Roya's Fingers Trace Your Body

"Uriel..?"

It's the calm after the chaos, the peace after the war, the settling of the dust after a violent explosion. It's the first ray of sunshine after a brutal rainstorm, the stillness after an earthquake, the first new leaf sprouting from the ground after the devastation of a wildfire. The blooming flowers after a harsh winter. The promise of tomorrow, after the destruction of everything they thought they knew until yesterday.

Uriel was unsure if he was even breathing, maybe even immobile. Erin couldn't quite function, either. Not a single particle of air could enter or escape their lungs right now. The entrancing pull they had felt with each other had tightened in an ultimate lock, unable to be broken.

Erin swore a small glimmer infiltrated his ears, the sound of windchimes in a light breeze.

Uriel stared at the boy's face a little longer, absolutely bewitched. He was even more fascinating in real life. No single detail had been served justice in that game, for his beauty surpassed that of supreme deities. Those plump lips he loved were even pinker, and those cheeks were even fuller. He looked as if he gained weight, a little healthier, which Uriel almost swooned at. His hair was even fuzzier, frothier, blacker. He looked like something straight out of heaven, despite his deathly white skin. His skin. Oh, it looked so soft to the touch.

Uriel's weight bucked under his knees, and the Earth suddenly lost the energy to stand beneath his feet.

Erin swore he was delusional enough to materialise a vivid fantasy. Uriel, him, Busan. Uriel was here. In his room, in Busan. They don't belong in the same sentence. He mentally swore, unable to take his eyes off Uriel's sculpted face that looked so smitten, so hopeful. It was a sight people would pay to see. In that moment, his insides felt like a bag of wet sponges, soaked to the bone by whatever emotion this was that overtook him.

Erin leaned a little closer tilting his head, a few loose strands of hair falling limp against his forehead.

"Uriel..? Are you real?"

He whispered, words carried away by the night's black angel wings. He whispered, wondering if his words would go unheard. The wintry air engulfed them beneath the stars, as the Moon beamed its brilliant blue. A blue so bright, so blissful, so very blissful. The blue that stained Erin's heart as of right now faded into purple. Looking heavenward, Erin faced Uriel again, lips quivering lightly.

Uriel left his items at where he once stood, reaching over to Erin in three big strides to reach the beautiful boy before him. The world stopped revolving, the stars stopped bursting, and time had knelt before the pair, for all he could see was a frantic Uriel rushing to him with the widest grin he'd ever seen in his entire existence. Directed at him, and him only.

He slammed his body against Erin's but it he still managed to make it feel so delicate somehow. He buried his head straight into Erin's chest and his eyes fluttered shut. The soft, lulling heart beat calmed any nerves that had fluctuated, promptly cradling it into a silent hush. He wrapped his arms around Erin even tighter, grasping his waist with all his being, like he's clutching a lifeline, like he'd never seen a person in his life, whilst Erin breathed into his hair.

Roses. Erin smelt of blossoming roses. The roses that endured all things blistering and sweltering.

Erin felt as if there was no way this was a genuine event in the Cosmos' timeline. There was just absolutely no way Uriel was cosying up to his body in reality.

In his embrace, Erin's word had no axis anymore. There was no time, no wind, no rain. His soul was at peace. He felt himself curl his hands into Uriel's locks, feeling the real hair before his fingertips. They're even softer in real life. The strong pair of arms were arms he never wanted to leave. He felt shielded, protected. Like everything was going to be okay. Finally, his cold skin grew warm.

Uriel felt his scalp moisten. He looked up gently. A single tear dropped from Erin's eye, unto Uriel's pink cheeks. He couldn't help but love that feeling. He loved anything of Erin's reaching him, physically or emotionally. Even virtually. He loosened his grip just enough to wipe the tear with his thumb, moving his head away from Erin's heart. Uriel's heart stopped as this whole situation dawned upon him. He was really in his other half's arms, embraced tightly as he cried. Galloping thunderously, Erin's heart ran a marathon under the influence of Uriel's tender fingers, as his chestnut eyes explored every feature on his face. Lines of stress and tension faded from Erin's expression, leaning in to the passionate touch.

