Chapter 7

It was over. Her relationship with Magnus had come to an end. She knew a great storm would happen one day, but she didn't expect it to come very soon, and that it would force them to break apart so abruptly. She walked home with a blank stare and an empty heart. The sky above her was getting dark. From a distance, lightning struck following by a loud thunderstorm. People rushed to escape themselves from the coming rain, but she remained slow. Some of the people stared at her in confusion, yet they were passing her without breaking pace.

From the opposite direction, came a familiar sight. Magnus was walking toward her. He smiled and waved at her. Her heart ached as if it was squeezed by a cold fist. She didn't have a heart to say goodbye to him. She knew she would never be strong enough to lose him. She fought back the tears and turned away, running to another direction.

"Ava, wait!" In a second, he already caught up, he grabbed her wrist and turned her to face him.

"Why are you running away from me? Have I done something wrong?"

She couldn't hold back her tears when she heard his voice, the tender care in his tone. She sucked in her breath and closed her eyes. She couldn't abide looking into his eyes when saying this.

"I... I can't... I cannot meet you again, Magnus. We must stop seeing each other from now..."

"No!" He exclaimed at once.

"But we should!"

"Why?!!!" He pulled her toward him so hard their body crashed.

"The duke... I've met him this morning. He sent me a message with your name, to meet at the studio. I thought it was you... He knew we were there yesterday..."

"Damn!!! That fucking bastard! What did he do to you?"

"He told me not to see you again, ever. And if I dare to disobey his order, he will tell my father and Roger. Magnus, you know I'm bound to Roger by law. If he ever found me, nothing could stop him from taking me..."

"No!!! I will never let him, nor any man take you from me!"

He pulled her again closer until her breasts pressed tightly against his chest.

"I can't lose you. I swear I will protect you, as long as I live, no man can ever touch you."

Then he claimed her mouth in a desperate kiss. She was spellbound by his oath. Her lips parted to welcome his warm, silken tongue. The kiss was lingering under the heavy rain, and when he finally broke the kiss, she knew that he only wanted more.

Without a word, he held her hand and they both ran into a barn nearby. The barn was empty, poorly lit and a little bit damp, but it was quite clean. There was some haystack to rest upon in the corner. She walked toward the haystack, he followed behind her in silence. When she turned to him, the fire in his eyes made her heart stop.

He captured her mouth again in a deep, passionate kiss, his tongue plunging deep into her mouth. Despite the biting cold, a burning heat in the bottom of her belly melted her core, spreading a blazing fever all over her. Her body went limp and her muscles relaxed. He broke the kiss and pushed her gently to lay on the haystack.

"I want to make you mine..." He bent down atop her and whispered to her ear. His warm breath tickled the sensitive skin around her neck and every fiber in her being was awakened in anticipation. He loosened the string of her bodice then tugged her white blouse down to her belly.

"God, you're beautiful." His eyes glittering in excitement and she felt her face blazed.

"I can stay here forever just looking at you." He caressed one side of her breast with his knuckle. Totally embarrassed, she covered herself with her hands. He made a quiet laugh and shoved her hands away, lowering his head to lick a delicate peak. She gasped at the unexpected intimate contact, then she felt his bristled jaw rubbed against her soft skin as he brought the translucent tip into his mouth. His wicked tongue circling around the pink areola, licking and sucking the erected nipple, while his other hand pleasured another breast, fondling and pinching the tiny bud. She moaned between short breaths, writhing desperately beneath him. Her soaking core throbbed violently in aching need.

Her eyes opened abruptly when he cupped the pulsing heat, the secret place no one had ever touched. He pulled back from her and spread her legs wide, kneeling between her thighs.

"Magnus..." She whispered his name in surprise. She watched open-mouthed as he began to unbutton his pants. A sudden awareness shot through her and she pulled her legs together, trying to rise on her elbows. He held her back, pushing her gently until she lay on her back, then spread her legs again. She muttered a quick protest, but he silenced her with a hungry kiss, then blazed her throat with a trail of hot kisses and made his way down to her chest, between her breasts, lower to her belly.

"You belong to me..." The faint touch of his scratchy-textured chin left her skin tingled. "I want to claim you, I want to mark you as mine..."

His tongue circled around her navel, making her arched immediately, then it plunged into the tiny hole and she squirmed against his weight.

"I want to make love to you."

"But would you marry me at once, after... after I give myself to you?"

He halted and lifted his gaze to meet hers.

"Don't worry, sweetheart. I promise I won't get you pregnant, I'll be very careful."

Her eyes widened in shock to hear his answer.

"That is... that is not what I mean. Magnus, do you really love me?"

"With every beat of my heart."

