A Bully's Bully

Back at D. W. Bell High, after finishing my breakfast, I went directly to my locker, trying to avoid the nerd. My attempt unfortunately failed as she was able to find me amongst the crowd. What, does this nerd have a JJ radar?

"Oi, JJ!" Hera called.

I groaned. "What the hell do you want this time, n-"

Before I could finish my sentence, Hera flicked me in the forehead. "I thought I told you about calling me that, Jason!" she yelled, but not loud enough to call any attention. "Shit, what the hell's up your ass this morning?!"

"Nerd, I'm not doing this," I said, slamming my locker and trying to escape She Who Bullies the Bully. "Not now, not with you!"

Suddenly, I found myself getting slammed up against my locker! Damn, that nerd is strong! What is she, some sort of Amazon woman?

"Dammit, Jason!" she screamed. "I'm so sick of you calling me a fucking nerd all the damn time! Either call me by my name or don't talk to me at all!!"

"Okay, okay, shit!" I yelled, trying to wriggle out of her grip, but to no success as it was way too strong to get out of. Where the fuck does that girl get her strength and energy?! I wondered.

"Hey! Let go of me! You're gonna mess up my hair!" I whined, slapping her hands away to protect my godly locks.

"I DON'T GIVE A DAMN!!" Hera yelled, tightening her grip. "I swear to God, if you call me a nerd one more goddamn time, I will make your life a living hell!"

I couldn't help but laugh internally at her attempt to be scary. Not gonna lie, it was low-key working. And low-key hot.

"I'm serious, Hera... I cannot afford to be late. I don't wanna get kicked out, I've already missed like... I dunno, twenty days or something!" I shouted. "So just back up, okay? Your perfume is suffocating me, damn, did you bathe in it?"

She only got angrier and refused to let me go. Now she was genuinely pissing me off.

"Well, exCUSE me!" she yelled. "You can afford to be late, just like all those times you caused me to be late to my classes!"

I sighed. "Geez, woman! Get the fuck off me and stop whining!" I shouted. "I get it, I'm a piece of shit. Now move!"

She still didn't budge.

"Fine then," I seethed, snatching one of her prized plushie keychains from her backpack. The stupidly cute Todo one because I secretly hoped to slip it into my pocket for... reasons.

"You prick!" she shouted, finally letting go. I smiled victoriously, stuffing my hand into my pocket.

"You'll get this back at the end of the week if you manage to stop throwing random hissy fits," I said, trying to walk away, but she shoved me into a locker.

"God, JJ! When someone tells you to stop doing something, maybe you should actually fucking stop! You claim you're sorry, then you go and do shit like this!"

She reached her hand into my pocket, making my heart sink. "And give this back, dickwad!" She shoved my baby Todo into her pocket and stormed off with a huff. I sighed as the bell rang. Make that 21, I guess.

***

Hera

Imagine that asshole trying to steal one of my most prized possessions... Not gonna bloody happen on my watch!

Anyway, I finally gave that asshole a taste of his own medicine and put him in his place! He's gonna end up late for AP Calculus!

I sprinted to my next class—Biology—with a smile on my face!

Off subject, I only agreed to go on the dinner date on Sunday because I actually enjoy football just as much as he does. And no, I don't mean that FIFA bullshit, either. I'm talking about quarterbacks, linebackers and touchdown passes.

As long as football was involved, I was all for it!

***

Ah, Date Day Sunday, time to meet up with the handsome idiot again...

For our third date, I had on my Sunday game day gear; I had put on my orange Broncos jersey, a blue skirt, and some blue flats. Also, I curled my hair up a bit. Don't ask why; I don't know the reason. Did I actually want to look good for somebody who's handsome, but a dick at the same time?

I stepped outside; and just in the nick of time because the airhead asshole was right outside my house.

"Go Broncos!" JJ shouted.

"Go Broncos!" I yelled back, giving the Mile High salute.

Good. We both had the exact same favorite team: the Denver Broncos! But on the downside, I kinda wished we had rivaled teams as our favorites...