Breathing deeply, Uriel sighed like a man who had been under water for too long. He smiled softly, sweetly, and tentatively reached out to touch Erin's hair. Instantaneously, they both felt that link; the tug between them. The tug wrapped its fingers solidly around their hearts, tightening, drawing them impossibly closer. Circling his arms around Uriel's neck hesitantly, he connected their foreheads in delight.

Swaying to the rhythm of their heartbeats, the silent room was only filled with their light breathing.

"Uriel.." Erin whispered, stroking his hair.

"Shh, I'm right here," he whispered, stroking circles into his back as they rocked back and forth.

For minutes on end, they remained in each other's embrace, refusing to move. This was utopic for them; so why would they willingly leave?

Erin allowed himself to blossom with new vigour. Uriel was his Moon, and the tenderness he showed him was the life-giving moonlight. A dormant part of him burst into pulsing life, making his heart swell and pound in his chest.

"I can't believe you're actually here.." Erin breathed against Uriel's lips, mere inches away from his own.

"I can't believe it, either. I thought I'd never get to see you," Uriel mumbled, moving Erin to sit on his lap. "Stupid doctor wouldn't let me in," he huffed childishly. Any doubts he had prior, fell through his fingertips like sand.

Erin giggled, caressing Uriel's ears with the tip of his small index finger. "I can't believe you harassed the poor guy. don't even know what to say right now," he sighed in bliss.

"I do. Everything about you is even prettier in real life," Uriel fondly commented with no sense of shame, causing Erin to drop his head atop Uriel's broad shoulder.

Where there should be a flood, there is nothing, Uriel's voice echoing in the hollow of his chest.

There's no flood. There's no storm.

Only a light, switching on and off.

On, there is everything.

Erin looked over at Uriel, at the tears glistening in his eyes.

Off, and there is nothing.

Erin only smiled.

Off, and he loses everything, at the mere switch of the light.

For now, he prays the bulb never burns out.

"Oh, wait. I have a few gifts for you," Uriel gently, reluctantly released Erin, bending over to pick up a few items he dropped on the floor.

"For me? Uriel, no, you really didn't need to," Erin bit his lip to prevent his grin. As much as he didn't need to do that, Erin felt his organs shift to make way for the butterflies. This was the first gift he had gotten from any friend, ever.

"Oh, please. You're grinning like a psycho," Uriel commented, bashfully presenting a bouquet of the reddest of red roses, blooming into a garden of love, for Erin. They had swivelled and twisted, digging their roots into each other for support, so fresh, they appeared to have only recently bloomed. Roots of lavender accented the wide, scarlet petals flourished by the light graze of the sunlight, bourgeoned wide for Erin's senses to feast on. Everything from the colour, scent, size, and type, pleased the boy in more ways than he could describe.

With both hands, he carefully brought it forward to Erin, who looked like he was about to cry all over again.

"Uri!" his voice raised in pitch. "They're so beautiful! I've never gotten, like, the roses - just, thank you so much," he got up, wrapping his arms around Uriel's neck. His body stuttered in response, heartily chuckling.

"If this is the treatment I get, I'm getting you twenty-three every six seconds," they chuckled. "But, there are two more little items, so-"

Reaching for the other items on the floor, a beautiful, knitted red scarf woven to perfection, even with a few loose strings and chafing, was being gently wrapped around Erin's long neck, warming him to the core. "I actually knitted it myself. I remember you talking to me about the old Chinese myth, you know, the red string, one. I heard that scarves can, um," Uriel laughed bashfully, and continued, "they're part of that myth, and I figured it would be good for this autumn," he nervously rambled, adjusting the scarf, "you know, to keep you warm, and all." Uriel looked away. "Also, I, uh, I got you some clothes, so we can go out tonight. And no, you can't say no. I hope that stupid doctor lets us," he scratched his neck aloofly, eyes finding the floor particularly interesting in that moment.