"Would you... would you fight for me, against all odds?"

"Absolutely."

"If you really love me so, Magnus, would you marry me? Soon..."

"Ava," He halted for a moment. Seemed like he was struggling to find some words. "I will take care of you, I swear."

"But would you marry me?" She persisted.

Running his fingers through his hair, he took a deep breath and sat upright before her. She rose and pulled up her blouse, starting to tie up the strings clumsily.

"I can give you anything you want. Anything at all. I can give you everything you need. I will protect you from any harm, I will keep you safe with me. All you have to do is to put your trust in me."

"Answer me, Magnus. Would you marry me?"

He sighed regretfully before answered

"Not in the near future, my love. No."

Suddenly she could feel the bone-chilling cold surrounding her, filling her. Her heart sank into a sore disappointment.

"So, you never planned to marry me, not at all, did you?"

"It's not like what you think. I just... Come here, my love..."

He reached her, but she shrugged his hand off and stood up, walking across the barn.

"Ava..."

"Goodbye Magnus."

He stormed toward her, encircled her waist and turned her to face him.

"Don't leave me like this. I love you."

He pulled her into his arms and held her tight.

"Marriage is... it's not something you can decide overnight, Ava. I cannot just leave everything and marry you... There are many things to consider... I have family, my parents... and that pompous bastard, Ashton... Like it or not, he has power over me..."

He drew back, his hands still holding her arms. He looked into her eyes.

"But I do care about your security and welfare. Look, I have a lovely little manor at Nouvelle, the closest little town from here. It's not as palatial as Vermont Manor, but it's beautiful, far better than the broken little cottage you're living in now. You can bring Polly there, she may very well like it. You don't have to work and make your pretty hands dirty anymore. I will provide you with everything you need. Money, servants... lots of them..."

Ava froze on her feet when she realized what he was offering.

"You can buy anything you want as much as you please... I will be visiting you by the end of the week, and you can spend your time doing anything you want while I'm away..."

He tilted her chin, angled her to meet his gaze. "I can't wait to build our life together there. My family won't bother as long as we keep discreet and out of their sight."

She felt a sting of pain and closed her eyes. Why did it seem impossible to escape the hands of fate? Was the curse too strong to be broken? Was it her destiny to follow the path of her ancestors?

"No, Magnus. I'll never be your mistress. I'll never be any man's mistress."

"Don't get me wrong, my love. I don't intend to buy you. I know you will never set a price for your love. You know I love you and respect you as well. But we have no other way. If we want to stay together, it's the best we can do."

"No, Magnus. I'd better leave you than being your mistress. I've promised myself, no matter how hard life might be, no matter how impossible it might seem, I'll never choose that path. I will never be called whore, and my children will never be called bastards."

She pushed him and sidestepped around him. He grabbed her hand.

"I never give a damn about whatever people think, I'll never see you as a whore. Why do you care about people's false opinions rather than what's real and true between us? I know it would not run smooth for us, but I'm willing to stay because I love you. You said you love me, isn't it worth a little sacrifice?

"I do love you." She turned to face him. "But I can never be your mistress. My conscience wouldn't allow me, no matter how much I love you. Even if I don't care about the people, you think I would be happy knowing one day you would be married to another woman? I'm not a woman who shares my man."

Magnus gave her a desperate look.

"But I can't let you go. I love you so much. Tell me what should I do to keep you by my side?"

"Marry me, Magnus. Soon. The duke has made it clear that if I meet you ever again, he would call Roger and my father. If they find me, Roger will be taking me at once. He has the right. I'm bound to him in a legal contract that the king himself couldn't break it. If you think I'm worth a little sacrifice, marry me soon. But if you think otherwise, leave me now and never look back."

"If I could choose, I swear I would marry you, a thousand times if you like. But I can't... I would be banned forever from my family, I would be deprived of all my birth rights, it would cause a great deal of scandal, and..." He ceased talking when he saw her hurtful expression.

"Don't! Don't think I choose my noble life over you... Be sensible, Ava. If I were to be stripped of my privileges, you would not like it as well. Ashton would cut off my allowance and I could provide you nothing."

"I'm not afraid to live a simple life, we can work..." she stopped when he shook his head.

"It's impossible."

"You've made your choice." She turned away.

"Ava, wait! All right, I will marry you now, you tell me how!"

"We should leave to Gretna Green tonight. It's the only way... If we are married by law, your family, even the duke would no longer be able to separate us, and the contract that bound me would be void."

"Gretna Green, you mean... eloping?"

"Yes, I don't need you to give me a house full of servants and a lot of money, Magnus. I love you, not the conveniences and privileges that come with you. We can move to another town and live far from your family. All I need is you and only you."

