Levi’s Decision

I was very moved writing this chapter, so I would like to suggest you read it while listening to the song "Constellations" by Amadea Music Productions (I know I've suggested it before, but it's one of the most moving songs I've ever heard and it matched a lot with the chapter while I was reading it) It's on YouTube and Spotify. Good reading! ♥

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All Hange could hear was Eren and Mikasa's soft cries.

They were sitting on the ground behind some houses, in a safe place for Erwin's Titan not to devour them when he would transform.

Eren and Mikasa were comforted by Connie and Jean. Sasha was still passed out, lying in a corner. Floch was more isolated, his head between his knees, in complete silence.

Hange and Lara were also a little further away from the others, alone, leaning against each other. Hange was feeling her daughter's head resting on her chest and every now and then, she heard a little sob here and there coming from the girl. Gently, Hange pressed her lips on top of Lara's head, feeling a few tears burn her face.

They both had their hands intertwined and Lara was caressing her mother.

Suddenly, a sound of thunder was heard and an intense orange and yellow lightning flash was made, in the place where Levi, Erwin, Armin, and Bertholdt had been.

They all paralyzed.

Quickly, Hange and Lara stood up, trying to look in the direction of the lightning. Gradually, the others also stood up, curious.

They climbed onto a rooftop and saw him from afar.

A very scrawny Titan was lying on the ground in the direction they were looking at. They narrowed their eyes to try to see better and, as if they were connected, at this moment, they all held their breath.

That Titan was blond, just like Erwin and Armin.

Had blue eyes like Erwin and Armin.

But, those eyes didn't lie.

They were Armin's eyes.

Hange and Lara looked at each other, extremely confused and perplexed, and before they could even see or hear the others' reactions, they flew off to meet Levi.

They both landed on the edge of the rooftop where he was and saw him. Bertholdt was no longer there, because Levi had placed him on a farther away rooftop, so that the transformed Titan wouldn't try to also devour him.

There was Levi, standing. A little behind him, Erwin was still lying on the tiles.

Lara and Hange looked at Levi.

They looked at their beloved one.

Levi finally noticed the presence of his girls. He was in a deplorable state. His face was filthy, full of blood, dirt, and tear marks. He looked at them with an air of extreme weariness.

Then, as if he had no strength left in his body, he dropped to his knees, arms and head hanging forward.

"LEVI!"

"DADDY!"

Hange and Lara ran to meet him, also dropping to their knees and they hugged him.

They hugged him like never before.

The three of them touched their foreheads, finally feeling each other's body heat they much wanted. Lara and Hange were deeply crying, and little by little, as feeling he was protected in the embrace of his girls, Levi also allowed himself to cry.

They cried and cried, their shoulders shaking.

There was a lot to be said, but all they could do at the moment was cry.

But just by being in each other's company, words were no longer necessary.

Levi wrapped his arms around Hange and Lara, pulling them closer to him. All he wanted right now was to stop time and cuddle with the women of his life for hours and hours.

At one point, between her sobs, Lara said, her voice breaking:

"They're all gone..."

Her parents looked at each other through their tears and felt as if they had been stabbed in the chest.

Of all the veteran Survey Corps soldiers, Hange, Levi, and Lara were the last ones left. All the others who had survived this Battle of Shiganshina, such as Eren, Mikasa, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Floch, and now, Armin, were relatively new recruits. Very few soldiers had stayed at the Headquarters, but they had all joined the Survey Corps a long time after Lara had.

Hange was the oldest in her career, followed by Levi and then, lastly, Lara.

They were the only ones left. None of their old friends were there anymore. This reality fell on them like a giant rock.

However, somehow, of all people, them, the only family of the Survey Corps, had survived everything until this moment.

It even looked like a miracle. In their hearts, they expressed a sense of gratitude for each other's lives.

Slowly, Levi lifted his head and held Hange and Lara's faces, looking at them deeply, keeping every detail. At the same time, the girls also placed their hands on Levi's face.

Lara felt a great pain in her heart to see her dear father in this state. At that moment, he even seemed older, with wrinkles here and there. Hange looked at him with a gleam in her eye, just like when she first saw him, when Levi joined the Survey Corps.

Then, as if they were connected, the girls took a clean piece of their green cloaks and began to gently rub it on Levi's face, cleaning him. He allowed himself to close his eyes and feel their affection.

Much cleaner now, Levi also took his cloak and started rubbing it on his daughter's face. Just as with Hange, Levi also had the impression that Lara had grown up since they last saw each other.

But at that moment, she was back to that little girl they had found in the Forest, of just ten years old. So tiny and small. Her blue eyes gleamed at him, with that expression of admiration she always made when she looked at her Hero.

Levi held Lara's face and began to clean it.

"You really need a bath," he said, making Lara giggle.

When he finished, Levi placed a long kiss on her forehead.

Then, he turned to Hange. Levi held her face and also began to clean it. For each part of her face that he cleaned, Levi would place a soft, loving kiss. Hange closed her eyes. When Levi got to her injured eye, he ran his finger gently, wiping away some of the dirt that was already smearing the bandage.

