NAMJOON'S MY HOME

(NAMJOON'S POV)

We took a look at the wound, it isn't as deep as we thought, but it doesn't stop bleeding. Seokjin keeps insisting he has to drive for my own security, but I don't want to. I need to take them somewhere safe.

Besides, the pain I feel is shifting to anger. I do respect his decision, but it's extremely ridiculous, he didn't even give me a proper answer. All he said is bullshit.

I stop arguing with Seokjin when Yoongi and Jimin come back. They put our belongings in the truck and get inside.

"Are you alright?" Seokjin asks. He turns his body to look at them, I stay looking at the front. The cut hurts more now than when they left.

"Good. They search through our things, though." Yoongi says.

"Our rooms were a mess, but we got everthing. . . I think." Jimin says.

"Is something missing?" I say. I look at them through the rearview mirror.

"No, at least not the things we're familiar with."

"Thanks, guys."

"So, what do we do now?"

"We need to take Joon to the hospital." Seokjin says. I don't like how the nickname sounds in his voice, it hurts. It hurts even more than my wound.

"We need to go back to Seoul, I need to know if our place is safe." I say.

"It should, right?" Jungkook says.

"I don't know."

I suddenly feel dizzy, my vision gets black for a few seconds. I lean on the steering wheel to recover my energy.

"Namjoon, I think I should drive. Look at you, you need a doctor." Seokjin voice says, but it sounds like a murmur.

"Listen to Jin, hyung." The voice that sounds like Taehyung's, says.

I sit straight, looking at Seokjin. His face becomes blurry and all the voices become distant, until I can't hear anything. The beautiful face slowly vanishes into a black sea, leaving me all alone.

(SEOKJIN'S POV)

Yoongi and Hoseok helped me switch seats with Namjoon. The drive to the hospital felt longer than it actually was; I kept glancing at Namjoon every now and then, we tied the sweatshirt around his waist, but it weaken easily. Taehyung and Jungkook asked every minute how much longer it would take us to arrive, even though Yoongi made them shut up a few times. Hoseok broke down and Yoongi tried his best to comfort him, meaningless the youngest stressing him.

A few nurses saw Yoongi and me carrying Namjoon and they attended him right away. We went to the waiting area.

"Guys. . . I'm hungry." Jungkook mumbles.

I grab his hand. "There's a vending machine, you can choose whatever you want." I grab my wallet.

"Aren't you hungry?" He asks.

I'm already used to the hurt on my throat, I've spent more than two hours holding in how much I want to cry.

"I'm not hungry." I squeeze his hand. "You all should go, I think there's a café. Eat well, so we can go as soon as possible."

"I'm staying here with you." Yoongi says.

"There's no need. I'm going to let you know if the doctors say something."

"Sure?"

I nod.

They leave, looking behind from time to time. I move my hand forward every time, biting my lower lip. Jungkook and Taehyung look one last time before they turn into a corridor.

I'm alone with my thoughts.

Alone.

I look at my restless feet. I move them from one side to the other. I did the same the day my mother died, it helped me to stay calm.

But it was worthless.

She's not here anymore.

If something happens to Namjoon, I don't know what I'm going to do with me, with the boys, with my father, with my people and with Red Men. My blood boil just with the thought of those people. The ones who hurt Namjoon. A woman and a man attacked him in the parking lot of the hotel, when Jungkook and I arrived they ran away.

Their clothes were red, so it makes sense they're part of it - but I wouldn't have taken the word 'red' too seriously.

"Kim Namjoon's relatives?" A middle aged man says. I stand up, almost falling down. I run towards him.

"Me."

"Are you his brother?"

I shake my head. "But we're close. So close. I'm here with our group of friends, our families aren't with us. How is he?" I don't waste my time explaining something he'll forget once he walks into those glass doors.

"He lost a lot of blood." He sighs. "But the wound didn't get infected, he's lucky it didn't affect the significant tissue. If it was the case, then some of his organs could have also been damaged."

"It means he's okay?"

"He's already in a room. He needs to stay here at least twenty eight hours, we need to make sure it heals without any problem."

"Two days?!"

"If everything's fine, indeed." He smiles politely and walks away. The same doors get closed automatically behind him.

I sit down in the nearest chair and take off my phone, sending a message to Yoongi.

At least he's fine.

I walk to the main desk. Two nurses are typing non-stop, their faces focused only on the screen in front of them.

I clear my throat. "Excuse me."

One of them looks at me, but her fingers are still working. "Can I know where Kim Namjoon is staying? The doctor didn't tell me anything."

"Room 409, on the third floor."

"Can I see him?"

"He's still sleeping."

"Can I see him?"

The nurse frowns. "Yes. . ."

"Thank you." I bow.

I send another message to Yoongi before running to Namjoon.

My Joonie.

The lights are off, there's enough of it thanks to the windows. He isn't sharing room with anyone at the moment - which I internally celebrate. His breathing is normal, but he has two little tubes in his nose and two serums: blood and water. A machine is monitoring his heartbeat.

The hospital clothes doesn't let me see the wound, but the bandages make a distinct bulge under it.

I grab a chair and sit next to him, as close as possible. I warm his hand with mine and I lean it on my cheek, not letting go. His hand's still cold, but it's starting to recover its own warmth. He's pale and his lips are almost as the same colour as his skin.

Why him?

Why did it happen to him?

He's an angel. My angel. He's the most precious thing in this world.

I wish it had been me.

I wish it was me the one laying on this bed.

Not him.

Me.

I allow myself to cry, his hand gets wet with tears, but I don't care. A wave of relieve fills my body, he's going to be okay. He's going to wake up soon and the boys are going to welcome him with lots of love.

I've no idea if this is going to happen in an hour or a day, but he's going to wake up.

He got injured, but he won't die.

My Namjoon-ah won't die.

I stroke his hair and place a soft kiss on his forehead, which is still sweaty.

"You're going to be okay." I kiss the hand I'm still holding. "You can't hear me, can you?" I smile to myself. "I love you. I'm in love with you, Joon-ah. There's no one like you. You're my one and only, angel."

I let myself say these words aloud, the ones I know I can't say anymore because of his own safety. I hate, but I love that he didn't give up, he didn't believe me. He keeps trusting me, even if I deny it one hundred times.

"I'm going to keep you in my heart, don't you think I'm going to forget you." I hesitate before pecking his lips - longer than I should.

His cheeks start recovering its own colour, he doesn't look as sick as he did before. He can't hear me, right?

Someone opens abruptly the door and I lean on Namjoon - without touching him - protectively. I relax when I see it's only the boys.

"How is he?" Yoongi sits next to me, on another chair.

"He looks. . . fine." I say.

The others grab different stools to sit around the bed. Now I really hope we're the only ones here until Namjoon gets better, we're using all the seats in this room, less the sofas.

"What are we going to do? We can't go back." Jimin says, looking at Namjoon.

"We won't. We can stay here until he gets discharged, we're going to plan what to do later. We still have the van, the money and a few clothes. We're going to use this bathroom and feed ourselves with the food they've in the café and the vending machines."

Namjoon's going to be so proud of Yoongi when he wakes up. He can be a mess and horrible at his studies, but he knows how to keep everything calmed and controlled. He was born already intelligent as Namjoon, they don't need to think a lot to have useful ideas.

"I want to go home." Taehyung says, resting his head on Jimin's shoulder.

"Before you know it, we're going to be on our way to Seoul." I do my best to cheer him up.

"I said home, not flat." He pouts.

Nobody says anything. We don't have anything to say.

I put Namjoon's hand on my thigh, holding it with mine. I miss my father and my kingdom, but I'm already home.

Namjoon's my home.