You

After drinking the indigo liquid, I grab the pen next to a tray and a sheet of paper. Then I begin to write,

Dear John, yes I said John, what's the use of calling you father when you've never been one to me? By the time you're reading this note, I'd be long gone and I don't mean another country or city- but the place you've always wanted me to go, hell. Now do not be mistaken, this isn't a suicide note, rather, homicide. I didn't kill my mama, hers was complication but you know who killed me huh? It's you all. You people murdered me, well it's not like I was alive anyways, because I was a walking dead, empty shell and you vicious people made me that.

John, thank you for always reminding me that I'm worthless, thank you for punishing me for all the things I know nothing of, for rubbing off the child you didn't fathered in my face (that's a dick move though) Yeah, I can swear now. It's quite unfortunate that you couldn't be the father mama wanted you to be, but it's all good because I'm proud to say you're just a sperm donor.

I finally came to terms that my father died the day my mother left this sinful world, you're just a replica of him, you're a hollow shell or maybe I'm the hollow shell but at least, the beatings ends today. I can't deal with the abuse anymore, congratulations you managed to break me at last!

Leslie, I realised you are very insecure, you aren't contented. God! You wanted more and when you saw that another girl has it, you decided to make her feel unwanted and guess what? You succeeded, I'm finally out of your hair.

Martha, when John brought you home, sorry I meant 'his home', that place was never a home to me, I had thought that God finally answered my prayer, he gave me a mother I longed for, what I didn't know was that, God was toying with me or maybe it was the devil. I should have known though, I mean the first day I met you, you had on designer stuff, Prada bag been amongst it and it's said that "Devil wears Prada."

You know I feel sorry for you Martha, I really do, your own child doesn't respect you and even had the conscience to sleep with your husband. You probably don't know that part, well your precious daughter slept with John or 'sleeps' because I don't think it's a one time thing and oh she's pregnant, it's John's baby. Congratulations grandma.

Jake or rather, 'Jerk'. You are the person I detest the most, funny because I think John should hold that title. You people took everything, every last inch of my happiness, my self esteem, my sanity and finally, my soul. But Jake, you took the one thing that I never planned on letting go of anytime soon, my virtue and for that, I'll never forgive you, I'll never forgive all of you.

I remember that day vividly, Jake, I begged you to stop, I thrashed, I turned, I screamed, I whimpered but you were hell bent on stripping me of every last bit of my dignity, stripping me of the last thing that covers for you all's inflicted abuses. For all the times you touched me without my consent, I promise you shall regret it, bit by bit. Trust me on that.

And finally, to John's neighbours, infact the whole neighbourhood, all students of Chaste high, I'm gone, the stick girl is gone, you can finally breathe a non-toxic air that isn't filled with her germs. I wish you all a safe life without 'the curse.' I hope y'all can sleep better at night now.

Chase, thank you for staying by my side even when I continued to push you away, I'm eternally grateful. The love you've shown me, I'll never forget. You're my rainbow after it rains, people like you are very rare and I know I'm selfish, but it is what it is. Wounds may heal but the scars are etched forever, it breaks my heart anytime I flinch from your touch even though it's not your fault, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for bringing you this much pain, I pray someone takes that pain away from you. I'm grateful I loved and knew one good thing before my demise, I'm grateful you walked into my life the exact time you waltzed in, I'm grateful to be your hospital room partner, I'm grateful to be your friend Chase, you're the one thing I've done right. I know I may seem as a bitch for leaving you now that I own your heart, I'm sorry. I promise, you'll meet someone that will make you laugh twice as I did, the one you can tell your worries to and not get judged because you deserve it. You deserve every good thing in this life, I love you. Please fill my tomb with daisies, I'd really appreciate it.

I exhale as I drop the pen, tears flowing freely on my face. I admit, this is a coward decision, but I have nothing to live for anymore, maybe I might reconnect with my mama and be happy.

I can't help but think I'm making a grave mistake, in all honesty, I've been dead for a long time so it's no biggie now.

Suddenly, a sharp pain pierces my lower belly, I scream out in pain. There's no one to help me, I don't even want to be helped.

This is it!

"Stop!" Chase yells, panting heavily. He must have ran here when he got my frantic text.

Droplets of blood drips from my nose, "It's too late, I love you." I whisper.

No more bullies, abusive parent, condescending peers. Finally, I can be free from it all and I'm positive that this time, I'll be fine and with that, I lose consciousness, only this time, I won't be getting it back.