Lara watched them with such affection, that for a moment, she thought about how she would like to have her sketchbook there, to record that scene.

Levi wiped and kissed Hange's face, kindly.

At last, he wiped her mouth. Slowly, Levi approached and their lips touched in a deep and soft kiss. Then, they opened their mouths, finally being able to taste each other.

Lara noticed that her mother was shedding a few tears while kissing her father, and he himself couldn't hold them back either. Lara felt her heart beat stronger and, if it weren't for the terrible condition they were in, she would dare say that it was one of the most beautiful moments she has ever witnessed in her life.

Hange and Levi held their faces, affectionately. You could see the intensity of passion and longing for each other, and how that kiss seemed to say so many unspoken words. There was a certain expression of pain on their faces, as if they were still feeling the fear they felt until just now, of never being able to see each other again.

When they were done, they touched their foreheads, smelling their breaths and still feeling the taste of each other in their mouths. Their hearts were beating wildly.

They both then turned to Lara and, as if realizing what they had done, they blushed.

"Sorry, sweetie..." said Hange, glancing awkwardly at Levi, who was trying not to look at Lara, very red.

"Why are you apologizing?" asked Lara, chuckling. "Do you think I've never seen a couple kissing? That was beautiful! You may continue if you want!"

In the end, they gave her a sad smile and Levi ruffled his daughter's hair, while Hange rubbed her back.

Then, they heard a sound. Something that sent a big chill down their spines.

It was Bertholdt's cries of despair. He had woken up.

They looked in the direction of those screams and saw that Armin's Titan, at that moment, was bringing Bertholdt into his mouth. From a distance, on top of a roof, they could spot Eren and Mikasa hugging each other, witnessing that scene, next to Connie with Sasha on his back, Jean, and Floch.

Instinctively, Lara ducked between her parents, her eyes widening. It was a horrible sight. Even Hange and Levi got closer and the three of them stood there, holding each other, huddled together.

Bertholdt was a mortal enemy for them, but seeing that, they could not help but feel a huge pain in their hearts as they witnessed his despair in the face of a slow and painful death. He was screaming for help and before Armin crushed his head in a bite, Bertholdt called for Annie and Reiner's names.

And then, complete silence was followed by that.

The three of them lowered their heads, feeling their hearts very, very heavy. Then, they turned to Erwin. Hange and Lara looked at Levi, with worried expressions on their faces, but he just shook his head negatively, his eyes covered by the shadow of his hair.

"Is he...?" began Hange, whispering.

"Yes..." answered Levi, in a low tone, "He's already gone..."

Lara looked from one to the other, feeling tears running down her face. For a few seconds, her entire body tingled as she processed what those words meant.

They moved to stay around Erwin's body. Lara gently began to caress her uncle's face. Then, to Levi's surprise, he saw his daughter rip the Survey Corps symbol off Erwin's jacket and hand it over to him.

"Here, dad..." said Lara, giving him a sad smile, "For you to keep it as a memory..."

Hange lowered her head, shedding a few tears, and, still stunned by Lara's sudden gesture, Levi took the symbol and pressed it against his chest, feeling a huge lump in his throat.

They remained in silence for a while and then, Hange turned to Levi:

"Why did you choose Armin?"

He looked at Hange and then turned to Erwin, lying there in front of him.

"I was going to give the serum to Erwin... I really was... But, when I was about to put the needle in his arm, he slapped my hand... It felt like he was raising his hand, like when children do to ask a question in the classroom. Then, he said, 'Teacher, how do we know there's not more humans outside the Walls?'"

Lara and Hange narrowed their eyes at Levi.

"When I saw him there, his hand raised and speaking those words," he continue, crestfallen, "I realized something that until then, I had not... It was as if a light shine in my mind..." Levi then looked up at the skies. "Since I met Erwin and decided to follow him, I put him on a pedestal. For me, besides being like a brother, he was a figure of total admiration. His speech, charisma, and way of leadership gave me the impulse I needed to fight for humanity and to be someone useful in this life..."

Hange lowered her eyes. Indeed, Erwin had that effect on people. Even she admitted admiring him almost blindly.

"But..." continued Levi, looking at Hange, "Before leaving for this mission, Erwin made it very clear to me that his goal was and always had been to follow the dream of finding out the truth that his father had once told him and died for..." He lowered his head, "When I heard that, I confess that I felt a little betrayed, 'cause it seemed that in the end, all Erwin wanted was just to follow his childhood dream, putting the lives of many at risk just to satisfy himself..."

Lara looked at her father, pressing her lips together, listening intently.

"When we faced the Beast Titan and weren't successful, I was consumed with guilt for having sent Erwin and so many other soldiers to their deaths... I was responsible for pushing him to give up on his dream, making him become a live bait for the Beast Titan, and finally making him assume his true responsibility as Commander of the Survey Corps. But, I stopped to think... The initial idea wasn't mine, it was Erwin's... He was the one who suggested that whole plan, he just couldn't let go of his dream to execute it and finally fulfill his role."

Levi ran his hand over his face.