"I'm sorry, love. I don't think it's a good idea..."

She took a step back. "So... I guess we're saying goodbye..." she turned away, but he reached her again.

"Ava, wait. I have a better idea. After I finish my lesson with the captain, I will challenge Ashton a duel. If I win, the prize is freedom to choose my own bride. I will marry you in a honorable way..."

"And if you lose?"

"I will not lose. Not this time. I need you to trust me, promise me you will wait for me..."

"For how long?"

"I don't know, but it won't be long. A few months maybe..."

"So you're going to make me wait in uncertainty? Without knowing when I will see you again..."

He breathed harshly in frustration.

"Ava, don't push me too far... I'm not ready for anything you're asking me to do. Besides, I still have some unfinished business here. I have to finish what I've started with the captain. I have lessons to complete. The marriage thing... the elopement idea is just..." He halted, seemed beaten and tortured.

"I can't take too much a distraction now. I really need to do this, I need to prove that I can be better than Ashton, at least in one thing."

His voice firm and determined at the statement, not uncertain and doubtful like when he was answering her demand. Until now, she had never known how bad the bitter rivalry had consumed him.

"I can't put my life at stake, Magnus... Even if you win, I don't think you can marry me so easily..."

He gave a painful sigh.

"Then think about Nouvelle. It's the best I can offer you for now. And believe me, it's the best any man can offer you."

She felt as if a thousand tiny sharp points pricking her heart inside and it was bleeding all over.

"I swear I will make you happy. To me you will always be my wife in every way that matters. Don't care too much about the people. They don't know the least bit about us. Don't give up what we have just to escape people's rotten judgement..."

She released her hand from his grip and made a long, hasty step out of the barn, into the heavy rain.

"So people's opinions matter more to you than our love?!!" She heard him shouting behind her, but he didn't stop her this time.

"All right! I promise I will come to you soon after I defeat him!" He shouted again.

"But if you change your mind, you know where to find me!"

*****

Dark clouds were laying heavy on her heart. There had been no sunshine since they had been apart. The sun still rose and shone every morning just the same as it did yesterday, but she couldn't feel the light nor the warmth. She was empty inside, on her own.

She didn't know which hurt her more. That they couldn't see each other anymore or that he couldn't make her more than his mistress.

She was such a fool. What made her think he would ever plan to marry her? Moreover, what made her think he would be willing to run away with her, leaving his privileged life behind and never looked back? She wasn't worth it. He was right, what he offered was the best any man could offer her. She was nothing but a pariah, she wasn't fit for any decent man, let alone the nobility. In her naivety she thought she could climb higher than any of the women of her family, but the truth was she could never escape the filth that ran in her blood, imprinted in her genes. She had no right to convince him to marry her. There was no one to blame but her, she had known it from the first time she found he was a nobleman. Still, the realization that he wanted nothing but an illicit affair with her broke her heart to pieces.

Part of her understood Magnus couldn't make a choice that would change his life drastically. But still, it disappointed her very badly. She told herself over and over again that it wasn't his fault. That she was the one who had fallen to a blind expectation. A delusive idea that he would give anything to be with her, that he would fight the world for her. She was such a pathetic halfwit.

At this time, she remembered what her mother once told her.

"There are circumstances I cannot change, I wish things could be different, but life doesn't work that way. I'm thankful that I knew what I wanted the most, and I took the chance. It had taken me all my life to discover this. Be content with what you have, and what you can have. Don't ask for too much, otherwise you'll lose your only chance."

Days turned to weeks, weeks turned to months. With the passing time, she found that everyday things got easier to accept. Her tears had ran dry and her despair gradually faded. Still, she didn't find a reason to be happy like before. She didn't find a reason to wake up every morning and meet the new day with joyful heart. She lived everyday the same way she did before, eating, sleeping, doing her chores. She was simply a breathing shell, alive yet dead inside. She did everything without any interest or intention, just keeping up with her life because it was the only way she knew. She never saw Magnus again ever since, nor received a message from him. Sometimes she imagined he would come unexpectedly, by her bedroom window, in front of her house, in the street, and many more. She had fantasized many different versions of his comeback, but none of them happened. People said time would heal everything. Perhaps one day she would. For now, all that she knew was just to survive another day.

*****

"Coming!" Polly wiped her dirty hands to her apron as she raced to the door. From the brutal knocking out there, seemed like there was some serious matter. The door swayed open and Lady Byrne and three local women appeared in the doorway. "Who is that?" Ava came out from her bedroom. Lady Byrne hurried toward her and took her hand, dragging her out of the house. Meanwhile, the other women had driven Polly out in front of her.

"Hurry up dear!! We don't want to miss the parade! It will begin in less than half an hour!"

