MY SUNSHINE

(HOSEOK'S POV)

Bada's a part of my past, I don't want anyone to know about. When I arrived at Third Heaven, I had a lot of nightmares about him. It took me a lot of time to understand that he could never touch me again, but that doesn't erase the damage.

And Yoongi knows.

Yoongi out of all people.

Back then, focusing on him helped me forget about my own problems. I thought I had the situation under control, but I don't.

I try to pull away from Yoongi's embrace, but he presses me back against his chest. I don't know what I should do. I don't want to see his face.

I'm ashamed.

I'm so ashamed of myself. I feel nasty. I'm nasty.

He didn't have to know it.

No one had to know it.

A shiver run down to my spine remembering Bada's touches on my skin, his lips on my skin.

"It's okay. I'm with you." Yoongi says, his hand still stroking my hair.

I shake my head. "Let me alone, please."

"No."

I finally pull away, looking at my thighs. "I really need to be alone."

"What you really need is help." He says, softly. "What was all that about? What happened, Hoseok? Which part you didn't tell me?"

His voice breaks at the end. I look at him for a few seconds, a few tears are rolling down his cheeks, but he wipes it away with his sleeve. I lower my head back again, I can't do this.

"I'm sorry." I say.

"You don't need to apologise, Hoba. You didn't do anything wrong." He lifts my chin up with his fingers. "You don't need to tell me right away, but I'm worried. Are you okay?"

"I'll."

"Do I have to beat him up? Say yes, and I'm going to find him and make him regret everything he did to you."

A small smile appears on my face.

"Thanks for looking after me, Yoongs."

"I always did and I always will. So, do I have to kill someone?"

I shake my head. I've to solve this problem on my own. This is between Bada and me.

"Don't tell anyone, please."

"I won't. I don't know what happened, but. . . Yeah."

Yoongi's not dumb, I know he already has his own conclusion in mind and he's probably not wrong.

"Is the offer still up?" I ask and he tilts his head. "Can I sleep with you tonight?"

Yoongi stands up and offers me his hand. I grab it clumsily, lying quickly on the bed and closing my eyes.

I feel Yoongi next to me. "Do you want me to hug you or. . .?"

I look at him. "I'm okay. I would prefer sleeping without anyone touching me tonight. Your presence is more than enough."

"If you need anything, wake me up." He turns off the light.

A weak blueish light pass through the window. Yoongi shifts a few times and I snuggle near him, but avoiding touching his chest.

I don't know how many minutes or hours have past, but I'm still fully awake. My only distraction's Yoongi's breath, what also tells me he's awake as well. I think we won't sleep tonight.

(YOONGI'S POV)

A heavy feeling wakes me up, it doesn't let me breath. I look around, trying to get up and run to the bathroom, until I see him. Hoseok's head on my chest, he's hugging me like a koala. Fucking god, I thought I was having a heart attack.

I look at the hour on my phone.

5:30 am.

I don't know how many hours I've slept, but I don't think it's more than 3.

I rest my head comfortably on the pillow, drawing symbols on his back with my fingers. I can't tell for sure who fall asleep earlier, but I'm glad he has fallen asleep, after all.

I don't know exactly what he went through and I don't want to know the details. I don't know how I'm going to be able to not punch Bada in the face, if Hoseok tells me he hurt him in any way. I don't want to picture Hoseok in a situation like that.

He was a kid.

I hug Hoseok tighter, it can't be real. Bada could have never done such thing — Hoseok could have never gone through that. He's a beautiful and innocent creature, he hasn't done anything wrong.

"Why are you crying?"

Hoseok's eyes are half open, his arms and legs are still around me. He blinks a few times as I stay still.

I clear my throat. "Sorry, did I wake you up?"

He shakes his head. "You didn't answer my question."

To be fair, I didn't even realise I was crying. "It's nothing. We should go back to sleep, we still have a few hours." I sniff.

"Oh, sorry." He says, moving away. "I move a lot when I'm asleep."

"It's okay, I don't mind."

"Oh. . ."

He rests his head on the pillow, but he doesn't push me away when I hug him.

I don't want to let him go.