Royal Assassination

Huang Qian Jin wasn't exaggerating when he said that his father prepared a celebratory banquet for us. The moment we entered the imperial palace, I could see that the vast grounds had been turned into a fair of sorts. Rows of servants lined up among the courtyard, bearing trays. Long tables had been set up, and seated along their lengths were officials, nobles and members of big clans, high-ranking families and major sects.

I noticed that the sect leaders were mostly absent, as were the promising disciples and such. Instead, low-ranking elders had attended in their stead. Not because they were trying to slight the Emperor, but because they were simply too busily dealing with external threats and such to participate in such festivities.

That was the whole reason why the Emperor requested that I take on the mission regarding the Divine Dog of Mount Sunset.

"You are here!"

The Emperor himself came out to greet us in the courtyard, accompanied by royal guard and other servants. He beamed, unable to hide his delight. I felt as if he would have rushed forward to shake my hand if he could, but no doubt his advisors and chancellors would chide him for ruining the dignity expected of a ruler.

"Your majesty." I lowered my head and cupped my hands. Inside my head, I heard distant voices from beyond the fourth dimension screaming at me for being a beta cuck bootlicking loser who was willing to subordinate myself to other people, even if the other party was the emperor himself.

Apparently these readers only wanted edgy, arrogant assholes who didn't give a fuck what other people thought, swaggering in and acting all condescending to "mere mortals." You know, because having strength or whatever gave them the right to be arrogant and excused them from being humble in front of high-ranking people. Only the protagonist should be of the highest rank because he was a god reincarnated in human form or some bullshit like that.

I wearied of such rhetoric. Come on, reality wasn't so convenient to conform to your wish fulfilment fantasies. There was absolutely nothing wrong with being humble and diplomatic, and everything wrong with being arrogant and condescending. No man was an island, so why not just get along with everybody instead of unnecessarily making enemies? Oh, right. So that the author could contrive a cheap way for conflict and give his protagonists the opportunity to flex how overpowered they were when offended officials called them out on their rude behavior (and rightly so).

"Well done," the Emperor said, patting me on the shoulder. He stepped back and nodded toward my comrades as well. "All of you…excellent work. The Huang Kingdom is eternally in your debt. You've done us a great service."

"We only did our duty," I said, keeping my head lowered and my hands cupped. Beside me, Lan Bei Er mirrored the movement. Even though I couldn't see them behind me, I was sure Chi Yan, He Shan Jie and Hong Yao Yao were doing the same thing. As proud as he was, even Chi Yan wasn't stupid and reckless enough to show an attitude with the Emperor himself.

I didn't remember Xiao Yan doing that as well. Man, I miss the days when xianxia and cultivation stories were written decently with characters who weren't super ruthless, arrogant and chuunibyou. Tian Can Tu Dou wasn't bad, even if he relied on generic tropes. He didn't saturate his stories with one-dimensional arrogant young masters. They were still present, yes, but they were nowhere as extreme and stupid as the ones in most other cultivation stories. Come to think of it, he was probably the "pioneer" and everyone ended up copying him without exactly understanding why his stories were so successful. The whole "fiancée rejected the protagonist and thus wanting revenge" plus alchemist/receptarier cliché was probably singlehandedly inspired by him.

Good thing Chi Yan was modeled after Xiao Yan and not the likes of Yun Che, Chu Feng, Ling Jian Chen, Lu Xuan, Gu Fei Yang/Li Yun Xiao, Mo Nan, Chen Fan, Xiao Chen and more…

"Perhaps so, but you still deserve to be rewarded for such a meritous service." The emperor's eyes flickered to Huang Qian Jin. "I'm sure my fourteenth son has already told you that you can pick anything you want."

"We can discuss this later," I said, glancing at my friends and wife, who nodded. "For now, I don't think we should keep your guests waiting."

The emperor laughed. "Even now, you're still being courteous and conscientious of other people. Our Huang kingdom truly needs more people like you."

"Nah, I think they need more people like my wife." I gestured to Lan Bei Er, who blushed deeply and kicked me to shut me up.

"Hey!"

The emperor laughed, amused by our antics, and then he turned away, gesturing toward an empty table. "Please take your seats and partake in the meal. This banquet was held in your honor, after all."

"We truly don't deserve this," I said. Chi Yan snorted.

"Speak for yourself." He proceeded to a table and plopped down on the table, helping himself to the food without any hesitation. He then waved at us. "What are you waiting for? Get your asses over here!"

"You should be more reserved, senior," He Shan Jie reprimanded him, but he joined his fellow Elemental Mountain Sect disciple anyway. Chi Yan snorted.

"You guys should learn to relax."

"Well, it's true that we shouldn't let the food go to waste," Hong Yao Yao said, sidling up to the table and taking a plate of rolled eggs, steamed fish and grilled meat. She complemented them with a bowl of rice. "This looks delicious."

"Yeah, it does," I agreed. Reaching out, I grabbed my wife's hand and gently escorted her to the table. Smiling at her, I placed a plate in front of her. "Let's eat."

"Thanks."

Lan Bei Er returned the smile, and we proceeded to dig in. Hong Yao Yao was right. The food was delicious. Then again, what would you expect from such a sumptuous feast prepared by the emperor's best chefs? At least I assumed it was cooked by the emperor's best chefs. Considering the number of officials and nobles and other VIPs here, that could only be the case. Otherwise…why would he hire them and not use them during events like this?