"What parade?"

"Today is the duke's engagement day! It has been a tradition in this land, every engagement and wedding of the duke or his firstborn will be celebrated with a parade across the main road, passing the townsquare and back to the manor. I bet it will be a great spectacle!"

The other women babbled on behind her.

"Oh, I cannot wait to see the lady. I wonder if she is as beautiful as what people say?"

"All their family member will join the parade. I really want to see Princess Charlotte, mother of the bride. Can you imagine, a princess!!!"

After everything that happened in the past, the duke was the last thing she wanted to think of. He was the bane of her life, and now she was expected to join the celebration of his happy moment. She was thinking of a good reason to escape when a thought crossed her mind. If the couple's family member would be there, perhaps she could see Magnus. She missed him very much. If she could have a sight of him only for a split second... She followed the lady into the street and tried to show a proper interest in the topic.

So, the duke was going to get married. She could hardly believe it. She couldn't imagine him being someone's husband. Somehow, it didn't suit him. He was like... a lone wolf, a solitary man. He was on his own even when he was surrounded by his people. He was never part of any crowd. It was hard to imagine him together with someone.

The lady kept talking relentlessly, like she never ran out of excitement.

"Do you know His Grace's betrothed is the king's niece?! What a great match! The Hydes was one of the oldest royal family in England. They have the bluest of blood. Their men are said to be fit for a queen!"

No wonder he was so conceited about it. Now he was going to marry a princess.

"I can't wait to see the next duchess, lady Selene Wyndham. People said her beauty has no equal. People called her Venus from Wales!"

The babbling continued for about ten minutes later. Finally they reached a public garden located uphill, on the opposite side of the townsquare, a strategic place to have a great view of the street below. Lady Byrne lead them to the place that she claimed as "has the best view of the whole spectacle". The crowd had flooded the area, clearly the parade was one of the most highly anticipated event in this quiet town. The old lady seemed to be very well-known among the villagers, since they moved in respectful manner to give the lady and her companions way upfront. Soon they made their way to the front line.

"Ah, Nora! How delightful to see you here!"

Lady Byrne greeted a woman standing there in the front line.

"Let me introduce my friends, Miss Ava and Miss Polly Banks. This is Madam Nora."

Ava nodded politely to the older woman while another villager greeted Lady Byrne, distracting her away. Madam Nora was a middle-aged Gypsy woman. She let her long, dark hair tumbling free, with ropes of beads entwined through the locks. She dressed in a black Gypsy clothing, wearing necklaces, bracelets and rings all over her. The woman glanced at Polly shortly before shifted her gaze to her. She looked at her intensely with a pair of night black eyes. They held a mystical aura that somehow got her pulse quickening. Ava thought the woman was going to turn away after a moment, but she remained still, staring at her longer than proper.

"You're no ordinary woman, Miss." The woman's eyes glinting with interest. "You were born and raised in silver and gold. You were clothed in silk and satin. God knows the reason you are here now, dressed as a peasant, make your hands dirty with some farmer's job. But it won't last long. Your situation now is only for a short period of time, for you are destined for nobility. You will live a long and prosperous life in grace and honor."

A fortune teller! What a perfect timing. When her life seemed to lose its path. All she needed now was a clue. Her heartbeat racing faster to hear the truth in the prophecy about her past. It was impossible this woman had known her before.

Ava looked around quickly. Fortunately Lady Byrne and Polly were distracted by the village women. They were busy chatting and peering at the direction of the royal parade. Nobody heard what Nora said before.

If her prophecy was true, could it be...? Magnus' face flashed in her mind. Perhaps they would be together at last, after overcoming the obstacles. She turned back to Nora.

"Will I ever get married?"

"Certainly" Nora answered without a shadow of doubt. "Soon..."

Before she could ask another question, the crowd cheered loudly in high excitement. In an instant, all eyes centered to the march in the distance.

First came a rigid formation of guards, all looked mighty and gallant in their complete uniform, riding their horses, opening the way for the noble family's parade. The guards were passing by, row upon row and the village maidens watching in the front line screamed and giggled in girlish excitement.

What coming next was even more breathtaking. Inside the sophisticated barouche, the duke looked exceedingly handsome in his formal attire. For the first time, Ava saw him wearing a formal hat. It was impossible but he looked more beautiful than ever. The hat kept his eyes in shades, but it just made the blue orbs looked even more striking.

"My God! I can't believe my eyes! The lady is insanely beautiful!" Somebody exclaimed from behind her.

