To have and to hold

Jackson drops to his knee and takes a blue velvet little box from his pocket.

"Oh my God..."

"Candice... I was planning a beautiful speech but now looking at you, I can't even put in words how much I want you to be mine"

I'm shaking, I can't believe Jax is proposing. He's looking at me anxiously waiting for an answer.

I want to say yes, of course, I want to say yes but this is still too crazy. I agreed to move with him, I was not expecting he would jump to the next level so fast.

Now I know why he sounded so weird when Papa told us he and Bonnie are getting married.

"Jax..."

His face falls when he see me hesitant.

"You are still married to my sister."

"Not anymore."

"What? It's done?"

"Yes, also you know that was never a real relationship, it was a mistake, but with you... there's no mistake, no doubts."

"I... I don't know what to say."

"Just say yes, we can start from this."

He smiles but I can see he's still tense. I don't want to make him wait anymore.

"Yes. Now what?"

"I don't know, I didn't plan this further."

We both laugh, I can't believe how much my life changed after meeting Jackson. I throw myself at him, I want to hold him tight and never let him go. He put me away just a little.

"I think you should wear this now."

Jax put the ring on my finger, It's beautiful but simple.

"Thank you, it's amazing. It's perfect."

I can't even wait for the finish to slide the ring to hold him again. This time a kiss him deeply, I can't keep all this happiness inside me.

"The baby is sleeping?"

I ask him through kisses.

"Yes.... why?"

"I want to show you how much I liked my ring."

"nmm... show me."

I push him to the bed, he lays down resting on his elbows. First I help Jax get out of his shirt, then I run my hands on his bare chest.

"Shouldn't I help you get away of your clothes now?"

"No, no... you stay there, just watch."

I push him back to the bed, I start to undress, first, the blouse then the skirt, sandals. Jax follows every movement with his eyes.

"Come here."

I sit on his lap, straddling him. Jax runs his hands on my back up and down, warming up my skin.

He flips my bra open, exposing my hard nipples.

"Hmmm.. looks even better each day. How is that possible?"

I look down at my chest, maybe I got a few pounds, the last thing I care about right now is the size of my breasts. I'm glad he's satisfied anyway.

He grabs one of my breasts with his hand putting his lips around the other.

"oh!"

It feels more sensitive, it's good I just accept the feeling.

"Mmm..."

"I like this way to say 'thank you. You can thank me like this all the time."

He makes me smile, I like the way things are between us now. It's sexy and easy, almost like there's not all that drama around us.

"Thank you... thank you... thank you."

I speak placing kisses all over his face and neck.

I push him back on the bed, I slip down my panties. Jax smiles appreciating.

"Don't make me wait..."

He smiles with dark eyes full of desire.

"Thirsty much?"

I can't deny I want him bad too. I can't wait to feel Jax inside me.

A few moments later we collapse in bed together.

"You're more than welcome..."

He says to me smiling trying to take some breath.

My body is heavy, I feel sleepy. I lay my head on his chest, I barely can keep my eyes open.

"This was a great start for the weekend."

"Sure it was a great start for our life together."

This was the sweetest thing he ever told me, I feel my eyes watering, I snuggle closer to him falling asleep.

In the afternoon I wake up alone in bed. But Jax is not too far, I can see him outside on the balcony.

I admire the view for a while, he's indeed handsome... And it's all mine.

He looks a bit worried, I should ask what happened. Maybe he's just tired.

But first I need to go to the bathroom.

I feel a bit dizzy. I think Jax is not the only one tired from the trip.

When I get back he's still on the balcony.

"Hey..."

I hug him from behind, placing kisses on his back.

"Hey you... Are you feeling ok?"

"Yes, I think it was just the trip. Actually... I came here to ask you the same."

Jax put his arm around me and kiss my forehead.

"Yes. I got a phone call from Detective West."

(I was not expecting to hear his name. We didn't speak since the day we tried to get more information from Pierre.)

"Oh! What happened?"

"He wants to meet me. They finally arrested Pierre, he skipped away to France. They're waiting for his extradition for next weeks."

"This is great, Jax!"

"It is."

"Then why you don't look like this?"

"Unfortunately it will be on the same day of your grandfather wedding."

"Oh, I see..."

I consider his news for a while, Bonnie told me they would invite Amanda, they want a small ceremony for family only.

I don't think she's attending but I never know.

"It's ok. They will understand, this is something important. You're waiting a long time for justice."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

"I'm sorry, I really wanted to come. I'm also happy this thing will finally end."

"Me too."