Erin was just a little beyond overwhelmed by each and every gift, but the scarf meant a million things and more. It was truly the most heartfelt gift he could ever receive; it was handmade, and made with Erin's favourite myth in mind. All he could do was silently thank Mr Blue for bestowing arguably the person to ever walk this planet upon him. Snuggling into the scarf, he looked at the clothes, and gaped in awe. A black shirt and slacks were paired with leather shoes, forming an outfit of utter assertiveness. And, he loved every bit of it.

"Woah, you actually have style. This is really nice, like, all of, ugh! I feel like my brain's lagging by like an hour or something. I just.." Stuttering got him nowhere, so instead, Erin gave up on trying to express his euphoric storm of emotions, and just kissed his cheek instead. "Thank you."

Rubbing his cheek, Uriel grinned like a madman flashing in the dimness, poking the spot he kissed lightly.

Erin shook his head, ignoring the pounding in his ribcage. "I know it's not much, but, I can give you something of mine too?" Erin warmly hummed, eyes wide and hopeful as the latter's ears perked up.

"Better be Gucci," he joked.

Reaching below the scarf, Erin pulled a small, silver necklace with a rose pendant. Unclasping it, he wrapped it around Uriel's neck. "Forgive me, I know it's used, but I didn't know you were going to be here. I'm sorry," Erin clasped it, watching it dangle around Uriel's thick neck. "It suits you a lot, you know," he straightened the chain out.

Definitely better than Gucci.

"Couldn't ask for anything better, Rinnie," he fondled the chain dotingly, kissing the rose lightly.

A few sparks flew from the embers, warmth spreading quickly to his cheeks.

The pair walked out of the hospital after earning permission from Doctor Lee after long minutes of arguable harassment. The Doctor could probably sue, actually. Erin had changed into his new outfit, earning a dozen comments from the taller. Doctor Lee wanted to talk to Erin, but he refused. Told him to tell him after his birthday. He didn't care how urgent the topic was. The only thing he knew was that he wanted to be free, just for a night. One night was all he asked.

"You look beautiful," Uriel hummed, and Erin believed him. He felt beautiful, too. Smiling from ear to ear, he makes eye contact with Uriel. Oh, those dark pools of chocolate, begging for you to get lost in.

"You really think so?" his eyes lit up.

"My thought is fact," Uriel smiled.

Erin felt a sense of pride wash over his body. No one had ever really praised or affirmed him with words that felt this complete. Each compliment drooled out of his mouth was quenching a thirst he never even knew he had.

At one point, a single compliment for Erin made him morph into a vending machine trying to take in a crinkly old note, painful for everything and everyone involved.

He decided the air is a little different tonight. Roses are redder. He'll take the compliments like air entering lungs.

Walking out the hospital gardens, Erin felt a new thrill drive his body. He hadn't often left these grounds for approximately six years, just barely stepping into the gardens once in a blue moon. Maybe venture a bit farther, maybe accompanying Gihyun somewhere. It felt fascinating, enthralling, as if in a rapturous, distant memory. Yet, it was in his grasp, lying comfortably in the centre of his palm. Releasing a huff of air, he gazed around the exit.

"So, where are we going? Do you even know your way around here..?" Erin tried to appear confident. It was proving to be a struggle, considering he hadn't been out in years.

"We could go to my place..?"

"Pardon? Come again?" Erin's eyes popped out of his sockets.

"My place, deaf parrot. I go to Busan National University as of next week. It would be a good idea to live in Busan first, don't ya think?" he sarcastically beamed, whilst Erin's grin grew even wider.

"You can't be serious! I'm so proud of you, you must've worked so hard!"

"Only to be near you," Uriel murmured.

He felt a love that is strange and ocean-like. It's vast and deep and endless and Erin has never learned how to swim. He drowned, and he can't tell if he's lost in it, or incredibly found, or which sensation is better.

Trying to keep his composure, Erin teased him. "You're awful flirty tonight, huh?"

"Psh, that's all in your head." he rolled his eyes as he flicked Erin's temple, staring up at the ever-still sky. "There's something bothering me. There's something weird about you, like, it's unsettling. I don't know why," he sadly stated, taking Erin's hand into his own, whilst Erin stayed silent. There was nothing he could say. "Do you?"

"Do I, what?"