Instantly, Ava moved her gaze to the lady next to him. Sitting elegantly beside her dashing fiancé, Lady Selene Wyndham was an epitome of beauty and grace. Ava had never seen anything quite like her. She was... perfection. The lady had a classic beauty of an aristocratic woman. She had a heart-shaped face with a pair of almond-shaped eyes, with thick and long lashes framed her sapphire blue orbs. Her straight and narrow nose pointed high, Ava imagined a little bird could perch on it, and her thin lips were taut, seemed like she was not into humor and hilarity. Her hair was a blonde color in the lightest shade that her pale forehead seemed to merge with her hairline. She wore sapphires in her hair and neck, matching her eyes and her light blue gown in an understated elegance.

The following barouche brought Princess Charlotte and Lord Wyndham, and the last one brought Lord Carlton and Lady Cecily. Ava didn't saw Magnus there. Apparently he didn't join the parade. His parents were a beautiful and elegant pair. Ava recognized a significant resemblance to Magnus in his father's face, but his father's eyes were cold and calculating just like the duke, and his expression held no sign of humor. His wife was no different, she held her chin up and lowered her lashes, gazing into the distance as if the crowd wasn't worth the least bit of her attention. Ava could not imagine the way they would have looked at her if Magnus ever introduced her to them.

Another formation of guards in uniform following behind the barouches in the same numbers like the first one. The crowd hailed the noble family in great excitement.

"Blessings on the fair ruler!"

"God bless the betrothal!"

The duke turned to the crowd and waved a hand to greet his people. His lady followed him, waving gracefully like a queen. None of them smiling, yet they still charmed the people exceedingly. The couple looked fantastic and equally fit to each other.

A strange, incomprehensible feeling overwhelmed her. Everybody was happy for the couple, but she wasn't. She couldn't deny they were a perfect match. Despite her dislike of the duke, she couldn't agree more. But something felt wrong, misplaced. She couldn't explain what, she didn't understand either.

Of course she didn't feel happy for the duke. He was the man responsible for her despair, the man who had turned her world upside down in the twinkling of an eye. He was the reason she drowned into sorrow and devastation for months, even now she felt nothing but emptiness. From the very first time, he had been cruel to her. He looked at her like she was some dirt on his shoes. He intimidated, insulted and threatened her, using her weaknesses to suppress her. She recalled all the painful experiences and looked at him once again.

It surprised her that she didn't feel a burst of hate shot through her. She should hate him as hell, she got all the reason. But somehow, she didn't hate him. She just couldn't. She didn't know why. Perhaps the story of his tragic past had tugged at her heartstring.

At the moment, as if he might hear her thought, the duke turned his head in her direction and spotted her rightaway. His eyes caught hers and lingered a little longer that he turned his head back slightly for a while as the barouche moved forward, leaving her behind.

She caught her breath. He saw her! No, he looked right into her eyes. She couldn't blink as his gaze locked with hers.

"The duke just looked at us here!" A woman near her exclaimed cheerfully. Was it real? Or was it her imagining that he was looking at her only? Perhaps he was just scanning the crowd.

No. He looked at me straight in the eye and he even turned himself backward as the barouche leaving. He didn't just look around intentionally. He looked at me.

Don't be ridiculous. You think he was deliberately searching for you among the crowd? For what reason? It was totally nonsense.

"Oooh, they are the most beautiful couple ever!" Fortunately the women's rattling distracted her from the inner conflict. The whole parade had slowly disappeared from the sight.

"I can't wait to see the wedding. I heard it would be held a couple of months later in the St. George Cathedral Church in London. His Majesty and the Queen herself shall attend."

Lady Byrne tried to keep her flaunting as subtle as possible, yet she determined to make sure everybody knew she was on the list of the invitees. The A-list precisely.

"I should see my dressmaker immediately, my gown is supposed to be grande, it's for the duke's wedding!"

"The wedding will never be held." A sharp voice startled the crowd. All heads turned to Nora, the Gypsy woman. She strained her eyes and shook her head.

"They are not meant to be. The duke will get married before long, but not to the lady he has just engaged with."

For an unfathomable reason, Ava felt a shiver crept along her nape.

"Oh God!" Lady Byrne placed her hand on her chest. "It's too bad... why? The lady will be perfect for him."

Nora's eyes shining with a gleam Ava saw before when the woman was revealing her past.

"The woman belongs to him is a vibrant spirit, a truly brave one, and Lady Selene is clearly not the fiery, passionate soul in my vision."

She continued as the crowd went silent, spellbound by her words. Ava caught her breath, and cursed herself for doing so. Whoever the duke was going to marry had nothing to do with her. But why she was waiting for the next words in wild anticipation?

