Rose laid on her back, tucked her hands underneath head and sighed. "It sure is a perfect day for a picnic."
Rick laid down beside her. "I know, that's why I chose it."
She looked at him. "So..."
"So..."
"How are you?"
He reached out and tucked a strand of her hair. "Happy."
"You're sure?"
He nodded. "Mmm hmm."
"The Nightmares?"
"They ended when you said yes."
"Be serious, Rick."
"They have not been frequent."
"How often?"
"I haven't had any for over a month. You have been keeping my mind busy."
She smiled. "Be serious, Rick."
"But I am serious." He tapped her nose. "And when I do have, they are not as vivid as they used to be."
"What do you always dream of?"
He looked away. "The ambush. Our captain shouting for us to retreat. The gunshots everywhere." His voice went quieter. "Zayne and Buck getting shot. Me reaching out but never getting to them and everything goes down in a black hole of frustrating torment."
"You still think you could have saved them, don't you?" She asked after a moment.
He went quiet. "Yes, I still do."
"Do you not think it is about time you forgive yourself?"
"I think I still need to go through this penance."
"By keeping yourself under torment?"
"I know it sounds crazy." He lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "But that's how I feel."
"Well, you feel wrong."
He looked at her. "You do know that sentence is grammatically incorrect, right?"
She groaned. "Rick!"
He held up a hand. "Okay. I'm sorry."
"I'm serious."
He tugged on her earlobe. "I know."
"There is nothing you could have done to have stopped those bullets, Rick, nothing you could have done to save Zayne and Buck."
He searched her eyes, his eyes soulful.
She cupped his face and stroked it with her thumb. "Nothing."
He shut his eyes, tears slipping down the corner of his left eye.
She stroked his hair.
His shoulders shuddered. He exhaled slowly out of his lips.
"I know the thoughts are running through your head."
He peeped at her and smiled. "You know me too well."
"But the truth, Rick, is you could not have stopped that ambush. You all did not see it coming, that is why it is called an ambush."
That made him smile.
"The truth is you couldn't have stopped those bullets from hitting Zayne and Buck. You were probably few feet away from them."
"I was."
"The truth is you couldn't have stopped Zayne and Buck from dying. And the truth is you are not guilty for being alive. You are not."
He cupped her face. "I love you, Rosie Ann Hokins."
It's mutual, my love.
He leaned and pressed a long kiss to her forehead.
She felt his heart in the kiss. Not just that she felt the healing in it.
"You hungry?"
"Mmm hmm."
He sat up and pulled her up. He pulled the basket close and took out the lunch she had packed.
As they ate, a young soldier and a lady walked past them. She watched Rick, noting the nostalgia and longing that flooded his face.
He turned and caught her watching him. He smiled. "I'm fine, Rosie."
She kept staring at him.
"I am fine." He leaned in and kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Rosie."
******
Bonnie flipped the closed sign, came over to where she was and sat down on the second chair. "I've been meaning to ask, how do you think Rick is doing?"
"I think he is doing well, not completely where he is supposed to be, but he is making progress."
"Is he still grieving? Is he still scared that he will open his eyes one day and you will be gone?"
"Grieving, yes. Still scared, yes but not to the degree as it was before. I think he is really trying hard and he is making progress. I am proud of him."
Bonnie smiled and nodded. "That is what matters. Are you still skeptic of pursuing a relationship with him?"
She bit her lip. "A bit."
Bonnie waited for her to explain.
"I still think it will affect our friendship."
"Not if it works out. I know that everyday as this thing between you and Rick becomes serious, the fear of losing your friendship and all that you have shared gets starker before your eyes. But keep and guard your mind in positivity. Not because you are blinding yourself to the pessimistic reality, but because you are choosing what to believe. And you are choosing what to believe, because you know that what you believe in affect the way you respond to everything around you. Since, we would rather that everything turn out positively, let's start working on how we think. Okay?"
She nodded. "Okay."