The Inner Most Desire of his Heart

'Dearest.'

Such a simple word. Yet, it held so much weight; so much meaning. Simon felt a curious warmth blossoming in his chest at that moment. It was as if his heart was an empty teacup that was being filled.

"Do you like when I call you that?"

Alabaster drew Simon's hands into his own, daring to give the tops of them a gentle brush of his lips without breaking eye contact.

"Hmph. You KNOW that I do," the tailor muttered with a hot flush taking over his cheeks, "Why must you make me admit to such embarrassing things? Do you get a cheap thrill out of it?"

"Well, I wish to confirm that you do, indeed, like the things that I'm doing to you. I'm not a mind reader, Mr. Hart."

Suddenly, the distant memory of Alabaster pulling the missing lapis lazuli cuff link from his hat came to mind.

"That's debatable and you know it."

"And-" the noble said, sidestepping the accusation with finesse, "You're right. I DO get a thrill out of it."

The tailor stared, growing more cross by the second, until he huffed and shifted his gaze away.

"How dare you."

Alabaster raised a solitary eyebrow at the tailor's soft rebuke. There wasn't a single person in the world he respected more. But, it was time to send a message. Strong fingers grasped the other man's chin, demanding his attention; calloused indifference would no longer be accepted as truth.

The sheer audacity caused green eyes to snap back to those of purest blue. But, any sour words the gentleman had for the nobleman died in his throat. Seeing those beautiful orbs, more brilliant than any sapphire, sparkling with fondness for him made Simon's heart ache. And the smile that followed shook the tailor's resolve even more.

'Oh, for the love of thimbles! If I let him get away with this, he will think that he can get away with everything! And he's been nothing short of spoiled as of late. No matter. I will set him on the right path with some discipline. I will give him the what for that this situation demands!'

"But, you're wrong about the cheap part."

Simon's breath caught as Alabaster leaned closer to him, speaking softly, as if sharing a secret.

"No. It's a decadent one, my love. Seeing that beautiful shade of red on your face and knowing that I put it there is the greatest thrill I have ever known."

With that declaration, Simon inwardly groaned. His will power had crumbled into a million, unsalvageable pieces. So much for discipline.

"You are a feast for the senses, my dearest tailor," he whispered as their forehead's met, "I could drowned in you."

A sudden churning in the deepest pit of Simon's stomach that he had never felt made itself known. It was a delightful kind of nervousness that brought with it a thrill all its own. Suddenly, Simon's gaze caught on the vampire's lips. It was only for a moment. A meager fraction of a second. But, Alabaster was nothing if not observant.

The Crystal Vampire's eyes lit up at the prospect of what his dear tailor could have possibly been requesting in not so many words. The two bodies inched closer. Ever closer, until- The chime of a bell sounded.

"Hey, before we go, can you do something about these pants, Simon, ole' pal?"

The two men took a step back from each other, just in time for Mira to appear in the entryway. As the she-elf parted her coat just enough to reveal the damage to her bottoms, a scandalized gasp was pulled out of Simon, who marched toward the windows to tug down the drapes. Before Mira knew it, the gentleman was pushing her toward the changing rooms.

"What?! I've still got my bloomers on!"

"It doesn't matter! You're indecently dressed! And what's worse is that you planned on going out like that!"

"Aw, come on! No one would of even noticed, if the wind hadn't picked up!"

The tailor groaned, imagining all of the poor, hapless souls his friend had flashed on the street, before deciding against going out in that state. He grabbed the door to the stall, closing it behind her with a slam.

"Off with them, Mira. Give them here."

"Alright, alright!"

The torn trousers were tossed over the top, landing in Simon's awaiting hand.

"And you stay in there, until I give these back to you! You may subject ME to all sorts of scandalous happenings, but I refuse to let you pull Alabaster into this. He's a noble for Heaven's sake!"

"Yeah? And I'm a princess! Your point is?"

Simon grumbled, finding it hard to counter.

"You've lost your talking privileges until properly dressed, too. Just stay in there and hush."

The she-elf blew a raspberry in his general direction, but aside from that, went quiet. Simon sank down into a chair with a box of his sewing supplies. He shifted his eyes up at Alabaster for a moment, as the man eased down into a chair across from his own. The tailor turned his green gaze back to the work at hand with a sigh.

"I do apologize. Mira is.. a bit much, sometimes."

"Yes. But, she is rather charming in her own way."

"What makes you say that?"

"She is your friend, is she not?" the vampire uttered softly with an easy smile, as he crossed one leg over the other, "That's worthy in my book."

Without his permission, Simon's lips hinted at a smile of his own. They soon fell into companionable silence. Although, the event from earlier was picking at the threads in the back of the human's head. He hadn't been in his right mind earlier, when their bodies had been edging closer and closer to an unfathomable conclusion. It was like finding himself snapped out of a spell.