"He has the kind of fate of his father. He will be loved powerfully, thoroughly, unconditionally. The woman's love is pure, ever so sincere nothing comes close to it. Beneath the delicate facade, a truly warrior soul. She will sacrifice her life to keep him from harm. She will fight legions of army to protect him. She will shed the last drop of her blood to save him with no regret, not expecting he will love her in return."

Women sighed in unison over her hyperbolic prophecy. Polly rolled her eyes and grimaced in wry amusement. The crowd started muttering noisily.

"But will he ever love her back?"

A woman asked hopefully.

"There's little chance." Nora answered after a moment's contemplating.

"He is a tortured soul, broken to the very core. His heart has long frosted over. It's a miracle if he will ever be able to love again."

***

"Such a beautiful country" Lady Selene Wyndham said as they left the crowd at the townsquare, heading to Vermont Manor. "I think I may very well like it. I could enjoy myself living in here."

"I'm glad you like this place, my lady" Ashton replied politely. "I fear the country will bore you."

"I always love the countryside" She closed her eyes and breathed deeply in effortless grace. "Nothing beats the fresh air, something you rarely find in the city. And the blue sky... and the green grass in the meadow. I remembered in my childhood, nothing made me happier than staying in my father's estate."

Ashton studied his fiancee in a short glance. She was all a man could ask for a wife. Remarkably beautiful, her natural elegance was breathtaking. She never ceased to stir the crowd everytime she walked into a room. And more than just a pretty face, she was a smart woman. She had a strong opinion about everything. Not a typical of overpampered, ignorant lady.

She was perfect for him. She would make a great duchess. A wife could significantly elevate her husband's reputation in society if she played her role very well, and he knew she would.

"I hope you like the room I chose for you. It has the best view to the rose garden."

Selene smiled brilliantly. "It is splendid."

She looked right into his eyes.

"I like everything in your country, Your Grace, especially the people. They are very friendly and polite. The way they welcomed us at the parade, it really touched my heart. I feel their love and respect for you."

"I'm grateful. They may very well love you as their duchess"

Ashton took her hand and kissed it lightly.

"Is there anyone amongst your people who you consider special, or closer to you than anyone else, Your Grace?"

He had no idea where that question might lead, so it took a while before he replied.

"There are some persons I know and get to know me personally. Mostly the most important persons in this town. The priests, the doctors, the principal of local school and some teachers, and some more..."

"I saw you searching for someone in the crowd when we were on the parade..." Selene said in an indifferent tone. "Looked like you found what you sought, from the way you turned backward like you didn't want to lose it. Who might draw your attention so much, Your Grace? The person must be very interesting..."

Ashton froze instantly. Had he been so reckless that she noticed what he did secretly? He had done it in the slightest way possible. He managed to reply in a cool tone as well.

"I thought I saw someone, but I was quite mistaken." The less he spoke about it the better. Fortunately Selene didn't push him further. He was glad they reached the manor shortly afterward. The Wyndham family retired to their room. The lunch reception was still a few hours away. He withdrew to a quiet living room, allowing himself to have some privacy for a while. His mind was consumed by the earlier moment. The fact that Selene was aware of it disturbed him. He recalled the moment at the parade.

He was waving to greet the people when he felt someone was staring at him. Actually everybody was staring at him at that time. He was the main spectacle at the moment, the reason people were coming and waiting. What else should they be doing?

But it was different. It was like being watched over, being looked beneath the surface that he got all his senses alarmed. Instinctively he sought those eyes, and he knew instantly when he found it. It was her. Somehow he found her at once, in the midst of hundred faces.

How could this be possible?

The thought made him feel uneasy. He walked to the bar set and poured himself some liquor to ease the feeling.

She was exceptionally beautiful. No wonder she stood out from the crowd like a diamond among stones. She would even stand out among the ladies in a ball. She was a seductress. Like any other of her sort, she possessed that charm.

He sipped the sparkling liquid slowly, then sat on a couch. He recalled their last meeting months ago. When she confronted him in the studio, for a brief moment, unexpectedly he felt a tinge of guilt and doubt. Had he been so mean and unfair to her? Had he misjudged her so badly?

As he thought about it further, he decided a vixen like her can never be trusted. The women of her family were known for their perilous beauty and their irresistible charm. They had lured the best men in the country. Her mother had kept her father, the Duke of Livingston thus far. She was no different, she had her way to charm Magnus. And today, she had drawn his attention in the most unexpected time. He didn't know why suddenly he caught on a whim to stare at her longer than it supposed to be.

He took another sip. He had a woman of great beauty awaited to be made his own, for the right reason. Soon he would have the right to claim her. Selene had everything he desired in a woman. Her light blonde hair, smooth as silk, so pale it was almost white. Her heart-shaped face, ever so beautiful, one would pause for a while to admire her. And her body, tall and thin and willowy with long legs, absolutely graceful. He had no reason to think about another woman this time, especially when his betrothed was around, here in his house.

