Devil

In the beginning, there was one lover, one young man - he knew seduction, at least he thought and two ladies - one who wasn't sure what she was, still trying to find her young soul, and the lover being the other. But this is not the beginning, it's before.

Jay is sitting up on his bed talking his last words on the phone. Qara facing the other side has her eyes open but her ears more than her eyes. She is struck, by thunder-by words. She regrets every second she lies there naked. Her poor choice of men. The beginning and end of her joyous joy.

As it is the neighborhood is not so silent. But in this room, everyone is 'asleep'. The silence is so loud a pin drop wouldn't be heard. Maybe they are consulting their demons.

' My dear demon,' Qara converses, ' how dark is this man? Are you strong enough to subdue him?'

' Chief devil,' Jay converses, 'how do I make her stay for the rest of the night? Maybe the rest of the other nights till whenever?'

The music from the campus backyard is yelling for help. God is asleep. Everyone is sinning with whatever - whoever they can. Good intentions are covered with failure, doom maybe. Is the devil in charge tonight? I'd like to have a word. Warn him of the whip at the temple. Or the eternal fire at the end of our dying days. But he knows, I think.

Jay Jay. He was cowardly according to Qara, kind of courageous but she was sure she had something for him. A 'click'? Love at first sight maybe. Love of bad character is a major possibility. He hid his fears in courage, Qara believed. The seamless way he approached females, the very way he approached her. Unlike her who schemed and planned for what she wanted, made Qara believe Jay was a hideous coward. Hiding in plain sight. In the name of courage. He'd use your scare to his advantage.

Women love tough men. According to Jay. Not all but most. An upside to his intentions. Qara was an experiment. A failed but well-performed experiment. He had stories. Tons of them. He told her none. He had all the time. Made do what he could. He was reserved for the night. Qara believed him with miniature words. He believed. A weird belief. Was it Jay, or was it Qara that seduced the other? Very hard to tell. Both of them were alphas. They looked up and down at each other. A kind of relationship that lasts. I'd love it for myself but only if I don't have to take six years to heal.

Jay had thoughts for Lisa. He only needed to speak to her with the politeness he had to learn from wherever.

'... And maybe Lisa, when you heal, you'll learn you are a lover and maybe I'm not. Maybe not for you. And I never drove you into loving because already you were one. No matter how numb you say you were before we met. A good thing but very bad in the end. So please trot on.

And so you know I'm not an ounce sorry for whatever happened. You learned your lessons from this relationship. You've become a better person. I've learned mine as well. Next time I'll switch off my phone. I'll be a better person. At least for the person, I'll be with in the room at that minute.

And please before you cry or rather interrupt my intellectual self, know you are an amazing soul. That's why I gave you a place to express how weak you can be, through love. It's been too real for my imagination. But that's what it takes to grow. The element of surprise.'

He thought less of himself after playing this conversation in his mind. he was a man. But a man enough? Maybe not. This decision depends on your masculinity. How toxic had he become? Not enough.