Chapter 125: Max

Max needed to be content with where they were. He told himself that while in the back of his mind he could already feel the wind up happening. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"What's that for?" she asked softly.

"Hm?"

"Every so often you do that. One deep breath. You'll close your eyes. Why?"

"Pumping the brakes on my brain."

"Oh? How's that working?"

"For the most part, pretty good."

"But not now?"

"Can you blame me?" He slid his hand up and down her back. She was wearing a camisole, the kind that left her upper back bare to the touch. "Every other thought is me telling myself to not obsess, to not pick apart what I'm doing, what could be done better."

"You seem like a very different person on the outside."

"Sometimes I have to pretend to be that person."

"What makes you happiest?"

You.

Max didn't say that.

He knew she wasn't ready to hear something like that.

"I'd rather pretend than go back to the way I was. Fake it until you make it, am I right?"