Magnus entered the room in languid pace, interrupting his thought. His cousin headed to the bar, entirely ignoring him as if he was just some sort of furniture. Magnus poured some brandy for himself, didn't bother to greet him or congratulate him for the betrothal. He downed the golden liquid in one long swallow.

"Where the hell have you been, sirrah??! I should make a shit out of your absence to the Wyndhams!!!" Lord Carlton burned in rage as he paced toward Magnus in long strides.

"Pardon. Did I miss something today? I don't see anything worth my time."

"You useless chap!! Can't you show a little respect for this family..."

"Enough, Carlton. Today is a joyful day for us and we have guests here. I don't want to see you make a fuss."

Lady Cecily silenced her husband with an elegant wave. She had just walked into the room. The lady approached Magnus, patted and stroked his back gently with motherly love.

"You shouldn't miss the lunch reception, darling. Promise me you're not going anywhere before it's done."

Watching the little family scene, Ashton felt a inevitable sting of jealousy. Long time ago, he once expected Aunt Cecily to be a source of comfort after his mother's death. Later he found that she offered him nothing but a cold politeness, and her attention to him was more dutiful than sincere. There were times in the past when he really envied Magnus. Magnus had everything that he could never have, everything he could not buy with his power or his vast riches.

"I don't know... I'm afraid I cannot promise you, Mother." Magnus replied indifferently.

Lord Carlton grumbled in suppressed anger.

"Bloody hell, you have nothing worth doing thus far... For God's sake, make yourself useful, for at least once in your life. I'm not asking you to go to war and defend your country, I'm just asking you to stay for a reception!"

"I said, enough, Carlton." Lady Cecily sent her husband a murderous glare. Lord Carlton looked away and muttered under his breath.

"Look at how handsome and gallant you are, my little boy..." the lady shifted her gaze to Magnus again and smoothed his long hair.

"I bet the ladies will be surrounding you all the time, begging for your attention. You don't want to disappoint them, do you?"

Magnus stiffened at the terrifying images.

"I think I have better things to do."

"Miss Regina Markham will be here. You both haven't been introduced."

Magnus bit his tongue to hold back a tart reply. He knew his father's plan to match him with the haughty miss. Her father was the Chairman of the House of Lords. Lord Carlton had been very ambitious about expanding their family influences. He had succeeded in setting up some beneficial alliances. Ashton's betrothal to Selene Wyndham was one of them. As now he was planning for more, Magnus should be playing his role.

A hot, scathing anger burst inside him. He glanced with disgust at his mother, who had been coaxing him all along, pretending to be on his side yet all she was doing was to put him into the trap. She was no different than his father. They never bothered with his feelings or his thoughts. He was simply a pawn. Well, Ashton was indeed a pawn, but they treated him better. Far better. They matched Ashton with a goddess and gave their son a girl with a horsey face and protruding teeth.

He set his glass on the table and walked out of the room in long strides.

"Darling! Where are you going? Wait!!!"

Lady Cecily came after him with an elegant swoosh of her heavy skirt.

Lord Carlton stared at them until they were disappeared to the corridor then he turned to Ashton.

"Something has fully occupied him lately. He is nowhere to be seen most of the day. He goes early before the dawn breaks and comes back late at night. Where does he possibly go everyday?"

Ashton made as if he was unaware about the fact. Any comment would only fueled his uncle's fury.

"I have no idea."

"I suspect he is still seeing the peasant girl."

Until now, Lord Carlton and his wife didn't know the true identity of the so called peasant girl.

"I don't think so. I had them watched over, they had stopped seeing each other after I warned the wench."

"And how long since the last time you had them watched over? Has it occurred to you that they planned only temporary split? After you stopped spying them, I suspect they had resumed the affair."

Ashton considered the possibility. He had the pair watched over for six weeks. During the period of time, he was certain they had already separated. But it had been a long while, almost four months ago. Probably they had got together again this time. He thought about another possibility.

"My man once reported that he was engaged in a swordplay practice with a war veteran, but I didn't observe further where the old soldier resided as I considered it harmless and irrelevant to the matter that time."

"Swordplay practice?!" Lord Carlton laughed harshly. "He is never serious about anything. There's nothing he can do persistently other than chasing skirt. I bet he already stopped training with the old man after half a month or less."

He continued in impatient tone.

"Look, I don't care if he wants to screw the wench until he's got enough of it. He can make her his mistress later, after he is securely married. What I worry about is he getting crazy about this little wench and doing stupid things. He may elope with her or impregnate her. If he does, we will suffer from severe consequences."