By all accounts, the gentleman tailor of Bellany Avenue should have been grateful to Mira. Of course he was! His friend's interruption had perfectly shattered the questionable moment and given him back his clarity. His dignity. His composure.

'It's for the best,' he reasoned with himself, as he ducked one of Alabaster's more saccharine glances, 'Yes, all for the best.'

His needle hesitated, before piercing the fabric. Simon was a man who liked to hold control over as much of the world as he could grasp. But, nothing was held tighter than the leash around his own neck. As a self proclaimed gentleman, he prized control and discipline over all else. This should have been a triumph. But, why, then did it feel like a piece of him was in mourning?

For once in his life, Simon had found the courage to let go. Just for a moment, he was willing to get swept up in whatever foolishness he and Alabaster found together. But, that moment was gone. Possibly forever. There was no way he was getting another chance. A hand suddenly landed on the top of his own, drawing the mortal out of his spiral.

"W-What is it?"

"Your hands. They were shaking."

The tailor glanced down at his usually sure and steady fingers that had never before failed him. They were trembling shamefully like a leaf caught in a gale.

"I'm fine. It's-"

Alabaster rose to his feet. He stepped forward before raising a hand over the torn fabric.

"What are you-?"

His question was cut off, as the tailor's mind supplied him with the horrifying answer. It was followed swiftly by a certain vampire's accusation that still had the power to wound Simon like a spear to the heart.

'YOU'RE killing him!'

A hand shot out to seize his companion's wrist, tightly.

"Stop! I forbid you!"

Alabaster's brows crinkled in confusion.

"I'm afraid that I don't understand, Simon."

"You were about to have the fabric mend itself back together with your powers, because of my shaking grip. Were you not?"

Alabaster hesitated for a moment, before nodding. The tailor shook his head with a sigh. Why did he feel a headache coming on?

"Unacceptable. That won't do at all. I won't have you stealing from your own life force for something as petty as Mira's trousers."

"I wasn't doing it for her. I was doing it for you."

The tailor eyed the other man, as if trying solve a complex puzzle. As he carefully picked through all of their past interactions, he saw a common thread binding them all. Alabaster had mentioned being nothing more than a fancy hatpin, just along for the ride. He was excluded from the meetings with the king, but brought along to Lenore anyways for his beauty, his status and most of all, his powers.

'...His usefulness.'

Had the vampire been treated this way his whole life? Or rather, all of his incarnations? Just a tool to be used up? Like a lit candle giving light to a dark place, until it burned its very last?

The tailor felt a flame of his own ignite. Did Alabaster really believe that giving of his finite time on Earth was the only way to show his love? The mortal opened his mouth, only to snap it shut as one look at the other man's face caused the fire within him to smolder.

If he truly did think that his magical strength was all he had to bring to the table, this situation had to be handled delicately. Something easier said than done for the matter-of-fact man who never minced words. But, for the snowy-haired vampire he would at least try.

"I appreciate.. your aid in dire times. And your consideration of me. But, your powers shouldn't be used so frivolously. They cost you too much."

"I would give you my all, dear tailor. I would even give you the world, if I could."

"I don't want the world," Simon said with a shake of his head, "And I don't want to be the reason you die."

The vampire slowly took a seat once more, staring at the human with vulnerability dancing in his eyes. He looked so lost. Simon was also unable to find his way; how could he make him understand? Like a godsend, the vampire met him halfway.

"Then, what do you want from me, Simon Hart?"

The human shut his eyes, deep in thought. That was a very good question. One that nobody had ever asked him before. It caused him to think back to the very first moment they met.

At first, it had been only obsession. The perfect body to make the perfect suit for. After Simon was finished, the mania was supposed to subside and the human would never see the vampire again. Until he did.

It seemed that mania was catching and that it had chosen its next victim in the form of the vampire noble. That being said, Alabaster seemed to inject himself into every area of Simon's life. At first, there was nothing, but irritation. But, the turning point was when the other man rescued him from the clutches of Lord Price's cruelty.

Simon had been afraid of losing The Ode to Maria after that, but Alabaster had come to the rescue once again, inviting him to the gala. He had introduced him to so many important people. But, the highlight of the night was how they danced. How they circled one another, twirling together, until Simon had forgotten where he ended and where Alabaster began.

That thought spurred the memory of the fight with those rogue vampires and how he had been protected by the man in front of him at great personal cost. It also reminded Simon of his own inner battle. How if he didn't overcome his fears that he would never see Alabaster again. He would have done anything to save him. Even have blood on his hands.

And finally, he had even resolved to stay far away from him for the rest of his life, no matter how much it hurt. Sitting at his bedside as he watched the vampire, no, HIS vampire struggle to even speak, wanting more than anything else in the entire world for him to live- Clarity came to Simon's mind like a beam of light descending. He understood now. He knew what he wanted from Alabaster Stone. Green eyes met blue, like Earth meeting sky, as he spoke the inner most desire of his heart.

"..I want to be the reason you live."