***

Jason

What, you didn't know? We're both also sports nuts! And both our families absolutely love the Denver Broncos and the Utah Jazz! But sometimes, within my family, my sister, Dad and I would argue over who's the best Broncos quarterback of all time; Pops and I would favor Peyton Manning (the obvious NFL G.O.A.T., and not that asshole Tom) while Jackie would pull for a lesser player, Jake Plummer.

Anyway, I was wearing my Peyton Manning Broncos jersey, blue jeans, and my trademark white sneaks.

As soon as Hera got in the car, I began driving toward Howdy-Hoe's Western Grill and Bar. And as I was driving, I decided to turn on some hip-hop on my stereo system, which puzzled Hera.

"And here I thought you liked to listen to heavy metal," Hera said, "given you are a jock."

"Surprised?" I said. "I'm actually a man of multiple genres."

And with that, I cranked up the volume, and Hera and I jammed out to Sam Rhansum on our way. She was getting way into it. A bit much, but I can actually manage...

Minutes later, we made it to Howdy-Hoe's despite rockin' out to deez souped-up beats.

"Well, Hera," I said, shutting down my car, "it's time to get in there; it's..."

"GAME TIME!" we shouted in unison as we headed inside.

Oh, did I neglect to mention, the Broncos were about to take on one of their AFC West divisional rivals, the Kansas City Chiefs, at home. I heard that it was supposed to be a good game for them.

Howdy-Hoe's, by the way, was true to its Western-styled name, as the restaurant was a dimly lit but lively Texas themed space with a bunch of LCD TV's lining its walls and a huge projector screen in the bar area.

"Can you help us, please?" I said to Connor, the host of the restaurant. "Do you have any tables available for two next to the bar? We want to be able to watch the game and a potential victory tonight."

After a moment of checking, Connor replied: "We do! If you guys could follow me right this way, please."

And we followed him to an open and clean table; I'd expect nothing less from these guys, despite being a Western restaurant! And as we approached the table, I went over to one of the chairs and asked: "May I?"

I could tell that she was beginning to warm up to me a bit. She replied: "I guess so. Thanks."

I pulled out one of the chairs, and, instead of damaging my babymaker again (phew!), Hera actually obliged and sat in the open chair. And as soon as she sat down, I went and sat in my own chair. Even Connor seemed impressed.

"You're welcome, Hera," I told her. "See? Chivalry's not dead. It's still alive, but you just don't see it anymore."

Hera rolled her eyes with a small smile.

"Your waitress Florencia will be with you momentarily," Connor said after passing us our menus. "Enjoy your meal!"

And after he left our table to assist other patrons, I decided a little small talk would keep us occupied until Florencia came.

"Did you know I actually wrote a book, Hera?" I asked her.

"Cap," she immediately taunted.

"No, Hera, facts," I countered. "It's a science fiction novel called A Night Without the Moon."

Hera seemed to be fascinated. "Tell me more," she insisted.

"Okay," I replied. "The story takes place in a suburban area in which strange phenomena occur, but none are as strange as the moon not shining on full moon nights."

Hera seemed more intrigued in what I was saying, so I just kept going. And a few minutes later, just as I had finished my description, our waiter, Florencia, had arrived at our table.

"Welcome to Howdy-Hoe's!" she said in a friendly tone. "My name's Florencia and I'll be taking care of you today. Can I start you guys off with any drinks?"

"I'd like a Virgin Strawberry Daiquiri," I answered.

"Okay," she said, jotting it down in her pad, "and you, ma'am?"

"I'll have what he's having," Hera insisted.

After jotting it down, she asked: "And can I interest you in our Jalapeño poppers?"

"Sure," I replied.

"Excellent! I'll go get those Daiquiris ready for you!"

And as Florencia walked away, I asked Hera: "Have you ever had a Virgin Strawberry Daiquiri before?"

"I have, JJ; it's fantastic!" Hera beamed. "Have you?"

