(3) Connection

Let's see.

There are about 73 million people in the population that covers all the western states my specific server online does. Out of all those people there's only 20,000 users on the chat. That's literally only .027% of the population. And somehow, someway I happen to not only live in the same town as one of my online friends, but go to the very same school as him. Talk about being the most unfortunate person in the world.

"Hey Jayden, this is English class. What's with all the math?" Connor leaned in towards me, staring down at my random scribbles of math equations.

"Um...I'm just figuring out tuition costs. Gotta figure out how to afford school," I laughed.

"You're smart enough to get full ride scholarships man. Sometimes I just don't get you." Connor pulled away and got back to texting people under his desk.

My relationship with Connor was definitely different from what everyone at school expected. We were seen as the icon of what best friends should be. Everyone assumed we were super close but the honest truth was he never told me any secrets and I never told him mine. Him and I both knew we really didn't care about each other. We both used each other for personal gain and for popularity. And we were fine with it. There was nothing to lose anyways. I guess it did make us miss out on hanging out with someone we actually liked, but a small price to pay.

Class went by as slow as usual, and before I knew it, the final bell of the day rang and the usual sounds of everyone hurrying out surrounded me.

"Are you still coming to the party tonight Jay?" Chloe latched herself onto my arm, looking up at me with a big grin.

"Yeah of course," I said. "I'm looking forward to it."

"Good. It wouldn't be the same without you." She let go of me and walked away, waving back at me as she disappeared into the crowd.

As soon as she was out of view I took out my phone and quickly messaged Cherry.

Me: Hey, I'm gonna have to cancel tonight. I forgot about plans I already made with my gf

Cherry: Bro....this is the third day in a row you've canceled

Me: Haha. Sorry╮(╯▽╰)╭

"Hey, who you texting?" An unfamiliar voice came from behind me and grabbed my shoulder. I quickly stuffed my phone back in the pocket and saw it was one of Chloe's friends, Tatum.

"Just one of my friends," I said in confusion. "Is there something you need?"

"Eh, not really," she said. "Wanna walk with me to the parking lot?"

"One second let me get my things really quick."

What the hell does she even want? Ever since I started dating Chloe, it was as if her entire friend group was trying to interrogate me. None of them ever said anything to my face but I could just tell by looking at them that they all were trying to figure out what kind of person Chloe would be willing to actually date. Afterall, Chloe was famous for rejecting basically the whole male population in the school.

"I'm assuming Chloe already invited you to the party tonight," Tatum said as we began walking towards the parking lot.

"Ah yeah. I've been meaning to ask, what's the party for exactly?"

"What do you mean? Have you never been invited? We literally have a party every other Friday just for the hell of it. I thought out of all people, you would've been invited."

"I guess everyone else assumed someone else invited me so no one ever bothered to ask," I laughed.

In all honesty, I was quite hurt that this was the first party I've ever heard of. I tried to excuse people for not inviting me but this isn't even the first time I've been excluded. I've had quite a name all of high school, but I was still unable to connect to anyone. No matter how fake everyone in the "in" crowd was, they were able to connect to each other in some way. But no one could read me. No one was able to form a close relationship with me. So I've been excluded even while being the most popular guy in the school. I tried to connect. I tried to fix what was missing, but I just couldn't. It made no sense. I'm not the only one faking my way through, so why am I the only one struggling with truly understanding others?

"Well I'll see ya later tonight," I said as I unlocked my car.

"Hey," she suddenly said with a sharp voice. "Can you tell me what Chloe sees in you? You're not interesting at all."

"Um," I nervously laughed while clearing my throat. "That's something you should ask her."

I quickly shut the door of my car before she could get another word in.

What the hell?! That was totally uncalled for. Literally why is everyone at this school always so rude? Can't she just mind her own business or keep her rude thoughts to herself? Talk about immature.

I can't easily answer her question either. I have no idea why Chloe likes me. I've asked her several times and she always just laughs at the question.

"Man, that really hurt," I said out loud, quickly wiping away tears that started forming. As soon as my vision was cleared up again I drove off.

•••

"Dude! Good to finally see you here! You're so late!" Connor gave me a big smile as I walked into the kitchen of where the party was being held.

"Rush hour traffic took a bit longer than I anticipated," I sighed. "Who else is here?"

"The usual. Chloe, Tatum, Seth and Emma are over there," he said pointing over towards the couches.  "And our little group all showed up too but they're all outside near the pool."

"How long have you guys been having these parties?"

"I think they started sometime sophomore year," he said while pouring some Fireball into a shot glass. "Want some?"

I took the glass from his hand and quickly drank it down.

That burns! Holy shit!

"Haha dude your face! How you never drank alcohol before?!"

"I've had a beer or two but that tasted like straight up cinnamon bears and hand sanitizer combined!"

"Man, you're hilarious! Never fail to show off just how pure you are," he patted me on the back. "Okay okay you don't have to have anymore of this but there's smoother options over there on the counter if you wanna drink anymore."

"I'll think about it."

I paused for a moment, trying to think if I wanted to ask why I was never invited. I didn't want to come off as rude or too hurt by it, but I didn't know how to just casually ask.

"Why was I never invited to these parties before?" I said out loud.

Oh no. That was way too blunt.

"What? Does that bug you? Don't sweat so much, it was just an honest mistake," Connor rolled his eyes and laughed.

That's an obvious lie.

"Don't lie to me," I snapped before I had time to try to compose my emotions.

"Geesh, stop getting so upset Jayden. You're too goodie-two-shoes for these sorts of things. We weren't even gonna invite you again but Chloe kept pestering us about it." All of Connors sarcasm and smiles disappeared and for a moment I thought he gave me a look of disgust. I hope I was imagining that.

"I see," I said with a deadpanned expression. "Sorry I asked."

"Ugh, you're making this drink taste bad in my mouth. I'll talk to you later. I'm going out to the pool." Connor set down his bottle and shot glass and quickly walked away from me.

"Why are you here?" I heard someone say from Chloe's group of friends.

Oh great, now even they are questioning me.

"I'm the one who got you all the drinks and you're wondering why I'm here?" Someone else's voice spoke up.

I looked over their direction and saw August standing there with his arms folded and staring intensely down at Chloe.

"No one asked you to stay," she said. "We gave you the money for the drinks so stop lingering around. You're stinking up my house."

"It smells like shit in here because your friends here can't ever hold down their drinks," he laughed. "I'll leave but let me at least grab a couple shots before I do."

"Whatever, do as you wish," Chloe sighed and went back to talking amongst her group. August started heading my direction to get a drink for himself.

Oh shit! He can't strike up a conversation with me or he's totally gonna recognize my voice as Yagami's. I gotta walk away. I got to just completely ignore him.

"Why you just walking around by yourself?" August said to me with a mocking tone.

"I was just about to head outside," I muttered.

I'm not sure why the next words came out of my mouth. Maybe I was just having a bad day and not thinking straight. Maybe it was because I was so used to hearing August's voice and he was secretly my best friend. Whatever it was, the words just came out before I could stop them.

"Thank you for buying drinks for us," I smiled at him and quickly walked away before he had any chance to say anything back.

You're an idiot Jayden!