"Know why?"

Erin simply shook his head, tightening his grip on the large hand engulfing his shorter fingers.

Stepping out, the air just blew differently when you're outside the hospital. It felt like the promise of freedom, like you had sprouted wings. The breeze from his hospital window now embraced his whole body, and he wrapped the scarf tighter around his neck.

Busan hadn't changed by even a single millimetre. The trees still swayed, the cars still revved, and the people remained.. well, them. Staggering buildings shone brighter, windows reflecting the breath-taking image of the Moon. Erin could only smile, happy he could see Busan at least one more time.

They had reached Uriel's penthouse, and Erin marvelled at it. "Woah, so you're rich rich. Filthy rich," he trailed off, twirling across the madly vast space. It was so beyond spacious, no soul could ever feel suffocated by such a room.

The ceilings were high, adorning tree chandeliers in the focus, dazzlingly lightening the room up a yellow white. Warm wooden floors held up the forest green sofas, with a wide, flat screen TV propped up against the wall. It resembled every Zen-loving architect's dream to create, one that would take millions of won to even think to design. Uriel took a piece of Japan with him, wood vertical in rows of solidified Japanese culture.

Uriel didn't even notice its beauty up until he saw Erin twirling across the wooden floors, slipping and sliding around in his black socks, manically smiling as if he'd never seen a living room before. He grounded himself, reminding his being to feel the wood beneath his feet.

Prancing into the bedroom, Erin giggled as he jumped atop the bed, spine relishing at the feeling of a genuinely soft mattress beneath it. Money really did solve most problems.

Uriel felt his own happiness triple just by watching him, and chose not to restrain the urge of flopping in bed with him.

Smacking his body beside Erin, the pair airily chortled, simmering down as they laid flat on their back. The sky had been revealed to them through the partially glass ceiling, twinkling heavenly bodies of light hovering over them from millions of miles away.

After a few moments of dazingly stargazing, Uriel pondered.

"Jesus can walk on water, right?"

"Oh God. Is that what you were thinking so deeply about? I thought you were plotting a murder," Erin chuckled, earning a light punch to his shoulder. He hummed for a moment, nodding. "Yeah, it was one of the miracles in the new testament. Why, though?"

"Watermelons are ninety two percent water."

"..."

"I can walk on watermelons."

Erin sighed.

"I am ninety two percent Jesus." Uriel nonchalantly stated, raising his arms as if he were a holy being. "I fucking knew it, I'm far too angelic to be a peasant human."

"For the love of God, Uriel, be quiet."

"I look forward to the life-size golden statue of myself you'll gift me to celebrate my magnanimity and grandeur-"

"Did you just vomit a dictionary?"

Uriel rolled his eyes. "Shut it, twinkle toes."

"That mouth of yours is capable of catalysing World War Three. I suggest we sew those lips together." Erin absently spat, face facing upwards, eyes glancing sideways.

"Hey, you can't make me shut up in my own house," Uriel scrunched his nose.

"Oh yes I can."

Uriel shot up from lying down, squinting his eyes as he glared at Erin. "Oh no you can't."

"I am known as the dog whisperer, I can make the loudest mutts shut up," Erin smirked.

"Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?" Uriel playfully sniggered.

Erin sighed. "That joke was terrible. Please, don't ever do that again, Uncle."

Uriel smirked.

He leapt atop Erin like a tiger securing its prey, dominantly hovering over him, pinning his wrists to the pillows. His hard hands secured them in place like padlocks, sinking like sand in water, into the memory foam mattress. No single distraction could capture Uriel's gaze away from Erin, for the glint present in his eyes were what Uriel deemed to be Erin's unbreakable spell, one that kept you captivated, no matter how far you were.

His firm legs were secured on either sides of Erin's waist, locking him in place. Erin wasn't going anywhere, even if he wanted to. Eyes quivering, he bit down on his inner cheek, unable to earth the squeak he involuntarily released.

Uriel darkly chuckled, face falling low enough for his fluffy hair to tickle Erin's nose. Whispering huskily, his lips grazed Erin's ear.

"Mhm, who's quiet now?"