I check my ring again, I'm so happy. Everything seems to be finally falling in their places.

"I'm hungry."

"Again? You ate all the way during the ride."

"Hey! It's not nice to appoint a woman's diet plan."

"Ok ok... sorry. Let's find something for you."

I get inside the bedroom to get ready for dinner. I feel a bit dizzy again. I'm not used to feeling sick this often... sick and hungry...

(Ok... calm down, maybe it's nothing wrong. I should buy a pregnancy test on Monday when we get back home just to make sure, but I know is nothing.)

We're sitting together at the restaurant near the beach. We look like a real family.

"So... where are we announcing the news?"

Jackson ask me while sipping his drink.

"Mmm... we should wait for the wedding. I don't feel comfortable stealing their moment."

"Yes, you're right."

(Jax will not be there, better wait to tell them when he can join me.)

"Don't worry. I'm not trying to hide you."

"I was not thinking anything like this."

We enjoy the rest of our dinner together.

Two weeks is too short to organize a wedding ceremony, even a small one.

I spent the last two weeks running errands, helping Bonnie and Papa Danny to get everything ready.

Today is the day, I'm at my place where Bonnie is getting ready. Papa is getting ready at his house.

I'm running up and down all morning to make everything perfect. Between the preparations and taking care of baby Jax, I didn't have time for anything else.

"Candice, give him to me. You should start getting dressed, I'd be mad if my wedding gets late because of the maid of honor."

"Ok ok..."

I give Jax to her. I'm thankful Josie came to help.

I start to dig into my beg searching for my headpiece when I spot the still wrapped box.

(Oh no! the pregnancy test. I totally forgot.)

I was so busy these past weeks, I kept saying myself I'd find a time to take the test but never happened. I didn't feel anything these weeks, maybe I won't need the test at least. I feel great, it was probably just a cold.

A few minutes later I have my hair ready and decide to take a look at Bonnie.

"Hey... May I come in?"

"Sure!"

"Omg, Bonnie! You look so beautiful."

"Do you like it?"

"Of course! It's perfect."

"Thank you Candie. You look great too, you're... glowing."

Bonnie looks at me for a moment, her eyes softening.

"Candice... I don't want to pry, it's ok if you don't want to tell me now, but are you pregnant?"

"uh! Do I look pregnant?"

I check myself in the mirror trying to get a hint of a tummy or something.

"No, is not something you can notice on your body."

"Then why this now?"

"I don't know if I can explain to you. It's something you just feel."

"Oh! honestly... I don't know. I don't think so."

I'm honest, I didn't give it much attention. Maybe the idea seems too crazy for me, this would be a terrible time.

"Well, then forget what I said. You must be right."

"Yeh, I'll dress up. I don't want to make you late for your own wedding."

I leave her and get back to my bedroom. I decide to take the test while I dress up.

I lay the stick on the bathroom counter and start to put on my dress and shoes.

I check my phone, I have a new message from Jax. It makes me smile, I wish he was here but today is an important day for him too. Also will be better without him here if Amanda decide to show up at the wedding.

**Have a great day, take pictures. I want to see how gorgeous you are. Tell Danny and Bonnie I'm sorry again. See you later.**

(I almost forgot to check the test again.)

"Candice, it's time. The car is here!"

"Going!"

I rush to take my purse before I leave I check the test.

"Oh no!"

"no no no no no...."

I check the test, again and again, maybe if I look against the light it seems different. But it doesn't matter what I do the two lines are very clear.

(ok, calm down. Maybe I did it wrong, I left the test too long on the counter. It must be wrong.)

I convince myself it's nothing and leave, I don't tell anyone about the test.

The ceremony is the most beautiful I have ever seen, everything looks perfect.

Just us and a few close friends, everything is simple as Bonnie and my grandfather.

Later we get back to Papa Danny's house to a barbecue but I can't enjoy the party, I can't stop thinking about the pregnancy test, I have to make it clear. I decide to make a second one.

"Josie, can you please take a look at him? I'll be back soon ok?"

"Sure. Don't worry."

I buy a second test and go to my place, I don't want to give the chance to get caught by anyone.

I sit alone waiting for the result, I can't take my eyes out of the test.

I hide my face in my hands, I can't believe this is happening to me. This is the worst time ever.

Again I have the same result. Two lines. My mind is spinning but I don't have time to think about this now I have to get back to the party before someone noticed.

I park in front of Papa Danny's house, I wait inside the car for a moment. I need to calm down.

When I finally decide to get inside again I find Detective Lucas waiting sitting outside the front door.