His uncle was a real autocrat. Since Ashton and Magnus were little boys, Lord Carlton demanded complete obedience and flawless result from them as his apprentices. He was their mentor in almost everything. His domineering manner was something Magnus could not endure, yet Ashton survived. He had no choice. His uncle was the only man he could rely on when he was a child, the only man whom he looked up as a role model for all his life, and he was certainly better than his eccentric father. Uncle Carlton had taken care of the family and the estate during his father's absence, before and after his father's death. He knew he owed his uncle that much and he knew exactly what he wanted to hear from him.

"You need not to worry, uncle. I will take care of it."

"As soon as possible, Ashton. Your aunt and I will bring the Wyndhams on a full day tour tomorrow. I'll make up reasons for your absence. You have full day without disruption. I want this matter to be taken care of without delay."

It had always been like that since he was a child. An immediate action for an urgent matter. So today, just like the old days, he replied with the only answer his uncle would take.

"As you wish."

*****

How are you feeling now, my dear?" Lady Byrne asked her in the afternoon after the parade while Ava was serving her some biscuits and tea.

"I'm fine, milady." She smiled and returned her gaze shortly while pouring the tea. Lady Byrne knew most of the story. She had told her everything except her true identity. When Magnus suddenly disappeared from her life, the lady never stopped questioning her about it and finally, she gave in to her demands. Besides, she had found that the lady was a true friend indeed, not a careless gossiper like she presumed before.

She was just about to leave to the kitchen, pretending to refill the empty teapot when the lady touched her hand.

"You're not fine, my dear. Your lips are smiling but your eyes are not. Your eyes have stopped crying but your heart has not."

Ava couldn't find a word to reply.

"Come and have a seat, darling. I have something I want to share with you." She patted a chair next to her. Ava had no choice but to obey her. She sat beside the lady, feeling a little uncomfortable. She didn't want to be reminded of her heartbreak over and over again, but the heartfelt look in the lady's eyes touched her. She was glad she had found another person who really cared and she didn't want to disappoint her. The lady began her story.

"When I was your age, I had a lover. He was very tall and handsome, he was a son of a rich merchant. My parents were reluctant because he got no title, but they accepted him for my happiness... Then came Lord Byrne, he started to court me, and undoubtedly my parents preferred him more than my man. But they gave me the freedom to choose..."

"All I really wanted was to be with my lover, but he wanted to go to America. He wanted to build a new life there, to start a company of his own. He asked me to go with him, leaving my family, my friends and everything I had here..."

"At that time, I was torn between love and fear. America was a strange land for me, and I was afraid if he eventually couldn't make it as expected. What if he failed to achieve his goal there, I was afraid we would suffer a constant difficulty, alone in an unfamiliar country, far away from our family and friends... I was afraid to leave my comfortable life here where everything had settled perfectly...

"I asked him to give up his dream and stay with me. There was nothing I wanted more... But he refused to stay, he needed to prove something to his parents, to himself... I didn't quite understand that time... Finally he chose to pursue his dream. I was very disappointed that he chose something else over me. The day we separated was the hardest day of my life..."

"You knew the rest of the story. I married Lord Byrne, he was such a good man, and we lived twenty five years of peaceful marriage before he passed away. I had been living in a safe and comfortable life as I wished. But never a day passed that I didn't think of him and missed his smile. I wondered what if I made different choice? What if I followed my heart and not let my fear taking in? What would life be if I were his wife, if I were the mother of his children?Sadly, there was no second chance... Until this day, sometimes I wondered, why didn't I give up my dreams of a safe and secured life and follow him otherwise..."

Lady Byrne covered her hand with hers and looked into her eyes.

"We only live once, dear, and we cannot turn back time... Each of us has only a short ride on this earth. One day when we finally have everything we've dreamed of, and we realized that we paid the price with what we really wanted in life, it would be our biggest regret..."

A strong wave of emotion overwhelmed her and she turned her face from the lady to hide her expression, surprisingly caught Polly looking at her with teary eyes. The lady's story had moved her too.

"Whatever you choose, I'll be by your side. I don't care what people will say about you. I know you better than all the people out there. You're the best a woman can be, and above all else, you deserve happiness..." Polly said to her, her voice was a bit shaken but her gaze firm.

Staring at the blind darkness through the window, Ava lost in thoughts once again. She knew where to find him. Everyday he was training with the captain. She could come and see him there or send him a few words and he would come to her, taking her away with him to the lovely house in Nouvelle. Within its walls, she would be safe from the hostility of his family, from Roger... It could be the perfect solution. If one day her father and Roger ever found her, chances were Roger would refuse to marry her because she had already ruined herself beyond redemption.

*****