Uninvited and relentlessly came this immense, titanic art form of euphoric unnerve, carving a new space for itself and making itself a nest of bleeding tissue and achy muscle. It reverberated like a resilient echo, akin to either devastation or generation. No mid ground on this battlefield.

"Hey," Erin staccatoed, his voice low, breathless, a weak guttural whisper.

It felt like walking on a frozen lake with ice of an indeterminate thickness. It feels like getting home late from a party you weren't supposed to be at, like trying desperately to hold water in your hands.

The ice will crack.

The water will spill.

Goosebumps crawled over his skin the same way a million ants would, in total submission to the boy on top of him. His breath hitched in his throat, clawing at his throat, begging to escape. Cherry red lips twisted between Erin's teeth, as his eyes downturned in utter obliviousness.

Wrists twitching in his grip, the pair of lips grazing Erin's ear didn't move colder. In fact, they were a few nanometres closer. The puckered peonies known as Uriel's lips grazed Erin's ear once more, as he loitered his head up and down over it gently. The curve of Erin's ear tensed, burning a passionate red. His eyes fluttered shut as he sighed, tamely raising his head for his ear to meet Uriel's lips once more.

Erin flinched, unaware of why he's done what, unsure of how to even continue. Well, that's a lie; he knew, he knew well. He just didn't know what was going through the unreadable book that was Uriel's head. Silently scolding himself, Erin sucked in a breath from between the cracks in his teeth. Coughing, he scratched his cheek and awkwardly shuffled less than half a metre away from Uriel. Uriel opened his mouth to speak, closing it a second later.

He didn't even try to think about why Uriel did what, why his lips were tickling his ear. He didn't try, and Uriel wondered why.

Not a word filled in the medium of silence hanging over their heads. All it took was a sentence, just one sentence, and Erin could pray that Uriel would forget whatever it was that just happened. One sentence. Searching the toolbox that was Erin's thoughts, he pulled out an idea in the dark, bringing it to light.

"Do you like instant ramen?" he blurted.

Uriel cocked his head to the side, utterly bewildered.

"I, uh, I don't know..? We didn't really ever eat instant stuff in my household."

Humming in response, he said, "I'll make you some one day. Beef is the superior flavour!"

Erin imagined what his house in Japan must've looked like; as one could tell, he very desperately wanted to avoid whatever it was that happened mere seconds ago. He imagined grand paintings, a garden in their driveway, flourishing fountains, and a room for every activity. Japan's small apartments were expensive as it was, so he could hardly imagine how pricy and lavish any mansion would be. Though, the thought of Japan initiated a few rusting gears in his head to churn.

"How did you know where I was?"

"Nah," he sighed, allowing himself to fall on his back again. "Gihyun basically kinda told me, and this is the nearest hospital to your home," he shrugged, sitting up as he saw Erin stiffen. Erin shuffled to lay on his side, now face to face with Uriel as they sat on the plush mattress.

"Gihyun told you..? What else did he say?" Erin tilted his head as his brows dropped.

Uriel wondered what the big deal was, slightly concerned himself. "Nothing much, apart from the fact that you had a liver issue and that he hated me," he replied thoughtfully.

Erin's shoulders evidently slumped, as a countenance of relief washed over his scowl, wiping his face clean. "Okay, okay. Okay. That's fine," he repeated, as Uriel detected his slight panic.

Then, it hit him. The reason why he distanced himself from Uriel. He felt selfish, like the worst human to walk this planet, for allowing Uriel to be set up for heartache. But, now that he was here, he couldn't help but loving the feelings it brought to be selfish. He wanted to be selfish forever.

"Why? What did you think he was gonna say? You're being weird again, Park."

"Nothing, I just didn't want him mentioning some stuff," Erin blew off nonchalantly, flopping back onto the lush pillows.

"Yeah, I gathered that much, but what 'stuff'?" Uriel pressed, following Erin again, lying on his belly as he propped his face up against his arms.

"Uhm," think fast. "The raging case of herpes I have in my asshole?" Maybe a bit too fast. Erin had stated it as if it was one of the world's universal truths, deflecting the situation with sarcasm. Uriel gasped melodramatically, eyes downturned as a hand smacked over his mouth.