The emperor was generous enough to even order a retinue of courtesans to perform in front of everybody. The ladies, dressed in beautiful costumes, sidled up to an artificially set up stage and placed their instruments on the wooden boards. Sitting down, they began to perform elegantly, their finger strumming across string instruments or their lips pressed against woodwind instruments to blow into them. The erhu, pipa, guzheng, guqin, bamboo dizi, and more – a dizzying assortment of musical instruments, each wielded skillfully by a courtesan. The audience listened, enraptured by the music, and I could detect spiritual qi infused into the melodic notes. The songs resonated pleasantly in the air, giving everyone a comfortable sensation.

I was suddenly reminded of Yuan Long, where Wang Sheng raised a retinue of female courtesans to be able to perform music that would help cultivators with advancing their realms or something like that. Yuan Long was actually pretty good, especially when you compared it to all the other trash cultivation stories with ruthless and arrogant protagonists with equally arrogant young masters picking fights for no reason other than because the protagonists happened to breathe in their vicinity. The characters in Yuan Long were mostly not one-dimensonal, and Wang Sheng didn't indulge in a harem and remained loyal only to Song Yan (at least in the manhua version anyway). He worked hard in raising his carp spirit to become a dragon, and he made use of his military knowledge from his previous life to help him in his isekai life.

I really recommend that you guys check it out. Just google Yuan Long manhua or something. I didn't like the animation, but I never liked 3D animation – I preferred 2D. In fact, having a protagonist and antagonists who weren't as extreme as those in the usual mass produced trashy manhua was probably why Yuan Long received an animation adaptation. Wait, why the hell was I randomly recommending other manhua in my own story?

"You don't appreciate music, do you?" Lan Bei Er asked, noticing that I was drifting away. I nodded and scratched my head sheepishly.

"Yeah, well…I prefer books to music."

"I noticed." Lan Bei Er smiled, amused. She shrugged. "We all have our preferences."

"What about you? You like music more?"

"I guess you can say that." Lan Bei Er turned back to watch the courtesans, admiring their performance. Even though I wasn't a music person, I could still appreciate how amazing the songs were. Like I said, they gave a comfortable sensation. If I wasn't mistaken, Bai Ning Shuang also used music as a weapon, so there were many applications.

Too bad they couldn't be used to help improve cultivation like in Yuan Long.

"Excellent!"

The emperor was clapping his hands after the courtesans finished playing their music. Taking their cue from him, the officials and nobles also applauded furiously, shouting their approval and whistling. The courtesans rose to their feet, gathered their instruments, and then bowed. The emperor nodded approvingly and dismissed them, and then they descended from the stage.

"That was amazing, your majesty!"

"Thank you for giving us the privilege to listen to such wondrous music!"

"That was an awesome band of courtesans! The best!"

And the readers called ME a beta bootlicker. Good heavens.

By now, the banquet was gradually winding down. The food was being finished and polished off the plates, and dessert was served alongside wine and a bevy of other beverages. I wasn't fond of alcoholic drinks, so I demurred, drinking tea instead. I like tea a lot more.

Honestly, I just wanted to go home right now. However, that would be disrespecting the emperor. Like I said, you needed tact. You couldn't just act all arrogantly and condescendingly and do whatever you liked like all those ruthless protagonists in manhua. It wasn't about "giving face" (or "why should I give you face?") like they loved to preach. It was called living and letting live.

The emperor held up a cup of wine, grinning boisterously.

"Cheers!" He shouted, and then tipped his cup toward me and my party. "To the brave heroes who saved our kingdom from a divine spirit beast!"

"Cheers!" The officials and nobles echoed, raising their cups. Chi Yan simply downed a glass of wine while He Shan Jie abstained like I did. Hong Yao Yao showed no such compunctions, sipping sweet wine and also returning the salute. Lan Bei Er and I raised our cups out of respect for the emperor and the royal family.

I could see Huang Qian Jin and Huang Wan Hai also joining in, raising their cups in our honor. I couldn't let them down.

My eyes wandered about and I suddenly froze when I caught sight of something out of place. To be more exact, I sensed more than saw, my qi sense detecting something amiss. Killing intent? But why? In an occasion like this, there was no cause for aggression…

Even as the thoughts ran through my mind, my physical body was already moving. And just in time too. I barely made it to the front of a stupefied emperor, drawing my sword and twisting about. In a sngle stroke, I deflected the flying sword meant for his heart, a huge explosion swallowing the courtyard.

"Assassin!"

"Enemy attack!"

The royal guard were spurred into action, a little too late now that I had already defended against the first blow. But given that I had dropped to my knees and was panting while leaning on my katana, I appreciated the assistance. Looking up, I caught sight of a team of black robed demonic cultivators vaulting over the walls. Dressed in black robes and concealing their faces under dark masks, their eyes blazed with murderous intent, all of them focused on the emperor behind me.

"We've come for your head, your majesty," the leader of the assassins sneered, drawing a dagger and unsealing it with Man and Sword as One. "Assassinate, Death Blade!"

Qi exploded around him, turning the dagger into a jagged, edgy blade that emanated a wave of eerie energy.