I nodded. "It's a bit tart, though."

We kept chatting for the next five minutes or so until Florencia came back with our Daiquiris. Super timely, if I must say.

"Here are your Virgin Daiquiris," she said, "and your Poppers will be ready in a moment!"

And when Florencia left, I decided to continue describing my book.

"I don't know if you know this or not," Hera said when I was done, "but I actually like reading real books. Unlike you, JJ-boy."

Um, WHAT?

"Um, excuse me!" I growled through gritted teeth. "I actually do read a lot of books, thank you very much! I, for one, took a bit of inspiration from some of them. Hell, I read every time my parents would ground me!"

"Whoa! Looks like somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed today!" Hera insisted.

"Well, of course!" I snapped sternly. "I'm not used to getting insulted like this when I'm the one who usually does it!"

"Well, not anymore!" Hera seethed, shooting me a deathly, icy stare.

Well, ain't this a bada bitch. It looks like I just got toasted... By Hera, no less. I decided to shut my trap about it before things could worsen between us.

"L–let's just look at our menus, okay?"

After that, there were about seven minutes of nerdy silence as we peered through our menus before Florencia arrived with the Jalapeño Poppers.

"Here are your Jalapeño Poppers!" she said. "And are you guys ready to order?"

"We are," I answered. "I'd like to get the BBQ Chicken and Ribs meal," I answered.

"Okay," Florencia said, jotting it down in her notepad. "And that comes with your selection of two sides."

"I'll have the steak fries and the seasoned rice."

After she wrote that down, she turned to Hera. "And for you, ma'am?"

"I'll have the Chicken Critters and Ribs meal," she answered. "And for my two sides, I'd like the loaded baked potato and the seasoned rice."

Damn, Hera! Not wasting much time, now are we?

"Okay, now let me get those out of your way," Florencia said while taking our menus, "and your meals will be ready in a few minutes!"

And as she left to put our orders in, we continued our little book chat.

"Anyway," I began, "the town's name is Lauderville; it isn't as peaceful as it would seem. There are some savage creatures that are taking lives every moonless night. I'm talking werewolves, giant serpents, vampires; you name it."

Hera nodded. "I see," she said. "So tell me, who's the main character of the story?"

"Funny you should ask," I replied, "because there's six of them. But I'm not telling you all the names now, because that would be exhaustive."

As soon as our entrées arrived a few minutes later, it was time for kickoff, and it was Denver's turn to get possession first! And when running back Phillip Lindsay caught it in the end zone, he blasted out of there at top speed, picking up forty-two yards before getting pulled down. Then, two plays later, it was first and ten, and the Broncos were in enemy territory! More specifically, the Chiefs thirty-eight-yard line.

"Come on, baby! Come on!" I yelled.

Hera and I, along with every Broncos fan in the place, watched as Flacco took the snap and, after getting out of the pocket, fired a straight on bullet pass to tight end Noah Fant. And he was wide open, too! He ran it the rest of the way, after getting some blocks from his team's offensive linemen, for the touchdown!

"YEAH!!" I yelled, pumping my fist.

All the folks in that restaurant, especially the bar area, were cheering as the good guys celebrated their TD! Even Hera and I celebrated; we even traded a double high five!

Then, when Brandon McManus kicked it off a minute later, after getting the extra point, Tyreek Hill returned it for just fifteen yards before being brought down to the twenty-one-yard line.

A few plays later, it was first down and ten from our forty-five-yard line; the Broncos were in danger of the enemy Chiefs scoring, 'cause it looked like Mahomes was gonna make some of his so-called "Showtime" magic and get a TD pass. But suddenly, Von Miller, one of our team's linebackers and Denver's star defensive player, smashed through the offensive line of the Chiefs and got to Mahomes for an absolutely crushing sack for a loss!

"Crushed him!" I shouted.

Even Hera got out of her seat and did some sort of "sack dance," which was pretty cool. But I wouldn't admit it to her face, though.

To sum the rest of it up, that game ended in a Broncos victory!