"Oh, grandpa. You cannot say such impure words! We are in a Christian fucking household," he scolded theatrically.

Erin sighed, not even wanting to address the heavy contradiction in that sentence. "We aren't even religious."

"Uh, duh, you are. We all worship the beauty that is me, therefore making us religious," he explained, throwing his beret off his head to run a hand through his luscious locks. Rolling his eyes, Erin chucked a pillow over Uriel's head.

"It makes us a cult, not a religion."

"Wait, you finally agree that I'm beautiful?" Uriel playfully teased, using the pillow Erin threw to prop his head up as he remained lying on his stomach. Smirking, he brought his face warmer to Erin, triumphantly winking. Erin dotingly ogled, as a genuine smile robbed his lips. He appeared tender, despite not even realising himself. Nodding, he blissfully closed his eyes, fluttering them open again.

"You're ethereal, Uri. Why did you fling the beret off into the abyss? It suited you," he ever so gently whispered, hand moving on its own, unsolicited, stroking the hairs covering his forehead. Uriel pursed his lips firmly as they dropped from his smirk, pupils dilating as his eyes follow every movement Erin's smooth hand made against his hair.

Basking in the warmth radiating from his enchanting fingers, he hummed in delight. For once, he decided to drop his sarcasm, and returned the charming smile Erin gave him. "Thank you, Rin."

Any hair-raising concern he had about his appearance mere hours ago, flushed away from his conscience like a ball in a whirlpool.

"I should probably get going, Uri. I can't imagine Doctor Lee being very happy if I'm not back tonight," Erin suggested, drawing his hand back to himself.

"No, you aren't. Screw what he says." He firmly stated.

"Uri, really. He's a Doctor! I should get back. I have to prepare for my...treatment tomorrow too," he really did have to go, but part of him wanted Uriel to force him to stay.

"You aren't going, and that is final, Park Erin," Uriel dominantly ordered, pressing his brows lower as he tightly gripped Erin's upper arm. Shuddering under his touch, Erin bit the inside of his cheek, nod almost going undetected. "Good. You wouldn't want me all alone in a big city, would you..?" his demeanour instantaneously shifted to one of playful philanderers.

Nodding a gentle 'no,' he raised his head to meet Uriel's chestnut orbs once more. He truly couldn't describe the sheer serenity he felt as he got lost in them, able to go even deeper than he ever could in the virtual world. They were scorching heavenly stars of bliss, planets that had its own atmosphere tailored just for them, and in Erin's case, it was nothing but sweltering warmth. He never wanted to get lost as badly as he did now. The caverns that were Uriel's emotion ridden eyes; the orbs he needed to see on a bad day, that comforted him, telling him he would be okay.

Erin's line of sight meandered across each one of Uriel's features adorning his honey skin. From his endearing, uneven yet sharp lids framed by his dark brows, down to the high nose that towered over his lips. Oh, his lips. They were wide, leaning towards the thicker side, accentuated by his strong cupid's bow. His sharp, strong jaw was raised, taut, as he raised a single brow at Erin's antics.

"Are you checking me out right here right now?" Uriel mused. Snapping out of his prolonged daze, the candy floss pink dusted over his cheeks became even more prominent. Out of nowhere, a hand flew across Uriel's face, smacking him against his ear. "What the fuck was that for you ass?" he hollered, rubbing his cheek frenziedly as he audibly sucked in air.

"Oh, sorry, I thought it was a fly on your face. Turns out it was just a pimple," Erin innocently smiled. Uriel's cheek rubbing slowed down, realisation dawning upon him.

"Oh my god, is this when I smacked you? What, like, six months ago?" he chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief.

"You bet. You really thought I was asleep, didn't you?" the corner of Erin's lips rose slyly. A lump of air hitched in Uriel's throat, eyes bulging out of his head.

"You were awake?"

"Plot twist. I gotta say, it felt nice when you played with my hair. Didn't appreciate you sideswiping my ear though," he pointed to his forehead, twisting a cluster of hair in between his fingers.

