I look at the DJ booth and see Melvin kissing Steven.

I smile at the realization. That's love in its purest form.

I decide to not go down and walk straight to the casino. I go towards the hallway Jane has told my mom earlier.

In contrast to the usual hallways we have found in the hotel, this path is dim-lit and the walls are painted in wine-red color and have black swirling patterns and black carpet. It is very sophisticated. It feels like I am about to enter a red room.

My imagination starts to run wild. I can imagine my mom hanging out with her newfound friends while playing a game where our money will never dry out. She will be drinking wine and having a chitchat with people just like I have. Or maybe make-out with a stranger- the thought of Harris comes to my mind.

It has been nothing, right? It was nothing more than just casual sex. We both know that tomorrow, we might not remember what happened. He'll just be another blurry dream for me and it is the same for him, too.

I shake my head to forget the thought and continue walking until I reach a cherry wood double door. I notice that it is quite ajar and the lights are out on the other side. I pause and try to listen if there is a happy hour going on beyond it. But there's nothing else there except silence. I push it forward and I get surprised with what I see.

The place is dark.

Or shall I say, dark is an understatement? It's pitch black - like an empty canvass. It is like a room that has not been made. Like an empty imagination. I cannot identify the floor, nor the ceiling, nor the walls. It's like a vacuum. I try to open the door wider to allow light to enter but it seems like it eats the light that it receives. My head begins to numb as my hands begin to get cold.

I know I should run. But I can't. I stand there frozen just outside the door.

My Mom is here. I tell myself. I feel my body immediately shifts and go autopilot.

"Mom?" I call out to her.

There is no response but utter silence. I get so nervous. My body trembling with fear.

"Mom?" I step forward to enter the room and I feel a floor. Among this darkness, I take this as assurance I will not fall anywhere near me. I continue to slowly walk inside and drag my feet on the ground- in case I will bump into something. I should do everything in my resources to navigate this black room. I look back and I see the lit opening that I know will always be the door - in case I will have to run, I can always rely on the exit.

This is just a dream, Amy. Nothing bad is going to happen, right?

I continue treading forward in this blinding darkness, calling out to my mom. Swinging my hands on the air, I eventually feel a cold hard solid thing beyond me. I cling to it and notice that it is a chair. I reach out beyond it and notice that there is a table and on top of it has a circle of almost plastic coins that I make out to be casino chips.

What is going on?

Why is it so dark here?

Questions keep popping into my mind. I continue walking until my feet bump into something soft.

Where is my Mom?

I feel it move. I sit down to reach it until I feel a pair of hands weakly holding on to my wrist.

"R-run," I fall to my back as surprise wash over me. I feel my head throb and my earring. What is happening? "T-they are going to kill everyone." It is a woman. But she is not my mom.

"Get yourselves out of here," She says before collapsing. Immediately, her hands turn cold. Is she dead?

I immediately feel a cold gust of air encircling me, which is unusual because there since I came here, I have not felt a single vent where air can pass through in this cold night.

Come, I hear a whisper. "Come to me." I feel a gust of cold air on my face and that's how I notice my blood drain me and weaken my knees. My instinct screams for me to rush out towards the door - which I did- where I have entered and immediately close it behind my back while panting.

What was that? I sit down on the floor and my back on the now-closed door. I look at the hallway beyond me as I try to calm myself down.

This is all just a dream, Amy. It's not real. That may be a part of your imagination. It is like a hiccup in a system. I try to assure myself.

Yeah, right. All I need to do is to find my mom and wake up.

I hold on to this assurance that everything is alright because this is just a dream.

Because that's what they say.

And this pathway is proof.

I can still go back to my room and find the mirror.

All of these will end once I wake up.