"But even though I was the one who pushed him to go through with the plan, Erwin did it of his own free will. He could've refused to do it, but he did not... Erwin fulfilled his role. Talking to him, it was clear how divided he felt in following his and his father's dream, while carrying all that weight on his back, from so many deaths he had caused, for keeping following that dream..."

Levi then looked at Lara, sadly.

"Erwin needed my push to truly sacrifice himself for humanity. Armin, on the other hand, sacrificed himself freely, on his own, without taking anyone with him, and especially, even sparing the life of one of my most precious treasures, you, baby..."

Hange took Levi's hand, gently squeezing it.

"In the end..." he continued, looking at the girls, "Erwin died, doing what he had sworn to do when he joined the Survey Corps: fighting and sacrificing himself for humanity."

They all looked at Erwin.

"I didn't want him to come back to all this suffering of keep carrying this weight of guilt he felt, so... I decided that finally, it was time for him to rest..."

There was silence for a few moments and then, Lara approached Hange. The girls looked at Levi and squeezed his hands, blinking slowly at him.

"Levi..." said Hange, giving him a sad smile, "You did well..."

"You're right, dad... He needs to rest now."

Hearing those words, Levi felt a great peace come into his heart, despite the sadness of having lost his best friend for good.

Then, they heard a certain buzz coming from the direction in which Armin's Titan had eaten Bertholdt. They turned around and realized that at that moment, Armin was coming out of his Titan's nape.

Lara stood up, walking to the edge of that rooftop. Her parents stayed where they were, and as they watched their daughter, they intertwined their hands and Hange rested her head on Levi's chest, closing her eyes.

Watching her friends desperately go to meet a fully reborn-from-the-ashes Armin, Lara looked at her Officer. A breeze passed over her, causing her green cloak and hair to flutter behind her.

Lara did not see it, but at the moment he came out of his Titan and found his friends surrounding him, crying with emotion, Armin opened his eyes for just a few seconds, and the only thing he was able to see through his Titan's steam, was the distant figure of a girl, her cloak and hair fluttering with the wind. As he tried to focus his vision, Armin immediately recognized the blue eyes of Lara, his Leader.

When he saw her up there on that rooftop, also looking at him, Armin heaved a sigh of relief and finally allowed himself to close his eyes and pass out.

As she watched Armin, Lara's heart began to race, in a mix of happiness and relief. However, there was another feeling there, which she still couldn't identify, but which made her feel her heart beat stronger and stronger. Lara grabbed her own shirt, as if she wanted to hold her heart. Then, she felt a tear come out of her eyes.

Seeing that her Officer was well in the hands of her friends, Lara wiped that tear away and returned to her parents.

"How's he doing?" asked Hange, still lying on Levi's chest.

Lara gave a quick look back and a slight smile.

"He'll be fine..."

Levi, Hange, and Lara helped each other to carry Erwin's body to the ground. They talked for a while about whether to bury him right there or not, and Lara suggested putting him on a bed, so it would seem he was just sleeping. Looking at each other, Levi and Hange nodded, with a sad smile.

They entered one of the abandoned houses and laid him down in a small room that had only one bed. Hange picked some flowers she found near the door of that house and placed them in a half-broken vase on the nightstand.

They knelt down next to the bed, so they could look at Erwin for just a few more minutes, for they had to go on. The others were waiting. They held Erwin's single arm and gently squeezed it.

They remained in silence for a while, tears slowly streaming down their faces, then Hange and Levi got surprised to see that Lara began to giggle, softly.

"What is it, dear?" asked Hange, stroking her daughter's back.

"It's just..." Lara sniffed, "I remembered something uncle Erwin told me a few days ago, while we were playing a tough chess game..."

Levi and Hange nodded for her to continue.

"I don't exactly remember what subject we were talking about, but it was something about life, you know? We were kind of philosophizing around... Then," Lara had a mixture of laughter and crying, "He told me the following: 'We're very small compared to the great meaning of life. But remember one thing, Lara. We may be small, but your dad is definitely waaay smaller!'"

Silence. Both Hange and Levi were wide-eyed. Lara looked from one to the other, as if she was having a hard time holding back a laugh, but with tears still welling up in her eyes.

Then, startling the others, Hange burst out laughing, shaking her shoulders, while wiping away her tears. Lara joined her and they both looked at Levi, who still had a perplexed expression. Slowly, he also began to laugh, covering his face, and shaking his head in total indignation.

"He definitely is Uncle Erwin!" said Hange, giving a sad smile.

"I believe..." said Levi, after a long sigh, "He wanted us to remember him this way... A fun, charismatic guy, always ready to give us a supportive word."

Hange and Lara agreed, looking fondly at Erwin, who, now that they watched better, did seem like he was just sleeping, soundly and peacefully.

Then, Lara held tight to her parents' hands, blinking slowly at them. She got up and covered Erwin with his green cloak, with the Survey Corps symbol facing upwards.

They stood up and began to head towards the door. Hange and Lara took one last look at Erwin, a few tears streaming down their faces, and left.

Levi placed his hand on the door handle and before closing it behind him, with a tear running down his cheek, he whispered:

"Farewell, my brother... Thank you for everything..."