Chapter 36

You never forget the moment you experience something for the first time. In a way it plays a part in constructing aspects that become who you are and can oftentimes determine what your life would be. I will never forget the first book I read, the first poem I wrote, the first time I left home alone, the first time I fell in love nor the first time I felt the baby kick. No doubt there are more firsts waiting on some bridge for me to cross, it was only a matter of time before I would come across some that would haunt me.

By the time Lucien left I had already gone off to bed too tired to hear any more of the discussion. I was stuck in a euphoric state after Zee told me he loved me but before I could say it back he scurried off. I think I've admitted this before when I said how much I hate yet love the effect he had on me. I was fortunate that in as much as his love was addictive, it wasn't destructive in nature attacking any vital organs of mine in the process of indulging in it.