Blushing furiously, Uriel looked away, fiddling with his long fingers. "I - Whatever. I don't care."

Erin watched him fiddle with his fingers, before a twinge of balminess surfaced in his heart. "But, I care.." Uriel snapped his neck up at Erin speaking, observing him with careful eyes. "I cared a lot, actually," he timidly took Uriel's hand into his clammy ones.

"What are you saying, Erin?" Uriel tensed, but grew intrigued. All he knew was that the hand encapsulating his was a feeling he simply adored. All he wanted was to free the bird of truth, and allow it to soar from the cage of his pounding heart.

"What I'm saying is simple, Uri. Can't you see..?" he warmly giggled.

"Erin..? What's going on?"

Erin leaned over, pulling Uriel to lie atop him, chest to chest. The faint scent of musky vanilla and cinnamon infiltrated Erin's nose, grazing him ever so gently. Slithering his arms around Uriel's neck, he oscillated his fingers between his neck and shoulder blades. "Relax. You're so tense." Smiling affectionately, Erin stroked Uriel's back.

There came an unidentifiable point, blurry in the lucidity, where both of their eyes opened to look at each other. Once they were conscious enough to register it, Erin smiled at Uriel, creased eyelids and warm cheeks, and Uriel smiled back, but it was desultory, and it slipped.

Erin began gliding his index finger across the crevice of Uriel's spine, his fingertip brushing across the soft fabric, tracing and retracing imaginary lines.

"Guess what I drew," he rasped, glancing down at Uriel.

Uriel peeled his eyes away from Erin's. "I wasn't paying attention. Do it again."

Erin repeated his movements, catching Uriel's eyes peering as far back as possible, following the slide of his finger, and swatted him across his back playfully.

"You're not supposed to look!" He protested.

"Okay, okay, sorry," Uriel laughed, the sound deep and silken. He closed his eyes. "Try it again. I won't cheat this time."

Taking a moment to think, Erin smoothed his palm across Uriel's back as if to wipe off the imaginary lines and traced the outline of the same shape.

Uriel hummed thoughtfully, cracking one eye open.

"An ice cream cone?"

Erin fixed him with a pointed glare. "Jeez. Uri, don't try so hard."

Uriel bit down on a smile and tried again. "The pyramids?"

Erin snorted. "Not even triangle shaped."

He tries a few more times, feeling his heartbeat against his chest, comfort flooding in his veins with every rise and false of Uriel's chest, and Erin couldn't help but think that he could go the rest of eternity just listening to the sound of his breathing and that would be an eternity worthwhile. As much as he loved whatever this was, his heart was practically jutting out his ribcage with how incredibly nervous he was. He whispered fragilely.

"One more try, okay?"

Uriel nodded, resting his face in the crook of Erin's neck. Small fingers slithered across his wide shoulders, trickling over him like sand. He felt the letters V and E grace his back. Lines and circles merged in several different pictures and patterns, and Uriel couldn't tell if he was being too simple or too creative with his guesses. The final shape was drawn, but it felt more like a sink shape. Maybe a V. Or a H. Upon further ponder, it might've been a U.

The lights were on. Uriel's brows furrowed.

"I love you?"

It's almost sweet, so very sweet, but the question in his tone reminded Erin that it was just the game's choice rather than his own, and this flighty, irrepressible smile he grinned before he sighed only reminded him that Uriel was not his, and that, despite this, his heart had decided to set up right between Erin's teeth.

"Do you see now?" Erin smiled.

"I-" Uriel sat up. "I - Did I guess it wrong?"

Erin shook his head and wore an irrepressible smile. He sat up, and tilted his head gently.

"You guessed right, thickhead. Congrats on your first win."

Erin would be the very movement in the art of stuttering, but the night mantled him with its cosy darkness, warming his soul past the act of broken words.

Uriel sat bewildered. "I don't get it. What's the answer?"

Erin could've sworn he was dealing with a person owning a smoothed brain, but repressed a sigh and giggled. A hand slithered around Uriel's neck. He threw caution to the wind. If only he had it in his bones to care right now.

"I love you, you big idiot."